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Thread: Scouse joke

  1. #1
    Elite Member Tiara's Avatar
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    Default Scouse joke

    For those of you who don't know a scouser is someone from a place in Britain called Liverpool. A stereotypical scouser is a bit of a scally - meaning they are dodgey, they steal, they are lazy bums who rarely have jobs. Pretty similar to chavs. So heres the joke...

    A scouser walks into the local welfare office, marches straight up to the counter and says, "Hi... You know, I just HATE drawing welfare. I'd really rather have a job."

    The social worker behind the counter says, "Your timing is
    excellent. We just got a job opening from a very wealthy old man who wants a chauffeur and bodyguard for his beautiful nymphomaniac daughter.
    You'll have to drive around in his Mercedes, but he'll supply all of your clothes.

    Because of the long hours, meals will be provided. You'll be expected to escort her on her overseas holiday trips.
    You will have to satisfy her sexual urges. You'll be provided a two-bedroom apartment above the garage.

    The starting salary is 200,000 a year plus a generous pension scheme"

    The guy, wide-eyed, says, "You're bullshittin' me!"

    The social worker says, "Yeah, well... you started it."
    No man is worth your tears, but once you find one that is, he won't make you cry
    G_ F_CK Y__RS_LF - Would you like to buy a vowel??

  2. #2
    Elite Member loulou58's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scouse joke

    hehe i appreciated that one Tiara im a nice scouser though me! never seen a dole queue in my life!

  3. #3
    Elite Member darksithbunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scouse joke

    I just love you guys!

  4. #4
    Elite Member Tiara's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scouse joke

    Quote Originally Posted by loulou58
    hehe i appreciated that one Tiara im a nice scouser though me! never seen a dole queue in my life!
    Ye me too! I'm not strictly a scouser coz I'm from just outside liverpool but if I ever go to any other country or city like Newcastle or Manchester I get called a scouser! I'm not a plastic scouser though, I have a Runcorn/Warrington accent which I suppose is quite similar to the scouse accent, ya know what I mean like, lar kidda??!
    No man is worth your tears, but once you find one that is, he won't make you cry
    G_ F_CK Y__RS_LF - Would you like to buy a vowel??

  5. #5
    Elite Member Barbara's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scouse joke

    Heheh, funny
    Nope.

  6. #6
    Elite Member loulou58's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scouse joke

    Quote Originally Posted by Tiara
    Ye me too! I'm not strictly a scouser coz I'm from just outside liverpool but if I ever go to any other country or city like Newcastle or Manchester I get called a scouser! I'm not a plastic scouser though, I have a Runcorn/Warrington accent which I suppose is quite similar to the scouse accent, ya know what I mean like, lar kidda??!
    haha you a woolyback? hehe

  7. #7
    Elite Member Tiara's Avatar
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    Default Re: Scouse joke

    Ye I guess so!
    No man is worth your tears, but once you find one that is, he won't make you cry
    G_ F_CK Y__RS_LF - Would you like to buy a vowel??

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