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Thread: How Jay Leno should start his monologue

  1. #1
    Bronze Member
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    Default How Jay Leno should start his monologue

    Jay should use the line Jack Paar used after Paar walked off for a couple of weeks then returned-

    "As I was saying..."

  2. #2
    Elite Member *DIVA!'s Avatar
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    I'm a whiny punk bitch, and I sucked at 10p.m. I am forever in Conan's shadow, so when the show goes in the shitter...it will be no one's fault but my own!
    Baltimore O's ​Fan!

    I don''t know if she really fucked the board though. Maybe just put the tip in. -Mrs. Dark

  3. #3
    Elite Member gas_chick's Avatar
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    Hi I'm Jay Leno and I've taken the Douche King crown from John Mayer.

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    Elite Member JadeStar70's Avatar
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    I guess I will read about it here. I have banned him from my tv viewing.

  5. #5
    Elite Member LynnieD's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by *DIVA! View Post
    I'm a whiny punk bitch, and I sucked at 10p.m. I am forever in Conan's shadow, so when the show goes in the shitter...it will be no one's fault but my own!
    Yea, I like this one.

    And you know the show will fucking go DOWN.....and I cannot wait. And I sure as shit won't watch it. F you Jay.

  6. #6
    Elite Member McJag's Avatar
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    Four score and...
    I didn't start out to collect diamonds, but somehow they just kept piling up.-Mae West

  7. #7
    Elite Member Brookie's Avatar
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    [Unpopular Opinion]Welcome back, Jay. Guess I'm one of the only folks on here looking forward to tonight.[/Unpopular Opinion]
    Life is short. Break the Rules. Forgive Quickly. Kiss Slowly. Love Truly.
    Laugh Uncontrollably. And never regret ANYTHING that makes you smile.

    - Mark Twain

  8. #8
    Elite Member kingcap72's Avatar
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    Jay should say 'Once upon a time, there was a host of the Tonight Show named Conan O'Brien, and then I decided he wouldn't exist anymore because I had NBC by the balls and made him disappear. Miss me?'

  9. #9
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    "my name is jay leno and i'm an unfunny asshole with a giant chin"
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

  10. #10
    Elite Member Sundance's Avatar
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    I'm back & NBC should save everyone the trouble & just go ahead & cancel me now.

  11. #11
    Elite Member mrs.v's Avatar
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    Fuck this asshole.
    eat a hot bowl of dicks.

  12. #12
    Elite Member Grimmlok's Avatar
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    I am from the American CIA and I have a radio in my head. I am going to kill you.

  13. #13
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Fuck Conan.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

  14. #14
    Elite Member gas_chick's Avatar
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    I'd love to.

  15. #15
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    ^^^
    ditto.
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

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