(617): I've slept with so many tools that you'd think my pussy was Home Depot.
I'm not saying anything ... ok, but it only reminds me of someone because they've picked up guys at Home Depot...
(636): At the bar. Guy comes up wearing a hollister shirt and says "lets blow this popsicle stand"
(314): You fucking left with him didn't you?!
(740): my lips still taste like vagina
(1-740): so you liked breakfast?
(740): ehh, still wish we woulda went to IHOP instead
(916): i think i have herpe
(1-916): just one?
(616): Dude, I found out the hard way that she wipes back to front. I ate her out and had to throw up.
I posted this one just to make Grim sick....
(979): Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
(770): I know its time to do laundry... i cant even find a dirty sock to wear because they all have jizz in them
(631): did you know you can prarie-dog a fart??
(949): i've come to the conclusion that there is no classy way to apply chloroseptic spray to your butthole.