Celebrity marriages doomed for failure?

[moomies]

6 Celebrity Marriages That May Not Last
Weddings should symbolize a lasting union. So why do celebrities go through marriages as often as they change their socks?

Love is in the air. but only until the reeking stench of divorce overpowers it, which in Hollywood usually wafts in around one year or so — 55 hours if your name is Britney.

I'm getting distracted. We're talking love here, aren't we? Summer love! And who better to inspire those meaningless lust and sun-stroke fuelled relationships that only last long enough for your tan to fade than a bevy of beauties from Hollywood and beyond who all tied the knot in the past year.
Avril Lavigne and Deryck Whibley
A.K.A. Mr. And Mrs. Tweeny-Bop CanRock.
Where: A Montecito, California estate with friends and family from Ontario.
When: July 15, 2006
Why: She needed a skater boy and he needed a high-profile rocker girl with more celebrity clout than his smushy face could ever command. He's an aspiring mole rat, you see.

What the?! Come on, Avril! Where were the black and white striped princess gloves? Your dress was lame. And so is broadcasting to the press that you are changing your image from punk rocker to girly-girl. Change is supposed to be observed (think Madonna) not forced upon the masses who used to think Chanel could make anyone look good.
Nicole Kidman and Keith Urban
A.K.A. Mr. And Mrs. Hollywood down-under
Where: A sandstone chapel overlooking Sidney Harbor
When: June 25, 2006
Why: In Urban's vows he promised to remain non-freaky and un-scientologist. The couple also has an excellent height ratio.

What the?! At Urban's first concert since getting hitched, poor little Canadian country singer Shelly Rastin couldn't get into her own trailer because Kidman had the perimeter "locked down" against having her photo taken (Gasp! People might find out what she looks like!). I wonder if Urban knows he's married an agoraphobic porcelain doll.
Lisa Marie Presley and Michael Lockwood
A.K.A. Mrs. Fifth Time's the Charm and Mr. Oh What the Hell
Where: Kyoto, Japan
When: January 22, 2006
Why: Maybe if Presley marries her producer, he'll do the work of ten thousand men and a genie and also get her music career to take off from its endless runway towards the depths of hell.

What the?! The wedding ceremony was performed in traditional Japanese style - you know, something close to their roots. Presley's such a down-to-earth girl, except for that whole skeletal Prince-of-Pop-and-"Jesus Juice" affair. No one can say she has an Oedipus complex.
Pink and Carey Jason Hart
A.K.A. The cheesiest tattooed couple in history
Where: A beach in Costa Rica
When: January 2, 2006
Why: When you tattoo "Tru Luv" on your wrist, you become hideously unattractive to anyone else without "Tru Luv" tattooed on their wrist as well as to anyone who can spell.

What the?! Pink, in true rocked-out women's lib fashion, proposed to Hart by holding up a sign in the crowd that said "Will you marry me" while he was competing in a motocross race. Was she trying to bring about his bloody and horrific death? The tough-girl image only works while your boy's alive, Pink.
Ben Harper and Laura Dern
A.K.A. Mr. and Mrs. marginal Hollywood intelligentsia
Where: Their home in Los Angeles.
When: December 23, 2005
Why: He sings hippie songs; she stars in a movie called "Happy Endings". What more do you need?

What the?! My thoughts exactly. Also, Harper has a devastatingly sexy voice, and Dern's well. not.
Eminem and Kimberly Mathers
A.K.A. Give love a(nother) chance.
Where: Rochester, Michigan
When: January 14, 2006
Why: The man who sported a red plastic bum in one of his videos just can't seem to leave the trailer park behind. The ex-Mrs. Slim Shady can't seem to leave that red plastic bum worth millions behind (smart girl).

What the?! I suppose Rochester, Michigan is a beautiful place to those who know it well. Um, where is it again?

___________________________________
go ahead, take a whiff
There's nothing like dysfunctional millionaire unions destined for failure to make you take a second, more penetrating look at your current sweetie. If he or she isn't a) a serial bride, b) a particularly fragile descendant of convicts and murders (Australian, in case you didn't know your colonial history), or c) a pint-sized, punk-rock dress-up doll, then feel free to continue your tryst with joyful abandon. Just watch that tan.

source:
http://lifestyle.sympatico.msn.ca/Re...MayNotLast.htm

[pacific breeze]

I think their failure rate is about the same as the rest of us -- 50 per cent -- but they get a lot more publicity.

