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Thread: You're too fat to wipe your own ass, use this stick thing

  1. #1
    Elite Member Grimmlok's Avatar
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    Red face You're too fat to wipe your own ass, use this stick thing

    [YOUTUBE]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=crfGXmxJ1vM[/YOUTUBE]
    I am from the American CIA and I have a radio in my head. I am going to kill you.

  2. #2
    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    "Right after going caca times, have you ever thought to yourself before wiping, "Ugh. It's too far to reach. Fuckit." Well, the Comfort Wipe is the product your asshole has been praying for! Your chonies will love it too! "Not since the 1880s" (Can I have WTF?) has there been an invention that improves the task of wiping your own ass with "archaic" toilet paper. It's like a squeegee for your butt! Seeeeriously, how is this any easier? You have to pull out The Shit Stick, attach a piece of toilet paper to it, lift your ass up, aim for the brown eye, wipe and then release. Not to mention that you have to clean it every week when the flies start having a party on it. Well, I guess it gets clean when you use it to scrub your back in the shower.
    What's the opposite of making sense? THE COMFORT WIPE!.
    That being said, every ho in my family is getting one of these for Christmas! The "big guys" in my family are getting two!
    P.S. - The memaw at the 0:45 mark probably can't wipe her ass on her own, because she's too hopped up on pills. Just a guess."


    Open Post: Hosted By The Comfort Wipe | Dlisted


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    I'd think that if you can't reach your own backside, it's time to lose weight.
    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

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    "What's traitors, precious?" -- President Gollum

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    Elite Member Rondette's Avatar
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    Hahahaaaaaa, ew.

    my sister is an occupational therapist and has known about these for a while. I suppose if you are a big fatty or have mobility issues they are useful but it looks like a lot of fuss to me, ugh and imagine how skeevy the end of that would get after a while...ew.

  4. #4
    Elite Member Honey's Avatar
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    That made me laugh, I thought it was a piss take, but they are serious

  5. #5
    Gold Member Flak's Avatar
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    It looks like a G Spot stimulator.

    I do know some germaphobes who would love something like this.
    By trying we can easily learn to endure adversity -- another man's I mean. -Mark Twain

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    Elite Member McJag's Avatar
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    OMG! That is disturbing. It would never work for me,I use tons of tp.
    I didn't start out to collect diamonds, but somehow they just kept piling up.-Mae West

  7. #7
    Elite Member Mariesoleil's Avatar
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    What the fuck? Is this shit for real?
    "Books are the quietest and most constant of friends; they are the most accessible and wisest of counsellors, and the most patient of teachers."

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    Elite Member *DIVA!'s Avatar
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    WOW!
    Baltimore O's ​Fan!

    I don''t know if she really fucked the board though. Maybe just put the tip in. -Mrs. Dark

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    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

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    "What's traitors, precious?" -- President Gollum

  10. #10
    Elite Member Rondette's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mariesoleil View Post
    What the fuck? Is this shit for real?
    Yeppers, as I said, my Occupational Therapist sister had to dole these out to grannies and fatties who couldn't reach 'down there'

    Although they were NHS issue and probably not as, uh, stylish.....

  11. #11
    Elite Member Daphne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by twitchy2.0 View Post
    One of my ex-coworkers looked exactly like this.

  12. #12
    Elite Member Rondette's Avatar
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    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    ^ Love your avatar!
    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

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    "What's traitors, precious?" -- President Gollum

  14. #14
    Elite Member dangerous's Avatar
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    For over 100 years, we've been scrunching and folding toilet paper. Finally
    there's a better way--fold it and then attach it to this stick thing.

    andddd when through just press the release button and shake it until the
    tissue falls off. If all else fails, you might have to use your actual hands to pull
    it off. omgg

    how is this a better way again? seems like a bunch of extra unnecessary
    steps.

  15. #15
    Bronze Member Mousey Housewife's Avatar
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    Didn't the Romans have a communal sponge on a stick that was basically the same thing?

    Somehow I doubt this would be comfortable for any woman using it....
    Trapped in a box by a cockney nut job, Ave a cuppa tea, Ave a cuppa tea...

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