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Thread: I hate my inlaws!

  1. #1
    Hit By Ban Bus! Pippin's Avatar
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    Default I hate my inlaws!

    I go here to read about once a week for comic relief. I am fortunate because I don't have any inlaws.

    There is Mr. Pippin's step-sister, but she is a lovely woman. Besides, she lives about 400 miles away from us.

    Especially funny are the stories about Puff THe Manic Dragon and the Old Sea Hag. It's a site where hating your in laws is fun!

    When Mr. Pippin's step-mother was alive, I used to visit this site just for psychological relief....she was so awful. We used to call her Ol' Mama Bin Laden.

    I HATE MY INLAWS!!! :: In-Laws Stories

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    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pippin View Post
    When Mr. Pippin's step-mother was alive, I used to visit this site just for psychological relief....she was so awful. We used to call her Ol' Mama Bin Laden.

    I HATE MY INLAWS!!! :: In-Laws Stories
    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


    If I wanted the government in my womb I'd fuck a Senator

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    Silver Member Cotjockey's Avatar
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    thanks for posting that site!
    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic515_3.gif

  4. #4
    Hit By Ban Bus! Pippin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by witchcurlgirl View Post
    Do you know the first thing Ol' Mama Bin Laden said to me, before she even said hello to me?

    She grabbed my arm and pulled me aside, whispering conspiratorially, "Don't let him push you around."

    Mr. Pippin only decided that we should go and meet up with Ol' Mama Bin Laden because his step-sister wanted the two of them to make peace before the old lady croaked.

    Ol' Mama Bin Laden was an abusive old cow and Mr. Pippin hated her guts. I won't go into details about the abuse, of course.

    Ol' Mama Bin Laden was just about the most wretched sea hag you can imagine. Mr. Pippin and I ordered a pizza one evening and the evil old so and so didn't like it. She literally rolled back in one of those chairs that tilts (I wish I could have tilted her -- straight to hell) and picked at scabs on her dry legs while we were trying to eat.

    I tried to be polite intitially and I ate as much food as she provided that I could. It happens that I don't like meat with sweet, syrupy sauce on it. It's enough to make a dog vomit.

    The old cow chastised me in front of everyone, too, because I didn't use a side plate for the corn on the cob that she graciously provided, actually the only edible part of the meal.

    EEK! I must admit that I am a coffee snob insofar as I liked good, strong brewed coffee. Ol' Mama Bin Laden had none of that. Oh, no, it wasn't to be, she had a jar of instant coffee on her counter.

    Mr. Pippin and I escaped to a nearby shopping mall a couple of times, but never did we get two feet out the door before the old hag shrewed, "Don't you go jaywalking! A little girl died jaywalking two years ago!"

    'Too bad it wasn't you," I thought to myself. I've been a nearly life-long Montrealer and everyone in this city jaywalks. I'm still alive, damn it. Bill adopted the jaywalking habit, too, when he came here in the late 80s, everyone does it.

    I had to spend four days with that wretch and it was more than enough.

    Mr. Pippin and I went for a walk by ourselves, which of course the old bitch didn't like, and found sort of a forest clearing in the area. He told me, "I've lived thirty years without seeing this bitch, and I could easily do another thirty years."

    When we went to the airport (Ol' Mama Bin Laden tried to throw a wrench into our plans, hoping that she could screw things up so that we would stay longer with her, I was so upset that I burst into tears and Mr. Pippin had to step up to the plate, comfort me, and tell the old sea hag where to go) Mr. Pippin and the old bitch became iembroiled in a major battle.

    We didn't want her to come to the airport with us, because we had had well enough her. She tagged along, anyway.

    She hit Mr. Pippin so hard on the his head during the taxi ride to the airport that she not only startled me, but she startled the cab driver.

    You can laugh all you want, but in my experience, Ol' Mama Bin Laden was one of the most wretched characters I have ever had the bad luck to meet.

    I hope and I know that she won't be in my dimension when it's my time to go, the miserable, rotten, wretched hateful old so and so..what a despicable entity she was.

    *draws deep breath* Thank you for letting me vent!
    Last edited by Pippin; March 1st, 2008 at 11:47 PM.

  5. #5
    Elite Member Grimmlok's Avatar
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    ... soooo..... dead yet?

