Page 4 of 9 FirstFirst 12345678 ... LastLast
Results 46 to 60 of 123

Thread: Gay Adoption- Your honest thoughts

  1. #46
    Elite Member msdeb's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    in a van down by the river
    Posts
    39,431

    Default

    ^^^ saved me from getting banned! my thoughts exactly (i think i was literally paralyzed for a moment)
    Basic rule of Gossip Rocks: Don't be a dick.Tati
    Lighten Up Francis WCG

  2. #47
    Elite Member Sojiita's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Central Duh-hio
    Posts
    22,811

    Default

    Anyone who is against gay adoption just disgusts me(yeah I am a little pissed of right now..I will get over it so yeah the words fit for right now). All of this shit about What God intended(what..you spoke to him/her/it?)..nature(tell that to the gay animals)..needing both a mother and a father for a parent(so single straights should not be able to adopt either then??? And just because there may be two men or two women as parents does NOT mean that the child will not have a GREAT deal of involvement with adults of the 'missing' sex. The gay male couples who I have known who adopted always went out of their way to make sure there were good female role models(mothers, aunts, straight and gay female friends, etc etc.) to try and ensure a diverse and upbringing as possible. Same with the lesbian couples. These children were DAMN LUCKY IMO.

    Hell a huge percentage of kids are growing up with only one parent..yet two loving parents of the same sex who will most likely provide a good life, lots of care, a diverse atmosphere, role models of the 'missing' sex..couples who really WANT kids and who are not just stuck with them cause someone got knocked up or forgot the condom or birth control (and was against abortion of course cause it it 'against God"-again when did they speak to him/her/it?)
    -are frowned upon simply because they are not 'a mother and a father'..as if those roles are set in stone and every household composed of those two entities is simply ideal. How many times has some member here said "Thank God we did not have kids cause before we divorced my husband/wife went batshit crazy/on drugs/turned into a religious freak" etc etc. -as if Just the presence of a 'mother and father' is enough..please! What about simply At least ONE quality parent, and If TWO quality parents then even better!


    Christ I can believe how ignorant and narrowminded some posters are on here regarding this issue

    *My now dead long-term partner had 3 children before he divorced and came out of the closet. They are all normal, successful, and well adjusted adults. His youngest son chose to live with us until he was 18 and went away to college. He is now a vice president at a bank with two beautiful children, one of which is adopted-a girl who was abused by BOTH her natural born mother and father.*
    Don't slap me, cause I'm not in the mood!

  3. #48
    Elite Member Grimmlok's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    In WhoreLand fucking your MOM
    Posts
    55,372

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by southernbelle View Post
    I don't think a baby should be an option for them. I believe that they should have to take a child who is already old enough to make the decision. There would be no waiting involved and it would help place a lot of older kids who frequently get passed over because of their age.
    Yeah, but the idea isnt to get older kids a chance, its to restrict gay couples from adopting infants because of...... what?

    What's the justification?
    I am from the American CIA and I have a radio in my head. I am going to kill you.

  4. #49
    A*O
    A*O is offline
    Friend of Gossip Rocks! A*O's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Being Paula
    Posts
    30,395

    Default

    Calm down! I don't think anyone (inlcuding this 'longterm poster') disagrees with what you are saying Soj. But you have to concede that this issue does raise some interesting questions about what actually consitutes a 'good parent'. Personally, I'd prefer to see a child raised in a stable, loving home by a gay couple than a single woman with a string of kids by invisible or abusive deadbeat dads simply because she has a 'right' (and the biological equipment) to be a parent. But I still think we need to be very aware of pros and cons of gay parenting (and there are cons whether we like it or not, just as there are cons to hetero parenting). You can't tell me that a 3yr old isn't at least going to be curious to know why their school friends have a Mom/Dad when they have a Dad/Dad or Mom/Mom.

    And it's not only hetero couples who have to deal with addictions, abuse, poor parenting skills, ignorance, laziness, divorce, abandonment, infidelity and a million other things that are detrimental to childrens' wellbeing.
    I've never liked lesbianism - it leaves a bad taste in my mouth
    Dame Edna Everage

    Just because you're offended doesn't mean you're right.

