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Thread: Mariah Carey Reveals New Album Title, Cover for Me. I Am Mariah…The Elusive Chanteuse

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    Elite Member Honey's Avatar
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    Default Mariah Carey Reveals New Album Title, Cover for Me. I Am Mariah…The Elusive Chanteuse






    CORRECTION: That headline is dead wrong, because that technological wonder of an album cover is beyond Photoshop’s capabilities. That headline should read: Me. I am CGI’d. That’s better and much more factually correct.
    The horny butterfly announced her 14th album last night and everything about it is ridiculous and one hundred percent Mimi from the fairy tale version of herself on that velvet painting cover to the title to the video explaining the title. It can only come from the Mr. Sketch-huffing 12-year-old trapped inside of Mimi. That cover must be what Mimi sees when she looks in the mirror, which makes sense since every mirror in her house is a Fun House mirror that stretches her legs into another dimension and makes her feets look bigger than Wonky McValtrex’s hooves. Mimi should really trademark that “sucking in and smelling my pits” pose since it’s her signature. The title is equally as ridiculous. The title is:

    Me. I Am…. The Elusive Chanteuse

    THE ELUSIVE CHANTEUSE!!!


    What in Word For A Day calendar ridiculousness is that?! That sounds like the sub-title for the least popular Nancy Drew mystery. It sounds like the name of a Mary-Kate and Ashley Olsen straight-to-video detective movie from 1994. The Elusive Chanteuse is Carmen Sandiego’s arch rival. The words “elusive” and “chanteuse” (or “SHAWN-TOOS” as Mimi pronounces it) should never be used to describe her. The “elusive clothes wearer,” yes. The “batshit insane chanteuse,” definitely. But not the elusive chanteuse.
    In a video explaining that title, Mimi says that people have been calling her that lately and by people she means the minions who were told by her to refer to her as the “elusive chanteuse” from now on. Mimi also says in the video that the she got the “Me. I Am” part from a self-portrait she drew of herself when she was 3. You know she totally drew that last week. The pack of Reds was a nice touch.



    Dlisted | Me. I Am Photoshopped.

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    Elite Member *DIVA!'s Avatar
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    That's album cover has been photoshopped to death
    Baltimore O's ​Fan!

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    Elite Member Air Quotes's Avatar
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    We. We know. We know this.
    "A true whore just loves her life." - Sluce

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    Hit By Ban Bus! rockchick's Avatar
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    This is hilarious!

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    Super Moderator Tati's Avatar
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    aBWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH AHAHA!
    If you reveal your secrets to the wind you should not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees.

    - Kahlil Gibran

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    Elite Member kasippu's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Air Quotes View Post
    We. We know. We know this.

    Nooooo, I am pretty sure she looks like this.

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    Elite Member msdeb's Avatar
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    the elusive chanteuse. LOLOL
    Basic rule of Gossip Rocks: Don't be a dick.Tati
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    Elite Member Laurent's Avatar
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    Mariah, the deluded moose.

    Girl, sit down. You look like the love child of Shakira and Michael Jackson on that cover.
    Air Quotes and BITTER like this.
    “What are you looking at, sugar-tits?” - Mel Gibson

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    Bronze Member Hades's Avatar
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    Why the need for so much Photoshop? This was MC 10 years ago..2 special kids and a homie the clown marriage later and she/her PR are still doing too much.

    They Photoshop-ed her on EoMi when she looked fine irl..So maybe this is her request?

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    Elite Member arie_skop's Avatar
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    I am sure Mariah wants her body to be photoshopped like this. Her waist isnt that small
    Last edited by arie_skop; May 20th, 2014 at 12:44 AM.

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    Elite Member darksithbunny's Avatar
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    She looks like she has to pee really bad.

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    Elite Member Karistiona's Avatar
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    Leave Moo Moo A LONE!!! She is a goddess and she's wonderful and you're all just jealous!
    I smile because I have no idea what's going on

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    Elite Member Mel1973's Avatar
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    ohhhhh moomoo kitty fuck, WHYYYYY!?
    Kill him.
    Kill her.
    Kill It.
    Kill everything... that IS the solution!
    П(•_•)П
    twitchy molests my signature!

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    Elite Member gas_chick's Avatar
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    Her body ain't looked like that since the 90's.
    I am going to come and burn the fucking house down... but you will blow me first."

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    Elite Member Tiny Pixie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by arie_skop View Post
    I am sure Mariah wants her body to be photoshopped like this. Her waist isnt that small
    Her nothing is that small !
    arie_skop likes this.
    Fluctuat nec mergitur
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