    I am from the American CIA and I have a radio in my head. I am going to kill you.

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    Hit By Ban Bus! Pippin's Avatar
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    Thank God, yes, she's expired. Not before time, too.

    Ol' Mama Bin Laden didn't want a normal service/burial. (Not that anyone would have shown up, save to cheer).

    She insisted that Mr. Pippin's sister scatter her ashes over a lake in Ontario.

    And I was just reading in our paper today that frogs are becoming extinct....

  7. #7
    Elite Member Grimmlok's Avatar
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    *looks at his glass of water in horror*
    I am from the American CIA and I have a radio in my head. I am going to kill you.

  8. #8
    Elite Member Sojiita's Avatar
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    I hate all of your inlaws..
    Don't slap me, cause I'm not in the mood!

  9. #9
    Gold Member lonestar's Avatar
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    the one great thing to come from my recent breakup.... i will never have to ever spend another second with "my son is better than the second coming" and the sibling with evil in their eyes. (sibling scared the shit out of me for a very good reason)
    one time said mother actually had the audacity to ask me to leave a vacation early so they could have "family only time". (mind you, we were basically engaged and it was my damn vacation idea in the first place). she also told me to my face that i was not allowed to move in with him before marriage. (like it's her decision what her grown ass son does??) suffice to say i'm sooo glad she will never be my "family". and i hope my ex gets to spend all of eternity with Pippin's former monster in law.

  10. #10
    Hit By Ban Bus! Pippin's Avatar
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    Honestly, I think one of the hardest lessons I had to learn in life was to try to be nice to Ol' Mama Bin Laden. I am not sure how well I did, but if I passed the muster, I'm up for anything.

    Yet again, I haven't forgotten about that old gnarled slimy ball of putrid green mouldy kelp.

    I should go to complain about the old snorting camel on that site.

  11. #11
    Elite Member panda's Avatar
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    my mother-in-law is Satan. I wish she'd die.

  12. #12
    Hit By Ban Bus! Pippin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lonestar View Post
    the one great thing to come from my recent breakup.... i will never have to ever spend another second with "my son is better than the second coming" and the sibling with evil in their eyes. (sibling scared the shit out of me for a very good reason)
    one time said mother actually had the audacity to ask me to leave a vacation early so they could have "family only time". (mind you, we were basically engaged and it was my damn vacation idea in the first place). she also told me to my face that i was not allowed to move in with him before marriage. (like it's her decision what her grown ass son does??) suffice to say i'm sooo glad she will never be my "family". and .
    I am sorry to hear about your troubles; it's especially hard when there are children involved, I imagine.

    Sometimes evil beings such as in laws do try to pit family members against each other, don't they?

    Lord, you must really hate the woman to want her to spend tinme with the old wretch that is Ol' Mama Bin Laden.

    Once you establish yourself with the family of YOUR choosing, and without interference from horrid in-laws, you will have a much better life, it just stands to reason.

  13. #13
    Hit By Ban Bus! Pippin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by panda View Post
    my mother-in-law is Satan. I wish she'd die.
    Cross your fingers and pray. Ol' Mama Bin Laden died! If a hellish entity like she is left this planet, your reviled sickening piece of s*it awful comes with the package relative can do the same. There is hope!

    It happened to me (looking at the sky in a joyous manner). It can happen to you!

  14. #14
    Gold Member lonestar's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pippin View Post
    I am sorry to hear about your troubles; it's especially hard when there are children involved, I imagine.

    Sometimes evil beings such as in laws do try to pit family members against each other, don't they?

    Lord, you must really hate the woman to want her to spend tinme with the old wretch that is Ol' Mama Bin Laden.

    Once you establish yourself with the family of YOUR choosing, and without interference from horrid in-laws, you will have a much better life, it just stands to reason.
    oh the woman can continue to live in her delusions that her son(my ex) is amazing. thats gonna be punishment enough when she realizes he sucks. it's the ex-boyfriend i wish to spend eternity with mama bin laden.

  15. #15
    Gold Member DevilDoll2025's Avatar
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    I like my boyfriends parents, it's his older sister that I hate. She's a two faced bitch who tried to get my bf to break up with me, and hs'e s an incredibly rude cow about everything, when I last saw her in person I just wished I had a big stapler to shut her fucking mouth. Sorry, I had to let that out somewhere.

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