[Grimmlok]

Jennifer Aniston and... anybody.

[Raspberry gashes]

Marriages are hard work as it is, but having the media on your back would only add to the pressure.

[Laurent]

Pink and Carey Jason Hart

I gotta say I hope they make it. He seems like a sweet guy & I thought her marriage proposal to him was cute.

[Goose]

I thought Eminem and Kim Mathers already crashed and burned on their upteenth attempt at marriage at the beginning of the year? Didn't it only last like a month? Or did they give it yet another go?

[silver024]

Originally Posted by Goose

I thought Eminem and Kim Mathers already crashed and burned on their upteenth attempt at marriage at the beginning of the year? Didn't it only last like a month? Or did they give it yet another go?

i believe they did call it quits...AGAIN...i think its like their 3rd time too...enough already...they obviously cant make it together

[nana55]

Laura Dern and Ben Harper have been married awhile already and have 2 kids. I don't see it ending soon. Everybody else will divorce within the year.

[SammysMom]

Lisa Marie Presley and Michael Lockwood
A.K.A. Mrs. Fifth Time's the Charm and Mr. Oh What the Hell
Where: Kyoto, Japan
When: January 22, 2006
Why: Maybe if Presley marries her producer, he'll do the work of ten thousand men and a genie and also get her music career to take off from its endless runway towards the depths of hell.

What the?! The wedding ceremony was performed in traditional Japanese style - you know, something close to their roots. Presley's such a down-to-earth girl, except for that whole skeletal Prince-of-Pop-and-"Jesus Juice" affair. No one can say she has an Oedipus complex

She got married again??? Damn I didnt know that She is giving Liz Taylor a run for her money

[Elisa]

I really love Nicole and Keith together and I think they'll make it. I mean - Nicole was married before for 10 years and that's a record by Hollywood standards. (Granted she probably would have stayed with Tom longer if he hadn't decided to dump her ass just before the clock struck 10 years!)

[Sleuth]

I think celebrities make a mockery of marriage. Its annoying when a celeb leaves their current spouse to hook up with someone else and 2-3 months later they are proclaiming their ever dying love to them , popping out babies and married. and then are shocked when the marriage ends a year later. im sick of celebrities messing around with marriage like its a trendy seasonal fad.

[sweetjane999]

I am beginning to think that all the ones that 'make it' are all fake or contracted...

[moomies]

Yea I agree ^^ and a lot of them seem like publicity stunts, too even when they just get engaged (which doesn't necessarily lead to marriage).

[PrettyGirl]

Lisa Marie Presley's been married 4 times not 5.

Danny Keough
Michael Jackson
Nicolas Cage
Michael Lockwood

Her first marriage lasted a while...she was pretty much out of the public eye then...just having kids. Then she married Jacko and I think that marriage thrusted her in the public eye. She has admitted to that being her big mistake--what was she thinking?! She even says it.

With Nic Cage, I think she was in love with him. That marriage ended because they got into a fight and he filed for divorce just like that...3 months later. He sounded like a real jerk--super impulsive and he tossed her engagement ring in the ocean once. What an idiot. So, he was the one who ended that and given his history from his marriage to Patricia Arquette, he wasn't going to make it with anyone. So, I don't think that marriage ending was really her fault. Nic was an a-hole and a wacko.

Michael Lockwood, I believe, is her last ditch effort to find happiness. I think she got tired of celebrities (after Jacko and Nicolas) and seems to want to settle down with a 'nobody' since she had better luck with someone relatively unknown the first time around. Lisa Marie doesn't strike me as some flutterbug or some girl who needs a man like J.Lo....and I don't think she's the type that dumps someone because someone better looking comes around (like J.Lo again). I think Lisa Marie really has had bad luck in love...and to top it off she seems to not take people's crap. That can be really intimidating to men, especially if you're rich and your dad was the biggest entertainer of this century. It must not be easy at all when you have so much money, I'm sure you question people's sincerity. I know I would. I'd worry who really loved me for me or because I have a pretty good bank account to my name? That would be tough.

[SammysMom]

Now I would be totally shocked possibly have a stroke if Gwen & Gavin split up.