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Thread: I feel so bad

  1. #1
    Gold Member honeysuckle's Avatar
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    Default I feel so bad

    ok here is the story.......we have two dogs a lab she is about 3 and a husky she is 1. they have been getting out here lately. it all started with a dog that runs up and down our privacy fence and instigates my dogs. one day they got out and our neighbor brought them back and come to find out they (or the other dog) had broken a plank on the fence. so we fixed it. the next day they were out again and two planks were broken this time. well it gets worse the husky is in heat this is her first cycle. and she hooked up with a golden retriever. don't know if she is pregnant or not because it has been two weeks at the most. but i also have a baby and i can not keep running around trying to catch damn dogs and when they get out i have to fix whatever they are messing up and since we fixed the fence good (replacing half the planks) they have started digging out. i would like to get rid of the dogs because we don't have time for them and i feel like i am neglecting them. the lab would go back to my husbands parents since it is their dog. and we would have to figure out what to do with the husky but i don't want to just dump her on someone while she is pregnant. the vet wants $320 to abort and spay her. then we would get rid of her because we just found out that we are going to be owning our own business in late dec early jan. so that is even less time to deal with them. i just feel really bad i would not want anyone to take my babies from me..........i just don't know. if you could suggestions would be nice. thanks

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    Sounds like a difficult situation, honeysuckle, and you're handling it the right way by taking your time to make a decision you can live with. Good luck

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    Elite Member crumpet's Avatar
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    Honeysuckle, I can identify with feeling overwhelmed and animals are a huge responsibility. However, if no one else will say it I will: it is always extremely frustrating to hear of otherwise healthy adults who become so willing to 'give up' or 'rehome' a beloved pet (or several) because it's just become too much trouble. This holds true even when the owner rationalizes the actions by saying that they feel guilty for neglecting the animal. Really, don't people stop and realize when they take this responsibility that it is a commitment for the lifetime of the animal and not just to occupy the empty space you have in between jobs or until a baby comes along? Even worse are people who say it's too much trouble to take care of their pets when they have a baby, then they turn around and have.......another baby (or in your case take on another huge responsibility). I do not doubt that you feel badly and despite what I've expressed here, I am not saying that you are a bad person. I can understand these situations when someone becomes very ill or has to go into a nursing home. Aside from those extreme circumstances I just honestly feel like all other excuses are cop outs and I have to wonder how much the pet owner really cared about their animals in the first place.

    I fully expect to be lectured by at least one or two people about how the baby has to come first, blah blah blah. But the reality is that many, many responsible pet owners manage to honor all of their responsibilities and do not treat some as though they are disposable. Before anybody blasts me, just keep in mind that she put this out here on the web giving anybody who reads it the opportunity (and, frankly, the invitation) to give their input.

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    Well I remember being 8-1/2 months pregnant and we had a dumb golden retriever who could not be trained - we had taken him to 2 different trainers. He was just too old and untrained when we paid a fortune for him, and it was a big lesson to us. While using the "choke/jugular" method at 8-1/2 months pregnant I screamed at my husband "either this dog goes or I go" and I meant it - all while screeching parakeets kept time in the background - and I love parakeets. We found a $50 home for the dog and I'm sure it was happy where it went.

    I think honeysuckle is realizing they probably made a mistake and she wants to set it right... and I think that fact should be acknowledged.

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    Gold Member honeysuckle's Avatar
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    yes i do realize it was a mistake. but we would have no time because when we start our own business it will be a 45 min ride to one store and an hour ride to the other working from 7-6(business hours that is not including personal/owner time) when would i have time for the dog? i just don't know what to do. she is very pretty someone will take her i know. but should i abort the babies if she is pregnant or just let the next owner decide but then i don't know when the next owner would come along.

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    If she's a golden, my dad would take her except he just rescued one a couple years ago, and it took him a long time to work with her, but the dog is basically fine (she still wanders off if not watched and pulls fruit off trees that she scarfs and barfs).

    I'm sure that you can contact a gold rescue in your area. Don't let the Ellen debacle scare you. My dad has rescued two goldens, one male and one female. Both of them happened to come from the "pound" but when I was helping him look, I saw several on the web. Those were located in the west, but I'm sure there are some in the south. Maybe you could do a google search and take it from there?