  5. #50
    Elite Member Grimmlok's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    In WhoreLand fucking your MOM
    Posts
    55,372

    Default

    So the kid wonders.

    Solution?

    Tell him.

    Why all this avoidance?
    I am from the American CIA and I have a radio in my head. I am going to kill you.

  6. #51
    Elite Member Sojiita's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Central Duh-hio
    Posts
    22,811

    Default

    I removed the 'long term poster' part..I had misread something so I apologize for that(that was why I edited it after I read back). I also change the wording as well..

    I am sick(again) worn out, emotional, and no I am not calming down..in fact I feel like staying pissed so there!

    Again the 'issues' are the same issues that SOCIETY just needs to deal the fuck with..just like with an interracial couple..'why is your daddy black and your mommy white..' Just TELL THEM the truth! It does not have to be some graphic detailing of human sexuality..it is very simple. And it is usually the adults who have the problems-not the kids..with the exception of the kids who have been poisoned with bigotry by mommie and daddy

    and regarding the last part..With adoptions the gay couples will be SCRUTINIZED for past or any seeming incipient problems..(hell no way in hell would I be allowed to adopt a kid if I had a partner or not!.. ) Same with adoptive straight parents -unlike the vast majority or straight parents who can just pop em out willy nilly..and we see the result of that everyday here in the news threads...

    I just get fucking sick and tired of being discriminated against! I hate having to hear about this stupid shit, about people I know being hurt, attacked, about parents disowning their gay children, about kids having to go to schools where open hostility and hatred towards gay teens is tolerated. I am offended by the stupid and irrational stereotypes and the persecution against gays by certain religious groups. And I live in a fairly liberal city(especially for a midwestern city..Huge University really helps there).


    It is good to vent sometimes.
    Don't slap me, cause I'm not in the mood!

  7. #52
    Hit By Ban Bus! ediebrooks's Avatar
    Join Date
    Dec 2005
    Location
    In another dimension, untouched by time
    Posts
    6,830

    Default

    I'm so sorry, Soj. Gay people do have to put up with a lot of abuse and discrimination, and it's just not right. And for the record, I have no problem with gay adoption. A child just needs to be with someone who will love him and give him a stable home. That's all that counts.

  8. #53
    Hit By Ban Bus! AliceInWonderland's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    you already know.
    Posts
    44,442

    Default

    well i dont think its fair that just b/c you're hetero or in a hetero relationship that you get to adopt and for the reason only that you're in a gay relationship that you can't for that silly reason.

    but its good that we're being honest here b/c hopefully then those who need education on the matter; recieve it.

  9. #54
    Elite Member Sojiita's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Central Duh-hio
    Posts
    22,811

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by ediebrooks View Post
    I'm so sorry, Soj. Gay people do have to put up with a lot of abuse and discrimination, and it's just not right. And for the record, I have no problem with gay adoption. A child just needs to be with someone who will love him and give him a stable home. That's all that counts.
    It has just been a tough week. Thanks ediebrooks. Anyone should realize that a gay couple will go through WAY more scrutiny than a straight couple. That is just the way it is..any agency will want to CYA so nothing goes wrong cause they will be scapegoated as well. I really feel for the gay minorites..minorites within a minority..double discrimination. A few years ago there was a big brou-haha because not ony did a gay couple want to adopt a little boy..one of the gays was (gasp!) BLACK! You would not believe the turmoil that resulted over that.

    Things are getting better..but sometimes it feels like two steps forward, one step back.

    *and yeah..I am not perfect and have my own issues with discrimination(religion-mainly Islam for example) but at least I can fess up to it, admit it, work on it, and not actively cultivate it!*


    LOL..can you imagine if I was ever to try and adopt..*HE WAS INVOLVED IN A FISTING ORGY!!! we found evidence online on this Trashy Gossip site! LOL
    Don't slap me, cause I'm not in the mood!

