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Thread: The anti-socialist/Teabagger pledge! Sign it today!

  1. #1
    Elite Member Grimmlok's Avatar
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    Talking The anti-socialist/Teabagger pledge! Sign it today!



    The Teabagger Socialist-Free Purity Pledge

    I, ________________________________, do solemnly swear to uphold the principles of a socialism-free society and heretofore pledge my word that I shall strictly adhere to the following:

    I will complain about the destruction of 1st Amendment Rights in this country, while I am duly being allowed to exercise my 1st Amendment Rights.

    I will complain about the destruction of my 2ndAmendment Rights in this country, while I am duly being allowed to exercise my 2ndAmendment rights by legally but brazenly brandishing unconcealed firearms in public.

    I will forswear the time-honored principles of fairness, decency, and respect by screaming unintelligible platitudes regarding tyranny, Nazi-ism, and socialism at public town halls.

    I pledge to eliminate all government intervention in my life. I will abstain from the use of and participation in any socialist goods and services including but not limited to the following:

    * Social Security
    * Medicare/Medicaid
    * State Children's Health Insurance Programs (SCHIP)
    * Police, Fire, and Emergency Services
    * US Postal Service
    * Roads and Highways
    * Air Travel (regulated by the socialist FAA)
    * The US Railway System
    * Public Subways and Metro Systems
    * Public Bus and Lightrail Systems
    * Rest Areas on Highways
    * Sidewalks
    * All Government-Funded Local/State Projects
    * Public Water and Sewer Services (goodbye socialist toilet, shower, dishwasher, kitchen sink, outdoor hose!)
    * Public and State Universities and Colleges
    * Public Primary and Secondary Schools
    * Sesame Street
    * Publicly Funded Anti-Drug Use Education for Children
    * Public Museums
    * Libraries
    * Public Parks and Beaches
    * State and National Parks
    * Public Zoos
    * Unemployment Insurance
    * Municipal Garbage and Recycling Services
    * Treatment at Any Hospital or Clinic That Ever Received Funding From Local, Stateor Federal Government (pretty much all of them)
    * Medical Services and Medications That Were Created or Derived From Any Government Grant or
    * Research Funding (again, pretty much all of them)
    * Socialist Byproducts of Government Investment Such as Duct Tape and Velcro (Nazi-NASA Inventions)
    * Use of the Internets, email, and networked computers, as the DoD's ARPANET was the basis for subsequent computer networking
    * Foodstuffs, Meats, Produce and Crops That Were Grown With, Fed With, Raised With or That Contain Inputs From Crops Grown With Government Subsidies
    * Clothing Made from Crops (e.g. cotton) That Were Grown With or That Contain Inputs From Government Subsidies
    * If a veteran of the government-run socialist US military, I will forego my VA benefits and insist on paying for my own medical care



    I will not tour socialist government buildings like the Capitol in Washington, D.C.

    I pledge to never take myself, my family, or my children on a tour of the following types of socialist locations, including but not limited to:

    * Smithsonian Museums such as the Air and Space Museum or Museum of American History
    * The socialist Washington, Lincoln, and Jefferson Monuments
    * The government-operated Statue of Liberty
    * The Grand Canyon
    * The socialist World War II and Vietnam Veterans Memorials
    * The government-run socialist-propaganda location known as Arlington National Cemetery
    * All other public-funded socialist sites, whether it be in my state or in Washington, DC



    I will urge my Member of Congress and Senators to forego their government salary and government-provided healthcare.

    I will oppose and condemn the government-funded and therefore socialist military of the United States of America.

    I will boycott the products of socialist defense contractors such as GE, Lockheed-Martin, Boeing, Northrop Grumman, General Dynamics, Raytheon, Humana, FedEx, General Motors, Honeywell, and hundreds of others that are paid by our socialist government to produce goods for our socialist army.

    I will protest socialist security departments such as the Pentagon, FBI, CIA, Department of Homeland Security, TSA, Department of Justice and their socialist employees.

    Upon reaching eligible retirement age, I will tear up my socialist Social Security checks.

    Upon reaching age 65, I will forgo Medicare and pay for my own private health insurance until I die.

    SWORN ON A BIBLE AND SIGNED THIS DAY OF ____________ IN THE YEAR ______________.

    ___________________________ ___________________________

    Signed Printed Name/Town and State
    I am from the American CIA and I have a radio in my head. I am going to kill you.

  2. #2
    Elite Member Fluffy's Avatar
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    Where did you find this?

  3. #3
    Elite Member cupcake's Avatar
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    a bunch of places like here:
    Blog for Democracy
    My grace is sufficient for you, for my my strength is made perfect in weakness...I love you dad!
    Rip Mom

  4. #4
    Elite Member *DIVA!'s Avatar
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    It was originally on KOS...
    Baltimore O's ​Fan!

    I don''t know if she really fucked the board though. Maybe just put the tip in. -Mrs. Dark

  5. #5
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    That is PERFECT. I am going to damn well print this out in multiple copies and hand it to my bigmouth neighbor who listens to Rush. And my dad. I may also send it to my DH via email so he can send it to choice people at work.

  6. #6
    Elite Member kingcap72's Avatar
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    'where our children shouldn't fear having to be indoctrinated by socialist, negro presidents.'

    It gives the Tea Baggers too much credit for knowing what 'indoctrinated' means and for not using a different N-word.

  7. #7
    Elite Member KrisNine's Avatar
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    I still snicker at Tea-baggers!!

  8. #8
    Elite Member Sassiness's Avatar
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    just made my day

  9. #9
    Elite Member Chilly Willy's Avatar
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    Mine, too.
    Hello mother fucker! when you ask a question read also the answer instead of asking another question on an answer who already contain the answer of your next question!
    -Bugdoll-



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