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Thread: Alone on Thanksgiving? Mad at your dad? Read on...

  1. #1
    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    Default Alone on Thanksgiving? Mad at your dad? Read on...

    Alone on Thanksgiving? Mad at your dad? Read on... - m4w

    [FONT='Bitstream Vera Serif', 'Times New Roman', serif][/FONT]Alone on Thanksgiving? Mad at your dad? Read on... - m4w (East Nashville)





    It's Thanksgiving. Want to skip that long, insulting conversation about how youre still single? About how your parents really want more grand children? Well, look no further!

    I am a 28 year old felon with no high school degree, and a dirty old van one year younger than me painted like Eddie Van Halen's guitar. I can play anywhere between the ages of 20 and 29 depending on if i shave. I'm a line cook and work late nights at a bar. If you'd like to have me as your stictly platonic date for Thanksgiving, but have me pretend to be in a very long or serious relationship with you, to torment your family, I'm game.

    I can do these things, at your request:
    openly hit on other female guests while you act like you dont notice.

    start instigative discussions about politics and/or religion.

    propose to you in front of everyone.

    pretend to be really drunk as the evening goes on (sorry, i dont drink, but i used to. alot. too much in fact. i know the drill).

    Start an actual, physical fight with a family member, either inside or on the front lawn for all the neighbors to see.

    I require no pay but the free meal i will receive as a guest!


    Edit: mikeshardlemonade69 (for reddit)
    • do NOT contact me with unsolicited services or offers

    post id: 4769760484
    posted: 2 days ago
    updated: 7 hours ago
    email to friend
    ♥ best of [?]
    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    "What's traitors, precious?" -- President Gollum

  2. #2
    Elite Member BITTER's Avatar
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    Um, I don't know how my family would feel about this one...
    Good luck getting a cat to do anything let alone join in on your sexcapades. - Air Quotes

  3. #3
    Elite Member Flygirl's Avatar
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    My family would expect nothing less. In my single days, it was pretty much understood I was going to be bringing home some "stray" who would provide the entertainment.

  4. #4
    Elite Member MsDark's Avatar
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    I'll pass this on to my Nashville friends.
    My Posts Have Won Awards. Can Any Of You Claim The Same? -ur_next_ex

    "I don't have pet peeves. I have major psychotic fucking hatreds, okay". ~George Carlin

  5. #5
    Elite Member gas_chick's Avatar
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    This is awesome.
    I am going to come and burn the fucking house down... but you will blow me first."

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