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Thread: Woman Buys a Box of Tampons, Discovers They Come with Free Cocaine

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    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    Default Woman Buys a Box of Tampons, Discovers They Come with Free Cocaine

    Boxes of tampons aren't usually like Cracker Jacks, where you expect to find a prize inside. But one woman in Utah recently discovered that her tampons came with an added bonus of some free cocaine. Anybody ready for a period party? Umm, yeah, not so much. Anyway, after purchasing a sealed box of tampons at a local salvage store in Salt Lake City, Cindy Davidson opened it and saw that some of the tampons inside had been altered. Specifically, they'd taken out the tampon and packed the applicator with a white powdery substance wrapped in cellophane. The cellophane was so tightly taped that Cindy couldn't get it open and didn't know what was inside. She was going to wait until the next day to call the manufacturer, but then she thought better of it: "I started getting nervous because I thought it might have been a terrorist attack." Attack of the terrorist tampon!

    She called the police instead, who sent a hazmat team. They quickly determined that they were dealing with good old-fashioned cocaine, which some clever smuggler had clearly been trying to move. Somewhere the plan must have gotten off track, because his product ended up in Cindy's house instead. The police are investigating, and the store has pulled the rest of the brand's boxes from the shelf. Cindy still can't quite believe this happened to her. She said, "I really couldn't wrap my head around it. It was just crazy to me." As crazy as it is, it could have been a lot crazier, like if she hadn't noticed the applicator was chock full of coke BEFORE inserting it into her body.


    Woman Buys a Box of Tampons, Discovers They Come with Free Cocaine
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    Elite Member faithanne's Avatar
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    I wonder how absorbent cocaine is?
    "You're going to die tomorrow, Lord Bolton. Sleep well."



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    Elite Member SHELLEE's Avatar
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    Lucky bitch, I'm wasting all my time looking off the dock for square groupers, only to find out that I can find coke in my tampons. Who would have thought.
    witchcurlgirl and Seapharris7 like this.
    See, Whores, we are good for something. Love, Florida
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    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    uterine coke freeze must be great for cramps.
    sluce likes this.
    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


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    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Jackpot!
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

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    Elite Member nancydrew's Avatar
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    And what brand was this? *changes shopping list*
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    Elite Member msdeb's Avatar
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    is a salvage store like a 99 cent store?
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    Elite Member SHELLEE's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by witchcurlgirl View Post
    uterine coke freeze must be great for cramps.
    Great idea, but I'm not sure that I want to share even with my uterus.
    Quote Originally Posted by msdeb View Post
    is a salvage store like a 99 cent store?
    I didn't even catch that. Who would buy tampons in that type of store, well besides me now?
    See, Whores, we are good for something. Love, Florida
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    Elite Member OrangeSlice's Avatar
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    There's usually nothing wrong with items in a salvage store. It's usually name-brand items from a regular store that have gotten damaged (crushed box, torn box, etc.) or discontinued (or even switched out for newer packaging). That's how I got a crapload of Cascade, Tide, and ALL pods for $1 a bag, just like new in original packaging. I would imagine that much coke absorbed in the hooha would be enough to OD.
    "Schadenfreude, hard to spell, easy to feel." ~VenusinFauxFurs

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    Elite Member Trixie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by msdeb View Post
    is a salvage store like a 99 cent store?
    Not sure, but I don't think so. When I was a kid, there was a salvage store by my cousin's house that we loved to go to. It was stuff from train or truck shipments that had been refused by customers after being damaged in transit. Since the delivering company has to then pay for the shipment, they're entitled to salvage what they can. My guess, the "tampons" were smuggled in on a truck maybe and never made it to their intended destination for whatever reason.
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    Elite Member Brookie's Avatar
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    Yep, occasionally I can find stuff like toilet paper and paper towels at the Salvation Army. I always take advantage of it if it's not too beat up.
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    Elite Member Chilly Willy's Avatar
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    Not fair.
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    Elite Member WhateverLolaWants's Avatar
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    I *think* I've told this story in here, but just in case i haven't...

    Some weenie guy was hitting on me back in college and he's like, "You like coke? I've got coke. Have you ever had a guy go down on you with coke on his tongue?"

    I couldn't help but laugh, "No, I've never let a guy put a topical anesthetic on my clit with his tongue!" LOL, numb mouth + numb clit = wtf?
    Seapharris7 likes this.
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    Elite Member Seapharris7's Avatar
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    Well, tampons are good for Vodka....
    Sugar... The real gateway drug

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    Elite Member SHELLEE's Avatar
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    okay, wut?
    See, Whores, we are good for something. Love, Florida
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