An Open Letter From Dylan Farrow

**sluce** · February 4th, 2014, 08:02 PM

She has access to her records where her statements were recorded over and over and over. If her memories match what she said then, we know he story has not changed. Her story then may well have been coached but we will never know.

**kasippu** · February 5th, 2014, 01:25 AM

Originally Posted by sluce

Triggers are a big deal in these cases. I had a client who connected yellow to her abuse because she was holding a yellow crayon the first time her big brother violated her. After that she refused to wear yellow and would rip out any yellow flowers her mom planted in the yard.

So sad.
That is why I believe Dylan, that toy-train, a really insignificant detail to outsiders.

Maybe Allen just gets obsessed by certain people and sometimes they are 7, sometimes they are 13, sometimes they are older.

And Mia , how fucked up is she. 'Do not leave Woody alone with Dylan'??? What?? Leave him! Dating mother and daughter and the same time. What the???
They both are very screwed up people and I pity their kids.

**NoNoRehab** · February 5th, 2014, 02:43 AM

She has access to her records where her statements were recorded over and over and over.

Sorry, but how do we know that? In her letter she talks about her personal memories.

If her memories match what she said then, we know he story has not changed.

If those records even still exist, it's unlikely any of them would be made public. Also, if she was able to read her previous statements, there would be no way to determine if her story told now (as an adult) was spontaneous memory or if she just rehashed what she read.

That's a huge problem with trying to determine the truth decades after something happened. The original case was already so convoluted and various authorities became involved with various records, and any involving a child has to have stringent standards. Now, twenty years later, witnesses may be gone, people's memories have naturally changed or gone away, etc. It's something that's been so analyzed and rehashed that anyone involved would have the past couple of decades to get their side of the story exactly the way they want it.

Someone asked about the nanny who allegedly walked in on Woody and Dylan. Her name is Alison Strickland but I couldn't find anything about her, aside from mentions in the original articles from '92. She was a nanny for the kids of Casey Pascal, a friend of Mia's who was visiting. Strickland never went to the authorities nor spoke to Mia directly about the incident; Mia said she heard it from Pascal who heard it from Strickland. Just from a quick Google search, it doesn't appear that Strickland's ever gone public or anybody from the media has ever tracked her down since 1992.

**Kittylady** · February 5th, 2014, 05:02 AM

Originally Posted by witchcurlgirl

Ask the guy nearest to you right now if he'd fuck a 19 year old. Did he say yes? Of course he did.

I can pretty much say that my BFF wouldn't go near a 19 year old. I've seen my BFF get freaked and try and lose himself somewhere else in the pub when a girl in her late teens/barely 20's started giving him the eye and he got seriously worried when his niece was teasing him that one of her friends had a crush on him.

Not every guy fantasizes about nailing a 19 year old or similar, particularly when they have got older and wiser and are looking for a woman who is more than just boasting rights and arm candy.

**kasippu** · February 5th, 2014, 05:19 AM

Originally Posted by witchcurlgirl

Ask the guy nearest to you right now if he'd fuck a 19 year old. Did he say yes? Of course he did.

But then ask the same guy if he would fuck the 19 year old daughter of his lover since 15 years?

**Mel1973** · February 5th, 2014, 07:15 AM

Originally Posted by sparkles

I had a similar experience at about the age of 10 or so and I still remember the same sick feeling you are describing. I felt hot and then cold, and started feeling nauseated and lightheaded when I realized that something bad happened. Then I ran out of the building, jumped on my bicycle and sped home. The sick feeling stayed for years when what happened crossed my mind. It was only as an adult that I told anyone. I remember to this day what I wore. I never wore it again.

I know what you mean. For me, it was the smell of this shitty lotion. It smelled like roses. Fucking hate that. I avoid the flower departments and any perfume or lotion with that fucking rose smell.

Originally Posted by sluce

Triggers are a big deal in these cases. I had a client who connected yellow to her abuse because she was holding a yellow crayon the first time her big brother violated her. After that she refused to wear yellow and would rip out any yellow flowers her mom planted in the yard.

yes, they are.

Originally Posted by kasippu

So sad.
That is why I believe Dylan, that toy-train, a really insignificant detail to outsiders.

Maybe Allen just gets obsessed by certain people and sometimes they are 7, sometimes they are 13, sometimes they are older.

And Mia , how fucked up is she. 'Do not leave Woody alone with Dylan'??? What?? Leave him! Dating mother and daughter and the same time. What the???
They both are very screwed up people and I pity their kids.

