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Thread: Detroit Man Killed While Driving and Masturbating to Porn

  1. #1
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Default Detroit Man Killed While Driving and Masturbating to Porn

    Detroit motorist watching porn on phone crashes, dies

    The Detroit News 6:15 a.m. EST January 27, 2016

    Detroit — A Detroit man watching a porn movie while driving his car got into an accident and died.

    The man, who wasn’t wearing pants, was watching the movie on his cellphone, said police.

    The driver, 58, wasn’t wearing a seat belt and was partially ejected through the sunroof.

    A state police spokesman said it’s the strangest incident he ever encountered.

    “There’s so much technology out there a lot of people are more paying attention to what they’re doing other than driving their car,” said Lt. Mike Shaw of the Michigan State Police.

    The accident occurred Sunday at 3:30 a.m. as the car was traveling south on the Lodge ramp to Interstate 75 in Detroit, said police.

    The driver lost control of the 1996 Toyota and it rolled over. No other vehicles were involved in the wreck.

    He was pronounced dead at the scene. The police are continuing to investigate.

    http://www.detroitnews.com/story/new...dies/79370556/


    He couldn't drive to a secluded park or something before he rubbed one out like a normal perv?
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

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    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    This reminds me of Alice.
    msdeb likes this.

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    Elite Member panic's Avatar
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    what a spaz. i'm glad he didn't kill anyone else for the sake of watching his porn.
    Lalasnake and C_is_for_Cookie like this.
    "His suits are cheaply made because he makes them in other countries, taking jobs away from good, hard-working Americans."...Bevy Smith on Donald Trump

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    Elite Member faithanne's Avatar
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    and was partially ejected through the sunroof.
    I misread this part and thought at least he died happy. Partially.
    Lalasnake, Sleuth, SHELLEE and 8 others like this.
    "You're going to die tomorrow, Lord Bolton. Sleep well."



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    Elite Member Trixie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beeyotch View Post
    This reminds me of Alice.
    I guess I must have missed something...
    These people don't give a fuck about YOU or us. It's a message board, for Christ's sake. ~ mrs.v ~
    ~"Fuck off! Aim higher! Get a life! Get away from me!" ~the lovely and talented Miss Julia Roberts~



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    Elite Member CornFlakegrl's Avatar
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    "It's probably for the best." Darwin.
    if you're so incensed that you can't fly your penis in public take it up with your state, arrange a nude protest, go and be the rosa parks of cocks or something - witchcurlgirl

  7. #7
    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    maybe I'm mis-remembering but I thought I recalled her commenting on her *personal habits* in colorful ways.

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    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Hope he came before he went.
    stef, Bluebonnet, panic and 5 others like this.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

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    Elite Member Trixie's Avatar
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    ^ They should put that on his tombstone! "He came and went"
    effie2, Bluebonnet, BITTER and 4 others like this.
    These people don't give a fuck about YOU or us. It's a message board, for Christ's sake. ~ mrs.v ~
    ~"Fuck off! Aim higher! Get a life! Get away from me!" ~the lovely and talented Miss Julia Roberts~



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    Elite Member panic's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greysfang View Post
    Hope he came before he went.
    "His suits are cheaply made because he makes them in other countries, taking jobs away from good, hard-working Americans."...Bevy Smith on Donald Trump

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    Elite Member sprynkles's Avatar
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    I am imaging seeing a half naked man with a boner flying out of a sunroof. It's sad, but kind of funny.
    lindsaywhit, BITTER and Wilson like this.

    Meryl doesn't even try anymore. She just calls Lanvin and asks for curtains with a belt.~Bitter
    Can we interest you in Leann Rimes? She has a nice little cadre of fans you'd probably enjoy.~ Pecan Pie

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    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    If you watched Jackass then you've seen it before.
    SHELLEE likes this.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

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    I was surprised and a bit disappointed that this didn't happen in Florida.

    I wonder if the manner of death will be mentioned in the eulogy? I think I need Mo to write that eulogy.
    Grammar: The difference between knowing your shit and knowing you're shit.

  14. #14
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    No, this is more Brookie's people. For once.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

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    Elite Member Brookie's Avatar
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    That's my town! Honestly, I can't read anything about this without breaking into the giggles. Can you imagine his family greeting people at his funeral? "How did he die?"
    Wilson, SHELLEE and lindsaywhit like this.
    Life is short. Break the Rules. Forgive Quickly. Kiss Slowly. Love Truly.
    Laugh Uncontrollably. And never regret ANYTHING that makes you smile.

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