Results 1 to 13 of 13

Thread: Rock's shortest stars (5' 8" and under)

  1. #1
    Elite Member celeb_2006's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    13,468

    Default Rock's shortest stars (5' 8" and under)

    Rock's Short List (5' 8" and Under) - GetBack

    The world's a cruel place for a short dude. Barred from basketball, left off firefighter shortlists, and unable to ride Space Mountain, his life is a never-ending "you must be this tall to ride" sign.

    Music is the only place a short dude can go for salvation. While most athletic teams, branches of the armed forces, and theme parks have height requirements, bands do not. A 5-foot-tall dude may never be starting guard for the Lakers, but there's nothing preventing him from shredding a solo at Madison Square Garden. He may get overlooked at the McDonald's counter trying to order a Happy Meal, but he's always 10 feet tall on the JumboTron.

    Some say short dudes compensate for their lack of height by becoming overachievers or hostile. Or both. It's not my job to psychoanalyze just to lay out some selectively chosen facts that make my case the way I want.

    So I present you with Rock's Short List. Randy Newman was wrong. Short people DO have reason to live. It's rock 'n' roll.

    GALLERY: See the entire rock short list


    Prince (5' 2")
    One of the most diminutive musicians around, Prince makes up for his height by wearing high heels, playing every instrument on his recordings, and making sure none of his women are taller than him - and wear flats.





    John Mellencamp (5' 7")
    The former Johnny Cougar fits the profile of an angry short dude. He was arrested at age eight for breaking and entering, started his first band at 14, and lost a college job for using profanity. To complicate the theory, though, his wife is supermodel Elaine Irwin, who stands at 5 feet 11 inches.






    Bono (5' 7 1/2")
    Bono is the classic overachiever. He's determined to be in the biggest rock band in the world, save said world, and receive all of its accolades (he's the only person to be nominated for an Academy Award, Golden Globe, Grammy, and Nobel Peace Prize). If the dude was 6 feet 1 inches tall, we wouldn't know who he is.





    Thom Yorke (5' 5 1/4")
    The Radiohead singer's height is overshadowed by another physical trait: his left eye, which was closed shut at birth. Yorke underwent five operations by the time he was six to correct it. He was left with a drooping eyelid.





    Angus Young (5' 2")
    The 54-year-old AC/DC guitarist has played the instrument since he was five. And he's dressed in a schoolboy uniform the whole time. It's the perfect way to get people to ignore your adolescent height: just dress like a kid.






    Roger Daltrey (5' 7")
    Within The Who, Daltrey had a reputation for quickly punching anyone who disagreed with him, including the 6-foot-tall Pete Townshend. He also gets around the height issue by swinging his microphone around his head onstage. It adds a couple feet at least.





    Ronnie James Dio (5' 4")
    Dio sings so loudly and looks so satanic that no one would notice his elfin height. That is, unless you paid attention to some of those early band names, like Electric Elves and Elf. Those were unfortunate.






    Iggy Pop (5' 7 1/2")
    Iggy's bare-chested stage antics distract from any height issues his fans may possess. Between the self-mutilation, stage-diving, and self-exposure, who's counting inches (no pun intended)?






    Paul Simon (5' 3")
    Simon and his duo partner, Art Garfunkel, have famously feuded for more than 40 years. Some say the tension was caused by Garfunkel's acting career. Others say it was Art's jealousy of Simon's solo success. I say it's Simon being overshadowed by a dude who's 6 feet tall - 6 feet 5 inches with the Jewfro.





    Bob Marley (5' 7")
    The Rastaman was proof that big things come in small packages. Marley is as close to a musical deity as you can get. He had a sound and a message that transcended mere mortals. And with his lion's mane of dreadlocks, you'd think you were standing in front of a giant.

  2. #2
    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Acerbia
    Posts
    33,489

    Default

    they left off:

    Mark Bolan

    Van Morrison

    Graham Parker

    Ian Dury

    Glen Danzig

    Stevie Nicks (less than 5')

    and a fun fact about Angus Young: his older brother George was in The Easybeats, who had a huge hit with 'Friday On My Mind'

    Heres a list of tall ones:

    Mick Fleetwood
    John Entwistle
    Clarence Clemons
    Randy Newman (he wrote that song for a reason)
    Todd Rundgren
    Long John Baldry
    Teddy Pendergrass
    Bryan Ferry
    Ric Ocasek
    Carly Simon (gotta have a girl)
    It's no longer a dog whistle, it's a fucking trombone


    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


    If I wanted the government in my womb I'd fuck a Senator

  3. #3
    Elite Member Charmed Hour's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Posts
    5,032

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by witchcurlgirl View Post
    they left off:

    Stevie Nicks (less than 5')
    My sister and I met Stevie. She was wearing flats, I'd put her at about 5'2". I'm 5'4" and my sister barely squeeks in at 5'. I didn't tower over her and she was noticeably taller than my sister.