This whole GROUP of people seems very, very, very fucked up. What kind of woman/mother thinks something COULD happen between her boyfriend and their child/adopted child and doesn't DO SOMETHING? I'd be hard-pressed not to KILL someone if I thought that person would ever even THINK of touching my child.

**witchcurlgirl** · February 5th, 2014, 07:41 AM

But when that person can put you in movies, its perfectly natural to do nothing. I mean, what's more important, our children or our careers?

**kasippu** · February 5th, 2014, 07:50 AM

Originally Posted by Mel1973

I know what you mean. For me, it was the smell of this shitty lotion. It smelled like roses. Fucking hate that. I avoid the flower departments and any perfume or lotion with that fucking rose smell.

So so sorry. That is a always a fear I have for my children. I never experienced anything myself but when I hear those stories... I always tell them, when you with someone and it feels wrong, just kick them in the private parts and run away. And tell me!

This whole GROUP of people seems very, very, very fucked up. What kind of woman/mother thinks something COULD happen between her boyfriend and their child/adopted child and doesn't DO SOMETHING? I'd be hard-pressed not to KILL someone if I thought that person would ever even THINK of touching my child.

I can assure you that. if someone touches my children, there will be physical violence! This story is beyond sick. The Soon Y part, gosh finding nude pictures of your daughter taken by your boyfriend. He would suffer. And for sure I wouldn't have dinner with him or it would be poisoned.

**sluce** · February 5th, 2014, 08:58 AM

Originally Posted by NoNoRehab

Sorry, but how do we know that? In her letter she talks about her personal memories.

We know that it is a fact that she is entitled to her medical records. It's a legal issue.

Originally Posted by NoNoRehab

If those records even still exist, it's unlikely any of them would be made public. Also, if she was able to read her previous statements, there would be no way to determine if her story told now (as an adult) was spontaneous memory or if she just rehashed what she read.

That's a huge problem with trying to determine the truth decades after something happened. The original case was already so convoluted and various authorities became involved with various records, and any involving a child has to have stringent standards. Now, twenty years later, witnesses may be gone, people's memories have naturally changed or gone away, etc. It's something that's been so analyzed and rehashed that anyone involved would have the past couple of decades to get their side of the story exactly the way they want it.

You missed my point. I said if her original story from all those years ago matches what she is saying now, then they are not implanted memories. At no time did I say her records should be made public. I am well aware of the stringent standards of investigating these claims as I work with it every day. I also know that half the investigation done with her did not follow the stringent standards as they were not the same back then. I also know that some of the records that showed they questioned if this was legit somehow disappeared. She should ask for copies of all records pertaining to the investigation to keep for own records. I have a feeling she would be shocked to see what was written about her.

It is also very normal for Dylan to protect Mia and insist she did all she could to protect her. She has already lost so much. To then have to acknowledge that her mother failed to protect her can be devastating.

**mjw** · February 5th, 2014, 10:35 AM

Dylan Farrow's Feb. 1 open letter to The New York Times detailing sexual molestation she says she suffered at the hands of her father Woody Allen reignited a controversy that has divided their family bitterly for more than 20 years.

Now her brother Moses Farrow is speaking out to defend Allen – and accuse their mother, Mia Farrow, of poisoning the children against their father.

"My mother drummed it into me to hate my father for tearing apart the family and sexually molesting my sister," Moses, 36, tells PEOPLE in the magazine's new issue. "And I hated him for her for years. I see now that this was a vengeful way to pay him back for falling in love with Soon-Yi."

A Family Divided

Moses and Dylan, 28, both adopted by Allen and Farrow, and their brother Ronan, 26, were in the center of a 1993 custody battle in which both sides testified about Allen's affair with Farrow's adopted daughter Soon-Yi Previn, whom Allen went on to marry in 1997. Farrow was awarded custody of the couple's three children. (In total, she has 14 kids from her marriages and solo adoptions.) Allen, 78, who was investigated but not charged with molestation, has for decades denied abusing Dylan, maintaining that Farrow, 69, coached Dylan, an accusation Farrow has always denied.

From left: Ronan Farrow held by Lark Previn, Woody Allen holding Dylan Farrow, Fletcher Previn, Daisy Previn, Soon-Yi Previn, Moses Farrow and Mia Farrow in Leningrad in 1987
JANE READ MARTIN / GLOBE

"Of course Woody did not molest my sister," says Moses, who is estranged from Farrow and many of his siblings and is close to Allen and Soon-Yi. "She loved him and looked forward to seeing him when he would visit. She never hid from him until our mother succeeded in creating the atmosphere of fear and hate towards him. The day in question, there were six or seven of us in the house. We were all in public rooms and no one, not my father or sister, was off in any private spaces. My mother was conveniently out shopping. I don’t know if my sister really believes she was molested or is trying to please her mother. Pleasing my mother was very powerful motivation because to be on her wrong side was horrible."

