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Thread: Don't Shop Amazon While Drunk

  1. #1
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Default Don't Shop Amazon While Drunk

    10+ Times People Shopped Online While Drunk And Regretted It Deeply



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    By​ Viktorija G.



    Just as you should never put car keys in the hands of someone who's had one too many, you should also keep them as far away from the computer as possible. Online shopping and alcohol is a dangerous combination, and we've got a whole list of people who ended up with strange purchases that they barely may or may not remember making.

    Think about your future. Don't drink and buy. Unless, of course, you're in the market for a plastic bag full of tiny handcuffs.



    #1 Let's All Take A Minute To Appreciate This Drunk Amazon Purchase



    #2 We Also Made A Recent Drunken Amazon Purchase For Our Cat That Worked Out Well


    ]
    mybeardismymanifestoReport
    #3 My Friend's Latest Drunken Ebay Purchase




    #4 Drunk. Got The Dominos Guy To Buy Me Mcdonalds In The Special Instructions Section




    #5 Accidentally Bought My Toad 100 Top Hats Instead Of One While I Was Drunk Online Shopping



    Alicatscat



    #6 My Mom Got Drunk Last Night And Bought My Family A Third Dog. Everybody Meet Hudson



    #7 Sometimes Late Night Drunken Amazon Purchases Are A Good Idea





    #8 When I Was Drunk I Bought My Dog Socks Off Ebay





    #9 My Wife's Very Proud Of Her Drunken Purchase



    #10 Giant Googley Eyes. The Best Drunk Online Purchase I Have Made Yet




    SirTenderBeard

    Check out the link for the rest of the posts. 10+ Times People Shopped Online While Drunk And Regretted It Deeply | Bored Panda


    I LMAO through these. There are a couple of things in here that might tempt me too.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

  2. #2
    Elite Member panic's Avatar
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    i saw a car like that, only it had big eyelashes too.
    kasippu likes this.
    "The wild, cruel beast is not behind the bars of the cage. He is in front of it."...Axel Munthe

  3. #3
    Elite Member Waterslide's Avatar
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    I was gonna say, I'd buy some of this shit sober as a judge, which is why no one should give me credit cards.
    "AND WHEN YOU BECAME DENISE, I TOLD ALL YOUR COLLEAGUES, THOSE CLOWN COMICS, TO FIX THEIR HEARTS OR DIE."

  4. #4
    Elite Member panic's Avatar
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    hey i like the monkey.
    pinkbunnyslippers likes this.
    "The wild, cruel beast is not behind the bars of the cage. He is in front of it."...Axel Munthe

  5. #5
    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    Ha, I love these.

    Drunk amazon buys have been some of the best highlights of my life in the past decade.

  6. #6
    Elite Member Bluebonnet's Avatar
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    I love the top hat for the toad. Like Michigan J. Frog

    Before you can judge a man, walk a mile in his shoes. After that, who cares? He's a mile away and you've got his shoes. - Billy Connolly

  7. #7
    Elite Member yanna's Avatar
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    LOL the Nicolas Cage pillow just kills me.

  8. #8
    Elite Member Trixie's Avatar
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    Don't drink and eBay has always been my advice, speaking from experience.
    These people don't give a fuck about YOU or us. It's a message board, for Christ's sake. ~ mrs.v ~
    ~"Fuck off! Aim higher! Get a life! Get away from me!" ~the lovely and talented Miss Julia Roberts~



  9. #9
    Elite Member Ravenna's Avatar
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    I do not accept drunkenness as an excuse for buying a Nicholas Cage pillowcase.
    lindsaywhit, Trixie and Nevan like this.

  10. #10
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ravenna View Post
    I do not accept drunkenness as an excuse for buying a Nicholas Cage pillowcase.

    Buzzkill!
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

  11. #11
    Elite Member stella blue's Avatar
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    I don't think 100 top hats for a toad makes any less sense than just buying one.

    The cat sofa is slaying me. So is getting McDonald's from Domino's. This thread is great.

  12. #12
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    If you click on the link there are 18 pages of this stuff. I only posted two. Here are pages 3 and 4.

    #11 Went Online-Shopping While Drunk... Now I Own A Jurassic-Pug

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]


    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)]cookiearthquakeReport[/COLOR]
    #12 Got Drunk On Amazon And Bought The Cat A House

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]


    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)]goulcherReport[/COLOR]
    #13 Sober Me Got A Present From Drunk Me

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]


    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)]UsedCheeseReport[/COLOR]
    #14 So I Was Drunk One Night And Added This To My Amazon Wish List, My Mom Blindly Ordered Stuff For Christmas

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]


    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)]dddashReport[/COLOR]
    #15 While Drunk, I Somehow Found And Bought 8lbs Of Cereal Marshmallows

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)]

    [/COLOR]
    #16 Drunk Me Apparently Decided To Go Online Shopping Again

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]


    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)]20somethingelseReport[/COLOR]
    #17 "Hey Bud, I Got Really Drunk And Bought A Pig Last Night. Her Name Is Carol. Come Over And Meet Her."

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]


    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)]beekayloungeReport[/COLOR]
    #18 Ordered An Eggplant Vibrator. I'm A Straight Male...

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]


    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)]AbortedGallowReport[/COLOR]
    #19 Best. Drunk. Purchase. Ever. Dadbod Beach Towel

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]


    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)]ldebrouwerReport[/COLOR]
    #20 Apparently I Drunk Ordered 11.5lbs Of Cheese On Sunday

    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]


    [COLOR=rgba(0, 0, 0, 0.8)][/COLOR]
    Last edited by greysfang; May 5th, 2017 at 06:12 PM.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

  13. #13
    Elite Member DeChayz's Avatar
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    I'm sorry, THAT is a legit purchase

  14. #14
    Elite Member stella blue's Avatar
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    You can buy cereal marshmallows? That is a game changer.

  15. #15
    Elite Member stella blue's Avatar
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    I'm going to need one of these:

    Moongirl, MsDark and nico like this.

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