A pseudo-blind item from Ted C about TomKat...any ideas?

Bellatheball · April 10th, 2006, 01:44 PM

From Ted C on eonline:

http://www.eonline.com/Gossip/Awful/...06/060410.html

Quote:

Yep, you read right. While I hear Cedars Sinai--the little-bundle delivery station to the flamboyant stars (everybody from Madonna to Debbie Rowe has given it up there)--stands by at full Katie Alert (in addition to the Beverly Hills pad that's been practically hermetically sealed at this point. Hmmm, we'll see), I have the most interesting little dish. In code, 'course. What the hell else do you expect in this missive? So, read on, already!

(Shows a photo of Katie looking at a shoe while shopping)

It's time for me to dig up the couture crystal ball. Katie Holmes, you are shopping in Beverly Hills. You are without your fiancé, Tom Cruise. Now, let me close my eyes and try to hear your inner monologue. Yes, terrific! I got it! Here goes: "Hello, shoe. I like you, shoe. You have a big heel, and I have a big belly. Shoe, say hello to belly. Hello, belly! Hello, shoe! I hope my big sunglasses don't fall on you. Please, no. Belly says, 'I am coming to get you, big sparkly shoe!' Bad belly. Big belly says, 'I like my shirt. I am a plebian. No, I am not. I like money. Did Michelle Williams get as big as me? I don't think she did. I am hungry. I want vitamins. I want teddy bears and soccer games! I want to eat a teddy bear.' Cutie coif then adds, 'I don't look like a soccer mom. I like my hair in a bun. I feel like I Dream of Jeannie, but I don't dream of Jeannie. I dream of Tom..."

Any idea what this is supposed to mean? I'm never good and figuring out Ted's hints.

LynnieD · April 10th, 2006, 01:57 PM

Is Ted on fucking drugs seriously??

If I read that 100 times, I would still have no idea what the hell he was talking about, in code.
HOWEVER, here is what I think, just after reading it once:

Katie likes money---so she's being paid/under contract for this little 'miracle'.
AND she's obviously on some sort of 'vitamins' since she is cannot stop smiling and is a total freak show.

Bellatheball · April 10th, 2006, 09:38 PM

Thanks Lynnie. I read it a ton of times too and couldn't understand why she's talking to her shoe. Seriously? WTF? I suppose with Thetan Tom being so letiginous, he needs to speak in code.

MrsDark · April 10th, 2006, 10:16 PM

Stepford Wife Robotspeak? It sounds like they're working out the *bugs* in her programming.

CherryDarling · April 10th, 2006, 10:45 PM

What...the...HELL does that mean?!?!?!

Lobelia · April 10th, 2006, 10:56 PM

Well, plebeian is misspelled. At this point, I'm nit-picking out of desperation. I really want to know what this means.

ekee · April 10th, 2006, 11:47 PM

i NEVER understand Ted.

SVZ · April 11th, 2006, 02:16 AM

He's passing off lack of writing skill and intelligence as mystery

ourmaninBusan · April 11th, 2006, 03:10 AM

Quote:

"Hello, shoe. I like you, shoe. You have a big heel, and I have a big belly.
Shoe, say hello to belly. Hello, belly! Hello, shoe! I hope my big sunglasses
don't fall on you. Please, no. Belly says, 'I am coming to get you, big
sparkly shoe!' Bad belly. Big belly says, 'I like my shirt. I am a plebian.
No, I am not. I like money. Did Michelle Williams get as big as me?
I don't think she did. I am hungry. I want vitamins. I want teddy bears
and soccer games! I want to eat a teddy bear.' Cutie coif then adds,
'I don't look like a soccer mom. I like my hair in a bun. I feel like I Dream
of Jeannie, but I don't dream of Jeannie. I dream of Tom..."

A*O · April 11th, 2006, 03:12 AM

He's prolly just stating the obvious, that she's off her face on 'vitamins' and/or lobotomised. That gormless grin......... Anyway, she's been off the radar for the last 48 hours - could this be IT???

tulip · April 11th, 2006, 09:26 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by A*O

He's prolly just stating the obvious, that she's off her face on 'vitamins' and/or lobotomised. That gormless grin......... Anyway, she's been off the radar for the last 48 hours - could this be IT???

I hope so -- today is the day I picked for the second coming of L. Ron

zorbeet · April 11th, 2006, 01:17 PM

I have visions of the tomkitten & baby Brangelina battling for total global domination of good vs evil.

NawdleZouss · April 11th, 2006, 02:25 PM

She's going to stab herself in the belly with a stiletto?

AliceInWonderland · April 11th, 2006, 02:58 PM

yeah if Gywneth gave birth already even though it was C-section, Katie should have already as well! she's seriously about 10 months pregnant by now, no joke, do the math for yourself if you don't beleive me!

LynnieD · April 11th, 2006, 03:03 PM

Maybe that's what Ted is referring to; when Katie is holding shoes, talking to them--that she's already had the baby, has been paid for it, and is so freaking sleep deprived/out of it, that she is talking to footwear.