Office gossip (and who knew Penny was so mean?)

[WhoAmI]

Nothing too earth-shattering here, but I got a laugh out of thinking about Penny Lane saying such mean things:

Can You Believe How Mean Office Gossip Can Be?
By JOHN TIERNEY
Published: November 2, 2009

Could adults gossiping in the office be more devious than the teenagers in “Gossip Girl”?

What’s the gossip in your office? What’s the gossip doing to your office? And what are the best strategies for gossips or antigossips to employ in the office?

If you have a hard time believing this, then you must have skipped the latest issue of the Journal of Contemporary Ethnography. Perhaps you saw “ethnography” and assumed it would just be quaint reports from the Amazon and the South Seas. But this time enthnographers have returned from the field with footage of a truly savage native ritual: teachers at an elementary school in the Midwest dishing about their principal behind her back.

These are rare records of “gossip episodes,” which have been the subject of a long-running theoretical debate among anthropologists and sociologists. One side, the functionalist school, sees gossip as a useful tool for enforcing social rules and maintaining group solidarity. The other school sees gossip more as a hostile endeavor by individuals selfishly trying to advance their own interests.

But both schools have spent more time theorizing than observing gossipers in their natural habitats. Until now, their flow charts of gossips’ conversations (where would social science be without flow charts?) have been largely based on studies in informal settings, like the casual conversations recorded in a German housing project and in the cafeteria of an American middle school.

The earlier studies found that once someone made a negative comment about a person who wasn’t there, the conversation would get meaner unless someone immediately defended the target. Otherwise, among both adults and teenagers, the insults would keep coming because there was so much social pressure to agree with the others.

Consider, for instance, the cascade of insults recorded in the earlier study of middle-school gossip by Donna Eder and Janet Lynne Enke of Indiana University. In this cafeteria conversation, a group of eighth-grade girls in the cafeteria were discussing an overweight classmate whose breasts they considered too large for her age:

Penny: In choir that girl was sitting in front of us and we kept going, “Moo.”

Karen: We were going, “Come here, cow; come here, cow.”

Bonnie: I know. She is one.

Penny: She looks like a big fat cow.

Julie: Who is that?

Bonnie: That girl on the basketball team.

Penny: That big red-headed cow.

Julie: Oh, yeah. I know. She is a cow.

The new study found that gossip in the workplace also tended to be overwhelmingly negative, but the insults were more subtle and the conversations less predictable, says Tim Hallett, a sociologist at Indiana University. Dr. Hallett conducted the study along with Dr. Eder and Brent Harger of Albright College.

“Office gossip can be a form of reputational warfare,” Dr. Hallett says. “It’s like informal gossip, but it’s richer and more elaborate. There are more layers to it because people practice indirectness and avoidance. People are more cautious because they know they can lose not just a friendship but a job.”

During his two years studying the group dynamics at a Midwestern elementary school, which allowed him access on condition of anonymity, Dr. Hallett found that the teachers became so comfortable with him and his camera that they would freely insult their bosses during one-on-one interviews. But at the teachers’ formal group meetings, where they knew that another teacher might report their insults to the principal, they were more discreet.

Instead of making direct criticisms, they sometimes offered obliquely sarcastic comments to test the waters. They used another indirect tactic categorized as praise the predecessor, as in the meeting when a teacher fondly recalled a previous administration: “It was so calm, and you could teach. No one was constantly looking over your shoulder.” The other teachers quickly agreed. No one explicitly called the current principal an authoritarian busybody, but that was the obvious implication.

Some teachers were especially adept at managing gossip. At one meeting, after someone complained about a student walking around with his hair shaped into horns (“Tell me, how is that part of the uniform dress code?”), the group began blaming the lapse in discipline on the assistant principal. The gossip seemed to be going down the same nasty track as the teenagers’ she’s-such-a-cow episode until another teacher, an ally of the assistant principal, smoothly intervened.

First, the teacher interrupted the attack by asking the name of the student with the horns. That deflected the group’s gossip on to the student’s academic difficulties and weird behavior (“He’s gotta frighten the little kids”). Then the teacher masterfully completed the rescue of the assistant principal by changing the topic entirely, reminding everyone of a different disciplinary issue that was the fault of a less popular administrator — the principal, who promptly became the new focus of the groups’ anger.

