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Thread: Gay Man Arrested At Hospital After Refusing To Leave Bedridden Partner

  1. #1
    Elite Member Seth82's Avatar
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    Default Gay Man Arrested At Hospital After Refusing To Leave Bedridden Partner

    Gay Man Arrested At Hospital After Refusing To Leave Bedridden Partner / Queerty



    A Missouri man was arrested and served with a restraining order after he refused to leave the bedside of his ailing partner.

    Roger Gorley (far right) of Lee’s Summit went to visit his husband, Allen, at Research Medical Center on Tuesday afternoon. When he got there, a member of Allen’s family asked him to leave and when Gorley refused, hospital security forcibly removed him in handcuffs.


    “I was not recognized as being the husband, I wasn’t recognized as being the partner,” Gorley told Kansas City’s Fox 4 News.


    Though Missouri does not legally recognize them as a couple, according to Gorley, he and Allen have been in a civil union for nearly five years and make medical decisions for each other. Gorley also asserts that the nurse on duty refused to verify that the two men share joint power of attorney.


    “She didn’t even bother to go look it up to check into it,” Gorley said. “He’s been at the psychiatric unit part several times.”


    Research Medical Center said it does not discriminate based on sexual orientation or race and released the following statement:

    We believe involving the family is an important part of the patient care process. And, the patient`s needs are always our first priority. When anyone becomes disruptive to providing the necessary patient care, we involve our security team to help calm the situation and to protect our patients and staff. If the situation continues to escalate, we have no choice but to request police assistance.

    Though President Obama extended hospital visitation rights to same-sex partners in 2010, Roger Gorley cannot visit his husband Allen thanks to the restraining order.

    “All we want is equal rights,” he said.



    Quote Originally Posted by Kat Scorp View Post
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    Elite Member Kittylady's Avatar
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    Fucking cunts. Let the man be with his loved one.
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    Elite Member McJag's Avatar
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    I don't see how they can ignore a legal medical directive even had he been a neighbor! This is troubling.
    And how could his own family send his own partner away? This ain't right on many levels.
    Seth82 likes this.
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    Elite Member MontanaMama's Avatar
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    Absolutely doesn't matter if they're in a relationship or not, if Allen named Roger as his duly appointed power of attorney for medical purposes, that nurse and family member can go pound salt until Jesus hisself comes down and slaps them silly. Cannot violate the patient's express written wishes/appointment. Fuck 'em all.
    McJag, laynes and C_is_for_Cookie like this.
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    Elite Member Seth82's Avatar
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    yep I thought a Power of Attorney trumps the family's decision making?
    Quote Originally Posted by Kat Scorp View Post
    My fellow 1982 Scorpion! Never occurred to me that penises go into ears until your twitpics
    @NickoMoralesXXX
    @Sexy_Seth_1982 awe sexy! You're just too cute to be true- I can't take my eyes off of you-

  6. #6
    Elite Member McJag's Avatar
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    I hope he sues them right into the ground! We will hear much more about this case.
    I didn't start out to collect diamonds, but somehow they just kept piling up.-Mae West

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    Elite Member Lalique's Avatar
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    Jesus. So infuriating. I hope Allen dumps his shitty family.
    Seth82 likes this.
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    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    I hope he sues the fuck out of them.
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    Elite Member gas_chick's Avatar
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    Super awesome family that would put further trauma on an ailing person by having their partner arrested in front of them in a hospital. So much bullshit. Gay marriage should be legal for so many reasons and this is a big one.
    I am going to come and burn the fucking house down... but you will blow me first."

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    Elite Member Kathie_Moffett's Avatar
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    Kansas. *sigh*
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    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    Actually, Missouri. But Kansas is just as bad.
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    Elite Member Seth82's Avatar
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    here's a more detailed report

    What Actually Happened To That Same-Sex Couple In The Missouri Hospital | ThinkProgress

    What Actually Happened To That Same-Sex Couple In The Missouri Hospital



    There has been a lot of speculation as to what actually transpired when Roger Gorley was arrested away from his husband Allen’s bedside in a Missouri hospital earlier this week. Despite the fact Roger and Allen have granted each other power of attorney for medical decisions, the Research Medical Center claimed that Roger was “disruptive and belligerent,” arguing that is why the police arrested him and removed him from the facility.
    Now, Roger’s daughter Amanda has shared a detailed account of what transpired that paints a picture even more offensive than many may have imagined. The full account can be read hereas well as some additional details she shared in an interview with blogger John Aravosis. Here is a breakdown of the family’s circumstances and what transpired in that hospital room according to Amanda:
    The Couple’s Background

    • Allen suffers from severe depression and is currently undergoing electro-shock treatment (ECT) twice a month because his medications are no longer allowing him to function normally.
    • Allen has specifically excluded his family from having any say over his medical decisions because they have not been understanding of the impact of his depression.
    • Not only have Roger and Allen granted each other power of attorney, but they are known throughout the hospital as a proud gay couple because they are regularly there for Allen’s treatments.
    • Allen’s family has not been supportive of his relationship with Roger.

