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Thread: Suri's Burn Book

  1. #16
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    As I am sure you are all aware, Victoria Beckham brought Baby Harper to New York Fashion Week. And according to Mrs. B, Harper is LOVING IT.

    “We went in to Prada yesterday and she loved it. It was as if she was saying, ‘Mummy, I’m home!’”

    Look, we get it.

    Baby Harper is beautiful, Baby Harper is powerful, Baby Harper has great taste.

    Stop trying so hard.

    Also, I mean this in the nicest way possible, but those are some chunky arms on that baby.
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  2. #17
    Elite Member MontanaMama's Avatar
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    That pic makes baby Harper look like Suri
    If i hear one more personal attack, i will type while drunk, then you can cry! - Bugdoll
    (716): I'd call her a cunt, but she doesn't seem to have the depth or warmth
    Quote Originally Posted by shedevilang View Post
    (Replying to MontanaMama) This is some of the smartest shit I ever read

  3. #18
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    September 15, 2011

    Nick Cannon told People Magazine that he will “absolutely not” allow his children with Mariah Carey, the ridiculously named Moroccan and Monroe, to be in the entertainment industry.

    “I just want them to strive for something greater than entertainment. I’m one of those believers in teachers, professors, heart surgeons. That’s what I’m rooting for. If I could get a scientist, that’d be amazing.”

    First of all, I think it’s ridiculous when parents look down on the profession that has made them successful and famous. I mean, who do you think Nick Cannon would be if he wasn’t the host of America’s Got Talent? Probably a cater-waiter.

    Second of all, there’s no way that Mariah Carey and Nick Cannon’s genes produced a heart surgeon. There’s just no way.

    They should be hoping against hope that those babies inherit a smidge of their mother’s talent and their father’s … gosh, I don’t know, persistence?
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  4. #19
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    Britney Spears appeared on the UK morning program Daybreak, where she talked about her childrens’ futures:

    “When I’m on the road they come with me and they love being on the road. When I was younger I was always on the road and it’s always exciting. They are in awe, they come home and copy the dancers and the dancers’ moves and try to get on their heads and do spins and do all these things. They’ll definitely, probably be, in the entertainment businesses.”
    I mean, if Sean Preston and Jayden can figure out how to make money on headspins, they should do it, because it’s not like they’re going to be stockbrokers or pilots or any kind of job that requires math.

    Also, “definitely, probably” is a great phrase. Kind of like saying, “Britney Spears is definitely, probably not a danger to those kids anymore.”
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  5. #20
    Elite Member Mel1973's Avatar
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    Suri is in the "in group" here. also, she leads the coterie!
    Kill him.
    Kill her.
    Kill It.
    Kill everything... that IS the solution!
    П(•_•)П
    twitchy molests my signature!

  6. #21
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    IKR! Just got a new PM "bat signal" from her too.
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  7. #22
    Elite Member shedevilang's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sluce View Post
    Britney Spears appeared on the UK morning program Daybreak, where she talked about her childrens’ futures:

    “When I’m on the road they come with me and they love being on the road. When I was younger I was always on the road and it’s always exciting. They are in awe, they come home and copy the dancers and the dancers’ moves and try to get on their heads and do spins and do all these things. They’ll definitely, probably be, in the entertainment businesses.”
    I mean, if Sean Preston and Jayden can figure out how to make money on headspins, they should do it, because it’s not like they’re going to be stockbrokers or pilots or any kind of job that requires math.

    Also, “definitely, probably” is a great phrase. Kind of like saying, “Britney Spears is definitely, probably not a danger to those kids anymore.”
    I think this makes her the leader of cunterie.
    Silly bitches, twitchy links are NOT for kids!-Mel

  8. #23
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    I wish I knew where to begin with these photographs of the Jolie-Pitts hanging out with Gwen Stefani and her children.

    There’s Shiloh, making it clear just how inexperienced with makeup she is. (That blush would be all wrong for her complexion even if she had applied it correctly.) At least she’s trying?

    There’s Kingston Rossdale wearing what looks like lipstick all over his face.

    There’s a fresh-faced Zahara, who obviously didn’t participate in these childish shenanigans. (I knew I loved her for a reason.)

    Let’s just be glad these freaks found each other and call it a day.
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  9. #24
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    Jennifer Garner went on Ellen and said she wants her third baby to be another girl.

    “Three girls is a great way to grow up. I’m one of three girls and my little sister is awesome, so I just want a Susannah. It would be so weird to have a boy.”
    First of all, have you seen Violet Affleck? This kid’s going to be weird no matter what.

    Second of all, what if this baby is a boy? He’ll grow up and Google his parents and find out they didn’t want him. Actually, scratch that. Googling Ben Affleck is going to come up with far more unsavory results than this.
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  10. #25
    Elite Member Mel1973's Avatar
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    still loving suri...
    Kill him.
    Kill her.
    Kill It.
    Kill everything... that IS the solution!
    П(•_•)П
    twitchy molests my signature!

  11. #26
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    Well, the world survived the debut of Mariah Carey’s twins.

    First things first: I can’t tell if that baby’s head is too small for his body, or if the jacket just hasn’t been tailored properly.

    It’s heartening to see that motherhood clearly hasn’t changed Mariah’s outlook on life — she is just as self-centered as ever. She confirmed (again) that the babies were born to a recording of her song, “Fantasy” — the live version, so they heard the roaring applause. Because if you’re Mariah Carey’s child, you should know right off the bat that she is a Big Deal.

    Also, after that interview, you might have the impression that Mariah Carey is the first woman on the planet to give birth. “It’s difficult to understand what I went through,” she said, ”Because my pregnancy was very unique in terms of what happened to me. I was afraid I wasn’t going to be able to walk properly again. It was a huge strain.”

    Kate Gosselin had six babies at one time and she can still walk. Unfortunately.
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  12. #27
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    Katherine Heigl’s daughter Naleigh is apparently a budding fashionista, according to Us Magazine:



    “Naleigh loves clothes. She’s a total girly girl, and she put on these crazy stiletto shoes and could walk in them! She’s three years old and her foot is this big, but she could like walk around in these stilettos that I think are impossible to walk in,” the Knocked Up actress laughed.


    Heigl told Us Naleigh is “really chatty now” and even gets “this whole attitude.”

    “Not a bad attitude,” she clarified. “But like a very grown-up, saucy attitude that blows my mind. I don’t know where she’s picking it up, and I hope it’s not from me! That would be very upsetting.”


    But even though Naleigh is a total girly girl, she actually prefers dad over mom. “She’s a really daddy’s girl, so she’s always liked [Josh] better than me.”

    I approve of Naleigh’s fashion choices, although she should probably get some shoes in her size. (Disclaimer: I’m not sure how much of this is an actual story and how much of it is just Katherine Heigl lying to make her daughter seem chic

    The awkward thing about Katherine Heigl interviews is that she can’t seem to let her faults go. You have to act like the past never happened. Do you see Tom reliving the Oprah Couch Incident or the Matt Lauer Incident or anything about Valkyrie? No.

    And yet at every turn, Katherine Heigl loves reminding people that she is a known shrew — of course her daughter’s bad attitude came from her — and that Naleigh dislikes her.

    Ugh, why did I just spend so much time talking about these people? Gross.
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  13. #28
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    my favourite:

    Kristin Davis adopted a baby named Gemma Rose. I am a strong supporter of adoption. Everyone — my family included — often forgets that I, myself, have adopted siblings.
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

  14. #29
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    I loved that one too!
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  15. #30
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    This is hilarious!

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