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Thread: THANKS, Obama.

  1. #1
    Elite Member WhateverLolaWants's Avatar
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    Default THANKS, Obama.

    From here:

    26 Ways President Obama Has Completely Ruined The Country


    26 Ways President Obama has completely RUINED the country.



    By creating corporate loopholes for companies that put chains in the way of EVERYTHING.




    2. By signing a bill into law that makes grills extra slippery.



    3. By SOMEHOW allowing cookies to get bigger than the glasses they are meant to be dunked in.



    4. By outsourcing hat factories, thus preventing the production of quality hats.



    5. By instituting a ban on electric pencil sharpeners, resulting in a deformed pencil epidemic.



    6. By putting banana peels on fashion runways.



    7. By continuing conflict not only in the Middle East, but also with the d-bag neighbors from across the street.



    8. By forcing all Slurpees to resemble the horrible, sad, disappointing bottom Slurpee section.



    9. By allowing good old-fashioned American trays to be replaced by these wonky Chinese ones.



    10. By refusing to acknowledge our country's very serious soda-rolling problem.



    11. By turning a blind eye to the very real danger that is ice cream that's frozen too hard.



    12. By making it much harder to kick a sign when you're just feelin' a little peeved.



    13. By conspiring with the liberals in Congress to make all sandwiches land face down in the worst situations.



    14. By cutting back funding on the nation's superhero initiative, thus leaving the role of Spider-Man to this bumbling idiot.



    15. By forcing this dude to eat his facial hair.



    16. By imposing a new big government regulation to shrink the size of dominoes, resulting in tragedies like this.



    17. By changing the Earth's gravitational field, thus making it much more difficult to execute a successful backflip.



    18. By giving you all the bad letters in Scrabble.



    19. By making the snow in the Arctic regions extra cold, just to screw around with some poor polar bears.



    20. By thinking it's somehow OK to get a bunch of bees drunk before they have to go to work at the hive.



    21. By bribing this dog to throw the dog show because he's a much bigger fan of hounds.



    22. By telepathically giving this child a horrible haircut, thus setting him up for ridicule.



    23. By gluing this poor drummer's music sheets together "just for a giggle."



    24. By refusing to acknowledge the pain and suffering our nation's tape users go through each day.



    25. By forcing good, hardworking Americans into carrying all their cleaning supplies at once.



    26. And by hanging out with Tom Hanks and not inviting me.


    THANKS, OBAMA.
    ----------------------------
    There will be times you might leap before you look
    There'll be times you'll like the cover and that's precisely why you'll love the book
    Do it anyway

  2. #2
    Elite Member msdeb's Avatar
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    those are funny. The domino one cracked me up
    Basic rule of Gossip Rocks: Don't be a dick.Tati
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  3. #3
    Super Moderator Tati's Avatar
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    OMG. Lola, thanks. I needed that right now.
    WhateverLolaWants likes this.
    If you reveal your secrets to the wind you should not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees.

    - Kahlil Gibran

  4. #4
    Elite Member WhateverLolaWants's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by msdeb View Post
    those are funny. The domino one cracked me up
    My older son found that especially hilarious. Younger son didn't get what was so funny
    ----------------------------
    There will be times you might leap before you look
    There'll be times you'll like the cover and that's precisely why you'll love the book
    Do it anyway

  5. #5
    Super Moderator Tati's Avatar
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    It reminds me of that "Worst things in the world" series, which similarly busts my gut.
    If you reveal your secrets to the wind you should not blame the wind for revealing them to the trees.

    - Kahlil Gibran

  6. #6
    Elite Member WhateverLolaWants's Avatar
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    We have a tradition in our house: Whenever someone does something incredibly inane/brain dead in one of those informercials (I CAN'T ADJUST THE THERMOSTAT BECAUSE I'M WRAPPED IN A BLANKET!) one of us will whine, "Oh noooo, I'm stupid!"

    Brookie and Laxmobster like this.
    ----------------------------
    There will be times you might leap before you look
    There'll be times you'll like the cover and that's precisely why you'll love the book
    Do it anyway

  7. #7
    Elite Member DeChayz's Avatar
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    ^My new favorite is the ear wax cleaner commercial where the guy's using a Q-Tip and screams like he's stabbing his ear drum with an icepick.

  8. #8
    Elite Member MmeVertigina's Avatar
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    Very funny!

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    Elite Member Kittylady's Avatar
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    My favourite infomercial right now is for some hair removal gadget called the No-No. I can't hear them twatwaffling about how their No-No is so awesome without thinking of all the times I've heard someone talk about taking it up the no-no.
    I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. Hunter S Thompson

    How big would a T-Rex wang be?! - Karistiona


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