    As for the puppies, I would be for aborting them. Bringing more unwanted mutts into the world is going to exacerbate the problem. You'll probably have to include spaying in that. Most vets are pretty firm about spaying.

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    Gold Member honeysuckle's Avatar
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    the lab is my husbands parents. they lost their house so we were keeping her because we have a backyard with a fence. but the husky is ours and that is the one that might be pregnant and the one we need to find a home for. so i don't feel bad about the lab she has a home. and the vet said that price included the abortion and the spay so i am thinking that they do not abort with out spaying. i don't think i would ever get another animal other than fish after this.

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    Oh yeah, sheez I must be tired today, I'm der-ing all over the place

    There are lots of rescues for each breed, I think you should check it out! Huskies are nice dogs and I'm sure there is someone who will want her. There are "car relays" where people will drive a certain amount of miles to hook up with other rescue volunteers. Maybe she would be happy in a colder climate, too?

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    Have your dog fixed and have the doggie abortion. If you don't, she will probably end up being put to sleep. Momma dogs are almost impossible to find homes for. The puppies may or may not find perm good homes and she will probably have a large litter. Also find a Husky rescue if you can.
    If you can't be a good example -- then you'll just have to be a horrible warning

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    Gold Member drama_queen's Avatar
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    I feel sorry for the poor husky.

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    Quote Originally Posted by honeysuckle View Post
    i don't think i would ever get another animal other than fish after this.
    Maybe in a few years you will revisit the idea of pets when your children are older. And the business running smoothly, etc. Life has a way of changing and you could see your way clear to one pet at some point.

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    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    I think the doggie abortion is the best option here, as you don't want to risk having to find a home not only for your husky, but her litter too. Keeping her intact/un-spayed is the least of your concerns. It's a sad thing to do, but I believe it's in the dog's best interest. What is your time frame for getting rid of the husky?
    Last edited by Beeyotch; November 13th, 2007 at 03:16 AM.

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    Elite Member crumpet's Avatar
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    Maybe in a few years you will revisit the idea of pets when your children are older. And the business running smoothly, etc. Life has a way of changing and you could see your way clear to one pet at some point.
    Please don't encourage her. In a few years the kid/s (who are a lot more work than an infant) will be begging for a pet doggie and a few weeks after the novelty wears off they'll forget to feed it and mom will get tired and overwhelmed at having to feed and walk the dog. By then the kids will be at the age where they are having to be carted around to ballet and soccer three times a day and that, combined with being a working mom running her own business, will be too much to handle and we'll be right back here again.

    Fish or hermit crabs seem like a safe bet.

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    Elite Member Aella's Avatar
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    You should definitely abort the poor dog's pregnancy-I think one canine life ruined is quite enough.

    And I agree with crumpet, please don't ever get pets (other than maybe fish) again.

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    Quote Originally Posted by crumpet View Post
    Maybe in a few years you will revisit the idea of pets when your children are older. And the business running smoothly, etc. Life has a way of changing and you could see your way clear to one pet at some point.
    Please don't encourage her. In a few years the kid/s (who are a lot more work than an infant) will be begging for a pet doggie and a few weeks after the novelty wears off they'll forget to feed it and mom will get tired and overwhelmed at having to feed and walk the dog. By then the kids will be at the age where they are having to be carted around to ballet and soccer three times a day and that, combined with being a working mom running her own business, will be too much to handle and we'll be right back here again.

    Fish or hermit crabs seem like a safe bet.
    Actually, on rethinking I think you're correct. Some people just aren't pet people - at least not the kind that take a lot of work. I'd like a dog but can't have one here. Even if I could have one I wouldn't do it right now. It's too much work, and it would crimp my style. Dogs are an investment and they are like children. You always have to arrange care for them if you're going to be gone. I can leave my cat for 5 days with food and water and fresh litter, and have a friend look in and pet him lovingly a couple times. He doesn't like it all that much, but it is possible.

    What I was referring to is that children love pets and it's a good way to teach them a lot of things that are good for them to know. That's what I had in mind when posting that comment.

    Oh and I'm all for having a big yard so that walking the dog isn't the only option for their exercise. When I was growing up, we never walked our dog. We played with him in the backyard. I understand a lot of people nowadays have to walk their dogs, but it isn't the only way they can get exercise.

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