Dylan's Response

Dylan insists that she is telling the truth.

"This is such a betrayal to me and my whole family," she tells PEOPLE in response to her brother's comments. "My memories are the truth and they are mine and I will live with that for the rest of my life."

"My mother never coached me," Dylan says. "She never planted false memories in my brain. My memories are mine. I remember them. She was distraught when I told her. When I came forward with my story she was hoping against hope that I had made it up. In one of the most heartbreaking conversations I have ever had, she sat me down and asked me if I was telling the truth. She said that Dad said he didn’t do anything. and I said, 'He's lying.' "

Painful Memories

Moses accuses Farrow of bullying him as well. "Our mother has misled the public into believing it was a happy household of both biological and adopted children," he says. "From an early age, my mother demanded obedience and I was often hit as a child. She went into unbridled rages if we angered her, which was intimidating at the very least and often horrifying, leaving us not knowing what she would do."

"I don't know where he gets this about getting beaten," counters Dylan. "We were sent to our rooms sometimes."

"I will not see my family dragged down like this," she adds. "I can't stay silent when my family needs me and I will not abandon them like Soon-Yi and Moses. My brother is dead to me. My mother is so brave and so courageous and taught me what it means to be strong and brave and tell the truth even in the face of these monstrous lies."

Farrow, who declined to respond to Moses's accusations, Tweeted, "I love my daughter. I will always protect her. A lot of ugliness is going to be aimed at me. But this is not about me, it's about her truth."

RELATED: Why Woody Allen Wasn't Prosecuted after Abuse Allegations by Daughter

Moses, a family therapist, says that his own life has been made better by spending time with Allen.

"I think my sister is missing a great deal in life in not reconnecting with her father, who had always adored her," he says. "It’s important that she assert her independence from our mother and not go through life with the false impression that she has been molested by my father. I am very happy I have come into my own power, separating from my mother, which has led to a positive reunion with my father."

'Horrible Tragedy'

Allen's family says that the director is devastated by Dylan's letter.

"This is a horrible, horrible tragedy," Allen's sister Letty Aronson tells PEOPLE. "He feels very badly for Dylan, that she has been so poisoned by her mother."

Dylan, of course, feels very differently.

"I have a wonderful family," she says. "We are brave and we are truthful and anyone who says anything otherwise does not know us."

http://www.people.com/people/article/0,,20783306,00.html

**Mel1973** · February 5th, 2014, 10:41 AM

jesus H. christ! when is this going to stop? pitting sister against brother, father against mother, mother against daughter & daughter against father... is there no fucking limit! just stop it, ALL of you! This is not going to end well for your family. EVERY member will now be forced to choose and align and malign. it's enough.

**sluce** · February 5th, 2014, 10:42 AM

It will die down after award season.

*DIVA! · February 5th, 2014, 10:57 AM

This is ridiculous!! A damn Oscar

**MohandasKGanja** · February 5th, 2014, 11:04 AM

Just wanted to mention that some of Allen's defenders have said that Allen was barely in her life and really didn't have any meaningful contact with her until she was in college. But the photo below is all of them traveling to Leningrad in 1987 when Soon Yi would be 15. That is not to say anything was untoward at that point, only that it's pretty clear that he was part of her life for quite a while.

From left: Ronan Farrow held by Lark Previn, Woody Allen holding Dylan Farrow, Fletcher Previn, Daisy Previn, Soon-Yi Previn, Moses Farrow and Mia Farrow in Leningrad in 1987

**Shinola** · February 5th, 2014, 11:39 AM

Originally Posted by Kittylady

I can pretty much say that my BFF wouldn't go near a 19 year old. I've seen my BFF get freaked and try and lose himself somewhere else in the pub when a girl in her late teens/barely 20's started giving him the eye and he got seriously worried when his niece was teasing him that one of her friends had a crush on him.

Not every guy fantasizes about nailing a 19 year old or similar, particularly when they have got older and wiser and are looking for a woman who is more than just boasting rights and arm candy.

Yep. When I was 19 I regularly got the brush-off from the older men I was attracted to, and it's not because I was unattractive, but because I was too immature for them.