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Thread: French Joke

  1. #1
    Elite Member Tiara's Avatar
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    Default French Joke

    An Englishman is having breakfast one morning (coffee, croissants, bread, butter and jam) when a Frenchman, chewing bubble-gum, sits down next to him. The Englishman ignores the Frenchman who, nevertheless, starts a conversation.

    Frenchman: "You English folk eat the whole bread??"

    Englishman: (in a bad mood): "Of course."

    Frenchman: (after blowing a huge bubble) "We don't. In France, we only eat what's inside. The crusts we collect in a container, recycle it, transform them into croissants and sell them to Britain." The Frenchman has a smirk on his face.

    The Englishman listens in silence.

    The Frenchman persists: "Do you eat jam with the bread??"

    Englishman: "Of Course."

    Frenchman: (cracking his bubble-gum between his teeth and chuckling)
    "We don't. In France we eat fresh fruit for breakfast, then we put all the peels, seeds, and leftovers in containers, recycle them, transform them into jam and sell the jam to Britain."

    After a moment of silence, The Englishman then asks: "Do you have sex in France?"

    Frenchman: "Why of course we do", he says with a big smirk.

    Englishman: "And what do you do with the condoms once you've used them?"

    Frenchman: "We throw them away, of course."

    Englishman: "We don't. In Britain, we put them in a container, recycle them, melt them down into bubble-gum and sell them to France."
    No man is worth your tears, but once you find one that is, he won't make you cry
    G_ F_CK Y__RS_LF - Would you like to buy a vowel??

  2. #2
    Friend of Gossip Rocks! ourmaninBusan's Avatar
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    Default Re: French Joke

    Heh heh heh....

    I got one. This is from a book called "Get Even," published by
    Paladin Press. I don't remember it that well, but here it goes.

    BACK in about 1978, President Jimmy Carter invited Soviet
    leader Brehznev to Washington to discuss nuclear arms reduction.
    Carter's advisors wanted to create a photo-op for the occasion,
    and decided to play a practical joke on ol' Leonid -- he of the
    big, bushy eyebrows.


    Brehznev, former Soviet leader; Carter, 39th prez (1976-80)

    So -- Carter learns that Leonid plays the piano, and when
    Brehznev comes to the White House, there is a piano there.
    Carter asks, "Mr. Premier, would you care to play?"

    Brehznev humors them, sits down, begins playing, when he
    stops -- he sees a red button at the side of the piano.

    He pushes it, and a bucket of water dumps on him from the
    ceiling. Chuckles all around the American staff. "Very funny,"
    says Brehznev.

    Six months later, Carter is invited to the USSR for a summit.
    Carter is expecting a similar joke in return. Sure enough,
    when Carter and his staff enter the Kremlin lounge, there is
    a piano in the corner.

    Brehznev: "Mister president, do you play?"

    Carter knew this was coming, so he graciously sits down at the
    piano and plays. He glimpses a red button at the side of
    the piano, stops playing and presses it.

    Nothing. No water.

    Carter resumes playing piano, then after a while he presses
    the button again.

    Nothing.

    Carter plays some more. Several minutes go by. His staff
    is patiently waiting for the joke to go off. The soviet leaders
    smile grimly.

    Finally, Carter thinks, AH! They're making me anxious because
    now I'm expecting a prank -- that's the joke.

    Carter smiles broadly and says, "Well, I was really freaking out
    when I pressed that button and nothing happened. You really
    got me. I'll have to tell that to my golf friends back in the
    United States."

    Brehznev says, "what United States?"


    /thank you folks, be sure to tip your waitress.

    ♫` ∴|| ~∞≠∝ ♫♪ $ -4C

  3. #3
    Elite Member Tiara's Avatar
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    Default Re: French Joke

    ^^ Haha good one!
    No man is worth your tears, but once you find one that is, he won't make you cry
    G_ F_CK Y__RS_LF - Would you like to buy a vowel??

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