  10. #55
    Elite Member Palermo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Nor Cal
    Posts
    9,518

    Default

    I know several gay people who have either had kids personally or adopted them. Personally I prefer if they adopt kids that are already here, because Lord knows there are plenty who grow up in homes. But I feel that way anyway, I have never felt the biological urge to produce any kids.

    Plenty of kids grow up in single family homes, I don't think there's anything wrong if two people want to share that experience, it's got to lessen the load.

  11. #56
    Super Moderator NoDayButToday's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Florida
    Posts
    14,272

    Default

    There's a really good documentary about gay parenting called Daddy & Papa. It's about 5 years old and follows 3 (I think, may be 4...) stories of gay men adopting children or choosing the surrogate route. It's well made and pretty informative, and incredibly sad when you realize how little has changed in the last 5 years.

    It covers a whole slew of topics from white men having to adopt black children b/c they are the "undesirables" that straight parents don't want all the way through gay divorce and the effect on the children. It's very interesting to watch if you can find a copy.

  12. #57
    Elite Member DoveFeatheredRaven's Avatar
    Join Date
    Apr 2007
    Posts
    2,080

    Default

    Saying that gay couples should not be allowed to adopt babies is like saying they are not good enough. Sexuality should not be considered in this. The character of the person, their ability to provide a good home both emotionally and financially, etc. I just don't agree with that statement at all.
    Last edited by DoveFeatheredRaven; June 15th, 2007 at 07:02 AM.

  13. #58
    Silver Member
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Posts
    595

    Default

    I live in a very "liberal" part of Houston ( can you believe it?! lol). The couples who live here are very stable and loving. One couple decided to take care of the one man's crack addict sister's baby. The child is adored and well taken care of, and you've never seen prouder parents.

    I love children, and I cannot in good conscience deny a good loving home to any child because of what happens in their parents bedrooms.

    YOu know, my father lost his very good job( remember that song ALLENTOWN...yeah we lived it...lol) when I was young and we were made fun of for being poor. I would've liked the opportunity to choose richer parents...
    http://dorkdejour.blogspot.com Just Pimpin my Podcast!!

  14. #59
    Elite Member McJag's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    42,527

    Default

    Remember, kids end up getting embarrassed by parents no matter what. Mom too fat,too flashy,too tall,too short. Dad too fat,has mustache,doesn't have mustache,car he drives,etc. Parents of especially teens are embarrassing because they are parents.Ya gonna get riduculed for something any way! Let us please not be judgemental-Unless you yourself are helping some way to directly support these kid in foster care, you really have no right to criticize others.
    I didn't start out to collect diamonds, but somehow they just kept piling up.-Mae West

  15. #60
    A*O
    A*O is offline
    Friend of Gossip Rocks! A*O's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Being Paula
    Posts
    30,395

    Default

    The original poster (a gay man BTW) asked for 'honest' opinions. I wish we could debate every angle of this important topic objectively without getting personal or assuming that just because someone expresses a view that it's their personal opinion. Let's open up the debate instead of trotting out the usual PC platitudes for fear of being accused of being homophonic or bigoted. Whether we like it or not there are people who are genuinely unhappy about this subject and shouting them down as being ignorant (or worse) isn't going to make them change their minds - quite the opposite in fact.

    Of the several gay couples I know, none has ever expressed a wish to have children. In fact, some of them absolutely do NOT want kids under any circumstances. Ditto several hetero couples I know who are finally daring to say they do not want to be parents. You should hear the crap the rains down on them from people demanding to know why they are so 'selfish' or plain 'weird' for not wanting to breed. You can't win.
    I've never liked lesbianism - it leaves a bad taste in my mouth
    Dame Edna Everage

    Just because you're offended doesn't mean you're right.

Page 4 of 9 FirstFirst 12345678 ... LastLast

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Be honest - how many shoes do you have?
    By A*O in forum Fashion
    Replies: 63
    Last Post: January 8th, 2008, 05:43 PM
  2. Replies: 16
    Last Post: October 22nd, 2006, 04:15 PM
  3. Food you pick at -- be honest!
    By pacific breeze in forum Food and Cuisine
    Replies: 5
    Last Post: January 9th, 2006, 03:01 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •