I bet the man wasn't properly feeding the dog. damn them for,putting him to sleep.
Growing up. we had this alcoholic paralyzed guy who,lived down the street from us. He had a pet ferret that chewed a hole in his leg when he was passed out in his house.
Did you know that an anagram for "Conscious Uncoupling" is "Iconic Uncool Pus Guns"? - MohandasKGanja
When I first moved onto this road, we had one of the neighbours tell us about another neighbour who was a drunk, passed out and burned his junk with a cigarette. He didn't go to see a doctor but instead showed up on these people's doorstep a week or so later because he heard they knew first aid, unzipped and displayed his now infected member. They told him to go straight to the hospital emergency.
"I feel like the red carpet question 'who are you wearing?' has Texas Chainsaw undertones." -- Richard Ayoade
My friend worked at A&E and somebody came in having "slipped and fell" onto a light bulb, and it had gone straight up his arse.
Ain't nothing wrong with Ohio wang! - MontanaMama
there's a book of x-rays of people who have gone to the emergency room with weird shit stuck up their asses. it's amazing.
I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld
I think I'll start giving the cats a little extra food....just in case.
The more people I encounter, the more I like my animals.
One morning the Bloke woke from his naked slumber and did what most men do when they first wake up - he started giving his pods a good old scratch. The cat woke up from her spot on the end of the bed, saw what he was doing and thought "It's moving! KILL IT!" and launched herself at him, claws out. I nearly fell out of bed because I was laughing so hard.
I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. Hunter S Thompson
How big would a T-Rex wang be?! - Karistiona
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