The teachers’ gossip never got as blatantly mean as the teenage girls’ — no one was ever called a cow — but in some ways the effects were more widely felt.

As teachers mocked the principal and complained about her being “stifling” and “hyper,” the atmosphere got more poisonous. The principal felt that her authority was being undermined by gossip and retaliated against teachers she suspected (correctly) of criticizing her. Teachers and administrators fled the school, and the students’ test scores declined.

“The gossip did serve to reinforce the teachers’ group solidarity, but in this case it was also a form of warfare that brought everyone down,” Dr. Hallett says. “It was reminiscent of the old saying that gossip is a three-pronged tongue: it can hurt the speaker and the listener, as well as the target.”

Some bosses have tried turning the office into a “no-gossip zone,” but Dr. Hallett says it is more realistic to try managing it. (If you have ideas for managing office gossip, you can suggest them at nytimes.com/tierneylab.)

If, say, an office rival seems poised to trash one of your absent allies, Dr. Hallett suggests you make a “pre-emptive positive evaluation.” A quick “Isn’t she doing a great job?” might be enough to stop the attack.

If your rival tries persisting with indirect sarcasm — “Oh, real great job” — you can force the issue by calmly asking what that means. That simple question, a dare made in a pleasant voice, often silenced the sarcastic gossips observed by Dr. Hallett.

And if that doesn’t work, Dr. Hallett suggests you try an even simpler tactic that was used successfully at the teachers’ meetings — and that is available in any workplace anytime. In fact, it’s one of the tactics that distinguishes office gossip from nonoffice gossip. When the going gets tough, when the gossip gets mean, you always have one reliable escape line: “Don’t we have some work to do here?”

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[Beeyotch]

Seriously, I think gossiping at work about people you see regularly is fucking poison.

That's why I gossip about celebs online.

[Penny Lane]

Aw, come on, the dead giveaway was the fact that I would have used another 'c' word besides cow.

[cupcake]

Thankful Im self employed...What stupid people

[Chilly Willy]

Originally Posted by Beeyotch

Seriously, I think gossiping at work about people you see regularly is fucking poison.

That's why I gossip about celebs online.

Very wise. I try not to hate people IRL, because it only makes myself bitter and unhappy. You get all riled up, for what? The people I dislike won't disappear just because I badmouth them, so it's wise not to get too angry in the first place.

[cupcake]

do

Originally Posted by Chilly Willy

Very wise. I try not to hate people IRL, because it only makes myself bitter and unhappy. You get all riled up, for what? The people I dislike won't disappear just because I badmouth them, so it's wise not to get too angry in the first place.

Very true! Just go do your job and dont get wrapped in all of the bologna

[Karistiona]

I try not to, but working in an office with eight other women can get pretty damn bitchy sometimes.

[yoyoma]

Originally Posted by Chilly Willy

Very wise. I try not to hate people IRL, because it only makes myself bitter and unhappy. You get all riled up, for what? The people I dislike won't disappear just because I badmouth them, so it's wise not to get too angry in the first place.

Very well said! Just not worth the headache....

[czb]

Originally Posted by Karistiona

I try not to, but working in an office with eight other women can get pretty damn bitchy sometimes.

good reason to invest in an ipod.

i try to stay out of the gossip at work for the reasons that bee and chilly mentioned.

[yoyoma]

Originally Posted by czb

good reason to invest in an ipod.

i try to stay out of the gossip at work for the reasons that bee and chilly mentioned.

Even with the Ipod you still have someone that will go out
of their way to tap you on the shoulder to listen to their stories...
So annoying...

[VenusInFauxFurs]

I try to tune people out that I don't like. I've seen workplace bitchery backfire. I try to choose my battles.

[Beeyotch]

yoyoma is right, even if you try to avoid them some bitches will go out of their freakin way to create drama and suck you into it. They feed off the negative energy, it's like a life force to them. Those are the bitches who make me pray daily that they get hit by a bus.