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Thread: Feminism causes Global Warming, say experts

  1. #1
    Silver Member misrule's Avatar
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    Talking Feminism causes Global Warming, say experts

    Ok, this made me laugh...

    FEMINISM CAUSES GLOBAL WARMING, SAY EXPERTS

    20-11-09
    WOMEN who know their place emit less carbon dioxide than uppity madames with so-called careers, it was confirmed last night.

    The Institute for Studies found that staying at home with children and not driving a stylish city-car produced a smaller carbon footprint than rushing around in a natty suit while using a mobile phone to arrange marketing strategies.

    Professor Henry Brubaker said: "Woman who know their place are on average 40% less carboniferous than women who think they are just as good as me.

    "In fact, I would suggest that Islamic dictatorships who forbid women to drive on pain of stoning will one day be seen as the heroes of the ecological movement."

    Professor Brubaker said the emissions caused by decent women were sustainable, including Friday night sex with a low energy light on, though more work was needed to control the pollution caused by the baking of delicious pies.

    And he stressed that women had a crucial role to play in the fight against global warming, adding: "Let's not forget that men can only save the planet if we have a clean shirt and a decent breakfast."

    But chippy feminist Nikki Hollis criticised the report, adding: "It is every woman's right to drive a Freelander and fly to New York for business shopping.

    "We can only achieve true equality when we can stand shoulder-to-shoulder with men, look at the cataclysmic destruction of the world's ecosystem and proudly proclaim that at least half of it was our fault."

    But Professor Brubaker insisted: "While Ms Hollis makes some interesting points, it's not getting the tea made is it?"
    The Daily Mash - FEMINISM CAUSES GLOBAL WARMING, SAY EXPERTS
    I haven't fucked much with the past, but I've fucked plenty with the future

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    Elite Member NicoleWasHere's Avatar
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  3. #3
    Elite Member caramel's Avatar
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    So that's it!
    we don't have to make love to have an orgasm

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    Elite Member McJag's Avatar
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    Professor Henry Brubaker said: "Woman who know their place are on average 40% less carboniferous than women who think they are just as good as me.

    As good as? Vastly superior,more like it.
    I didn't start out to collect diamonds, but somehow they just kept piling up.-Mae West

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    Elite Member Shelly's Avatar
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    Then why don't men stay at home too, I don't think men and their cars and produce less carboniferous than a woman.

    What un idiot, I want to hit him with a car for christmas.
    "Well isn't that special"

  6. #6
    Elite Member caramel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shelly View Post

    What un idiot, I want to hit him with a car for christmas.
    Woman, you are angry just because you don't know youre place beneath him.
    we don't have to make love to have an orgasm

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    Elite Member Brookie's Avatar
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    No, really, if he were hit by a car, think about how much less smelly man-carbon that would make possible.

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    Elite Member Shelly's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by caramel View Post
    Woman, you are angry just because you don't know youre place beneath him.
    Please, he doesn't know his place, and that is under my car.

    What kind of accident would you want to see happen to him?
    "Well isn't that special"

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    Elite Member caramel's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Shelly View Post

    What kind of accident would you want to see happen to him?
    Something with spikes up his ass, please.
    we don't have to make love to have an orgasm

  10. #10
    Silver Member misrule's Avatar
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    Um...the article is supposed to be a joke! The Daily Mash is like The Onion - it's not a serious news article! It's irony!
    I haven't fucked much with the past, but I've fucked plenty with the future

  11. #11
    Elite Member Shelly's Avatar
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    ^Irony in text is so tricky and people are idiots so you never know when someone is trying to be funny. Well, at least there's someone on the list I don't have to kill ^
    "Well isn't that special"

  12. #12
    Silver Member misrule's Avatar
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    ^I probably should have put a disclaimer in the original post - sorry!!

    You're right, unfortunately, this could very well be true, considering some of the assholes out there... Give it time and someone probably will be pushing this for real...
    I haven't fucked much with the past, but I've fucked plenty with the future

  13. #13
    Elite Member caramel's Avatar
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    I thought this was for real too, thanks for clearing that up

    Now that I think about it now one can be serious with that kind of stuff, but there is all kind of crazies out there.
    we don't have to make love to have an orgasm

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    Elite Member Kittylady's Avatar
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    I mis-read Daily Mash as Daily Mail, so I was prepared to believe some idiot had actually said this.

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