Lisa Niemi opens up about her grief over losing Patrick Swayze

[Miss A]

No, you are never ready for that lost feeling. You'd give anything just to be able to hold their hand again.

[cupcake]

I pray I go before my husband so I dont have to experience that

[Classic Broad]

I thought she should've waited, why did she interview so soon, because of the book? She seemed awfully fragile and under tremendous strain......I just felt sorry that she was doing the interview!
One thing that I thought was kind of scary/odd, is that she said they just never discussed his not beating it. It's almost like he was in denial.
And he died without faith....I think perhaps that is why she said she didn't feel his spirit leave....scary!
I didn't know he'd been an alcoholic and they'd been separated......the alcohol might've had something to do with the pancreatic cancer...that, plus the smoking.
I feel sorry for her, no children.....she must just be devastated beyond belief.
I think she was pushing herself too hard, to appear on the show so soon after his death, I just felt tense for her. Poor thing.

[Slackerbrat]

I feel for her and understand what she is going through. After 27yrs of marriage my hubby died 2 1/2yrs ago. It's the strangest feeling knowing he's gone but you're still here. I'm not a couple anymore I'm just me. I take it day by day and I'm learning how to be a single person. Until recently I didn't even think about wanting another person in my life but I'm starting to want that. Now I have a whole new thing to learn about, dating. Now thats scary......lol

[yanna]

^ Oh Slacker, it must be hard. It took my dad around 2.5 years to consider it. He was scared to death to tell me that he was thinking of dating again and later that he had met someone but I told him that I really wanted him to be happy. He's met someone new and remarried and I'm very happy for him. I don't think it negates what he and my mother had and I wouldn't want him to be alone.

I really hope you'll be able to find someone.

[McJag]

Originally Posted by cupcake

I pray I go before my husband so I dont have to experience that

But Cupcake-then he would have to face it. I think men have an even harder time. I have learned from watching my brave Aunts and Mother face widowhood. My own hubby has had some health scares, so I have really taken notes. They stayed busy. One (in her late 70's) who was married to her total soulmate,is a whirlwind of activity. She teaches water aerobics twice a day. She volunteers, both at a museum and a hospice. She does not visit with the dying (says she can't take that) but with newly widowed. She had her kitchen remodled and got a breast reduction. Has Bonco night every Monday. She gets out & about. The heavy grieving I expected did not happen. She saw him through a long year of suffering,maybe that helped her. So,kind of give it some thought. We never know. One thing I do after a death of the male partner: I send the widow a new set of sheets-girly,ruffled sorts. I thought the hard part would be sleeping alone-this added some fun,ever laughter.

[Slackerbrat]

Thank you yanna for your thoughts.....

Like McJag said I kept really busy and I kept to my regular schedule. I think if I had broke from that I would have totally lost it. Having close friends and family around was a help to. For months after he died I didn't leave the house without tissue cause I never knew when the tears would flow. It was strangest thing I could be anywhere and all of a sudden here they would come then as soon as they would fall they would be gone. I did alot of leaking in those months.

[LynnieD]

^^I'm really sorry Slacker. I cannot imagine. *hugs*

[Slackerbrat]

Thanks Lynnie *hugs* to you....

[McJag]

Slacker, you seem to have your feet on the ground. I hope you fund another special person. I think you will.

[huntersmom]

I saw her on Oprah and my heart goes out to her. She said that she & Patrick split for a year due to...-she was kinda vague about this part but I'm thinking drugs and alcohol. God, I'd bet she'd love that year back with him. Why didn't they have kids? Could they or didn't thay want them?

[HWBL]

Originally Posted by huntersmom

I saw her on Oprah and my heart goes out to her. She said that she & Patrick split for a year due to...-she was kinda vague about this part but I'm thinking drugs and alcohol. God, I'd bet she'd love that year back with him. Why didn't they have kids? Could they or didn't thay want them?

Couldn't have kids. Had multiple miscarriages of which they only mentioned two.
Swayze was a very insecure man, very sensitive. That may have been
somewhat unwittingly caused by his very professional and perfectionistic
mother. Had a very close bond with his dad who died at 57 of a cardiac
arrest. I saw several interview clips of Swayze in which he said he never
thought he was as good as he could have been.

[JadeStar70]

I feel so badly for her. I hope she is doing as well as can be expected.

[stef]

i'm so sorry slacker.

i'm watching the interview on youtube right now... i admire her for being so strong.

just in case anybody else wants to see it...

part 1 : YouTube - Patrick Swayze's Widow Lisa Niemi—Her First Interview - The Oprah Winfrey Show 10/30/2009 Part 1

part 2 : YouTube - Patrick Swayze's Widow Lisa Niemi—Her First Interview - The Oprah Winfrey Show 10/30/2009 Part 2

part 3 : YouTube - Patrick Swayze's Widow Lisa Niemi—Her First Interview - The Oprah Winfrey Show 10/30/2009 Part 3

[AliceInWonderland]

POOR LADY, how she says the grief is on a "cellular level", i can see that and must be how it affects people like Christopher Reeves wife who died so soon after him of something quite shocking for someone her age