    How Allen Was Admitted On Tuesday

    • Amanda was taking care of Allen while Roger was at work at Tuesday, but when they returned home from a few errands, Allen’s brother Lee and sister Pat were waiting at the door with paramedics and police.
    • Due to Allen’s sluggish state, the police determined he was a “danger to himself” and decided to take him to the hospital against his will. Rather than taking him to St. Luke’s Hospital in Lee’s Summit, the local hospital where his regular doctors are, they took him to the Research Medical Center in Kansas City, which he only goes to for his ECT. They ignored Amanda’s attempts to explain Allen’s medical needs and procedures.
    • Amanda called her father, Roger, and urged him to get to Allen’s side immediately. When he arrived at the hospital, Lee was also there.

    The Family Confrontation

    • Lee asserted that he was not going to allow Roger to make decisions for Allen and that he would instead. This enraged Roger, who replied, “No you won’t! This is my husband. I know what he wants and needs. You are never around. You need to leave.”
    • The nurse informed Roger that because of his agitated state, he needed to leave. When he explained that he intended to stay with his husband, she replied, “I know who you two are. You need to leave.” Refusing to acknowledge their legal relationship, she called the police to have Roger forcibly removed.
    • Allen, who was in and out of consciousness, objected as he was able, saying, “I want him here.”
    • A follow-up story from Fox 4 suggests that Roger and Lee were having a loud fight, but doesn’t otherwise contradict this account.

    The Violent Arrest

    • The Kansas City police ordered Roger to leave, and when he did not comply, they considered this a refusal to cooperate and began to forcibly remove him. When Roger refused to let go of the gurney’s railing, an officer began karate chopping his wrists to get him to release.
    • The police then wrestled Roger to ground, knocking his glasses off his face, his hearing aids out of his ears, and nearly breaking his wrist in the process. They put a knee to his back and wrenched his wrists around to arrest him. They changed his handcuffs four different times.
    • The police assumed because Roger is gay that he must have HIV. The brutal struggle had drawn blood, and one officer was so disturbed that he insisted on using gloves to handle Roger and refused to even take back his handcuffs.

    The Aftermath

    • It took three hours to process Roger at the station and bail him out of jail.
    • He was fined $600 for disorderly conduct and trespassing. Fox4 confirmed this from a police report.
    • According to Amanda’s account, he was also issued a restraining order prohibiting him from stepping foot on the hospital grounds to see his husband.
    • Later, the hospital finally asked Lee to leave as well, at Allen’s request.

    The hospital’s statement on Thursday claimed that there was no restraining order, and according to Amanda’s last update, this was the first information indicating Roger could see Allen again since his arrest on Tuesday. Aravosis confirms via Amanda that the hospital did allow Roger back in to see his husband Thursday night, but only after he “showed up and threw a fit.” She says her family is considering its options and has been talking with the local ACLU as they plan a response. Federal officials are similarly gathering evidence and intent to respond “in a speedy manner.”
    With these details, both the hospital’s and police’s actions seem more suspect, not less. At the foundation of the story remains the fact that Roger and Allen’s relationship was treated as inferior. Because they did not have a state-recognized marriage, they were regarded as legal strangers despite even having set up the available legal protections for each other. Roger, in turn, was subjected not just to discrimination but police brutality and legal consequences. This tragic story speaks volumes about the consequences of continuing to deny same-sex couples the right to marry and how they continue to be treated as second-class citizens. Notably, not one conservative organization has mentioned this story since it broke.
    Quote Originally Posted by Kat Scorp View Post
    My fellow 1982 Scorpion! Never occurred to me that penises go into ears until your twitpics
    @NickoMoralesXXX
    @Sexy_Seth_1982 awe sexy! You're just too cute to be true- I can't take my eyes off of you-

  13. #13
    Elite Member BITTER's Avatar
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    This shit makes me so angry, my blood is boiling.

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    Elite Member ConstanceSpry's Avatar
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    Unbelievable, this guy needs to cut off his family as soon as he has recovered, plus get a restraining order against them.
    Seth82 and C_is_for_Cookie like this.
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    Elite Member Brookie's Avatar
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    I'd have my attorney conveniently inquire about a lawsuit against the hospital as well - even if it's just a bluff. This is shameful.
    shedevilang, stef and Seth82 like this.
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