  4. #4
    Elite Member sparkly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2007
    Location
    Exchanging glances with the cunty bitches
    Posts
    14,422

    Default

    ^Was she nice?

    I'd never date a guy who was 5'2"
    Sorry, they need to be tall.
    Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.

  5. #5
    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Acerbia
    Posts
    33,489

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Charmed Hour View Post
    My sister and I met Stevie. She was wearing flats, I'd put her at about 5'2". I'm 5'4" and my sister barely squeeks in at 5'. I didn't tower over her and she was noticeably taller than my sister.

    I stand corrected...no pun intended...her bio's state she's 5'1"
    It's no longer a dog whistle, it's a fucking trombone


    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


    If I wanted the government in my womb I'd fuck a Senator

  6. #6
    Elite Member holly's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    Texas
    Posts
    6,167

    Default

    I didn't realize how short some of these guys are! I had no idea Angus Young is the same height as Prince (& me ) I also didn't know Thom Yorke & Ronnie James Dio were such shorties either.
    5'7" is short for a guy, but it's not so short that you feel bad for the guys.

  7. #7
    Elite Member Sundance's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Posts
    3,468

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by sparkly View Post
    ^Was she nice?

    I'd never date a guy who was 5'2"
    Sorry, they need to be tall.
    I was always like that too, which is kinda sad since I'm really short. I would never date a guy even near my height. The taller the better.

  8. #8
    Gold Member
    Join Date
    Dec 2008
    Posts
    1,257

    Default

    Not a fan of short men , i'm tall and would love to date a tall man one day. Shame they always like shortarse women

  9. #9
    Friend of Gossip Rocks! buttmunch's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Uranus
    Posts
    31,885

    Default

    Ronnie James Dio (5' 4")
    Dio sings so loudly and looks so satanic that no one would notice his elfin height. That is, unless you paid attention to some of those early band names, like Electric Elves and Elf. Those were unfortunate.

    That dude is one angry little midget.

    As far as short men...well, I prefer them taller than me but I do have to say that I dated a shorty once and, well, let's just say he was gifted in other areas.
    'Those who sacrifice liberty for security deserve neither.' Ben Franklin

    "When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying the cross."
    --Sinclair Lewis

  10. #10
    Elite Member PinkCadillac's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2006
    Location
    UK
    Posts
    2,434

    Default

    I didnt know Stevie Nicks was so short

  11. #11
    Elite Member Lobelia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    a backwards hillbilly state
    Posts
    20,801

    Default

    Isn't Billy Idol really short, too?
    "I've cautiously embraced jeggings"
    Emma Peel aka Pacific Breeze aka Wilde1 aka gogodancer aka maribou

    Yip, yip, yip in your tiny indignation. Bark furiously on, lady dog.

  12. #12
    Elite Member msdeb's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2006
    Location
    in a van down by the river
    Posts
    39,431

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by witchcurlgirl View Post
    Clarence Clemons
    seriously? I had NO idea he was short!
    Basic rule of Gossip Rocks: Don't be a dick.Tati
    Lighten Up Francis WCG

  13. #13
    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2007
    Location
    Acerbia
    Posts
    33,489

    Default

    ^ No -he's tall...i made a list of tall ones to go with the shrimp list
    It's no longer a dog whistle, it's a fucking trombone


    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


    If I wanted the government in my womb I'd fuck a Senator

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. World's shortest man, leggiest woman meet
    By celeb_2006 in forum News
    Replies: 4
    Last Post: September 16th, 2008, 08:26 PM
  2. The World's Shortest Personality Test
    By nycgirl in forum Laughs and Oddities
    Replies: 17
    Last Post: September 24th, 2007, 04:57 PM
  3. Replies: 0
    Last Post: July 13th, 2007, 09:43 AM
  4. Pixie Geldof in world's shortest dress.....
    By TheMoog in forum Gossip Archive
    Replies: 30
    Last Post: April 19th, 2007, 11:31 AM
  5. Shortest fairytale - EVER!!
    By Tiara in forum Laughs and Oddities
    Replies: 1
    Last Post: December 2nd, 2005, 02:04 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •