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Thread: Kleptoskank Lindsay Lohan Nicks Bling, Evades Jail, Blames Black Kids Everywhere

  1. #4036
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    She's turning 27, so she's going to die this year. That's what she wants anyway.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

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  2. #4037
    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    That'll be so shitty if she does and never faces any real jail time. I'll feel so gypped after all the dumb shit this trick has strung us along with all these years. Why can't the IRS nail her ass?

  3. #4038
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    Quote Originally Posted by NickiDrea View Post
    Actually they do. Sometimes the evidence in a case looks or is overwhelming even where the defendant is innocent (or at least not guilty). In those cases a lawyer might tell the defendant they should plead because they can't win their case. The defendants in those cases usually plead no contest which basically means you are not saying you did it, only that there is evidence against you and that you're choosing not to challenge said evidence.

    Of course in this particular case the evidence is overwhelming and LiLo did it. But I can still see why she chose to plead no contest.
    Yeah, I was just thinking about all the people falsely convicted of violent crimes who are now getting released through DNA evidence or exposure of bad policing. They often plead "no contest" to get out of prison immediately and avoid another trial. It's completely messed up, but some states protect themselves from suits that way.
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  4. #4039
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    I re-read some reviews of Kleptoskank's movies and up until 2007 she got good reviews on her performances except for JUST MY LUCK. But since then its been one big methy slide down to prostitution and pimpin' Ally. The one constant from 2006 on is the fact that her on-set and off-set antics have been legendary. When did White Oprah stop being her momager?

  5. #4040
    Elite Member Bombshell's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nessysuperstar View Post
    . But since then its been one big methy slide down to prostitution and pimpin' Ally.
    "Shopping tip: You can get shoes for a buck at the bowling alley."

  6. #4041
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beeyotch View Post
    That'll be so shitty if she does and never faces any real jail time. I'll feel so gypped after all the dumb shit this trick has strung us along with all these years. Why can't the IRS nail her ass?
    This is gold!!
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  7. #4042
    Elite Member Waterslide's Avatar
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    Sunday, March 24th 2013
    Lindsay Lohan Will Party In Brazil Before Going To Rehab




    Before Lindsay Lohan checks herself into lockdown rehab for 90 days, she's going to fly to Brazil to collect a six-figure check to pose and party at several events. TMZ says that right after LiLo shoots a guest appearance on her sugar daddy's show Anger Management, she's taking her freckled ass to South America. If the California Justice System really wants LiLo to serve that 90 days, they better attach a 6,000 mile-long leash on her ass, because something tells me bitch is going to predictably "lose" her passport or she's going to marry a South American drug lord and stay down there forever. Brazil better close their doors to all things Lohan before they're stuck with her ass.
    LiLo still owes the IRS over $100,000 and since they refused White Oprah's offer to call it even in exchange for Cody Lohan's internal organs, LiLo has to somehow come up with the money. Some source tells TMZ that LiLo made a six-figure deal with a clothing line to promote their shit in Brazil. LiLo leaves on Wednesday. Since TMZ's source's name probably rhymes with Vina Hohan, she's probably exaggerating as usual and by "six-figures" she really means two 8-balls and a half bottle of gin.
    In other LiLo news, TMZ also says that even though she accepted 90 days in rehab, she doesn't think she has a problem with booze and keeps filling her body with the sweet nectar. LiLo was guzzling down vodka sodas just hours after she was sentenced to rehab and she's been partying ever since. On Friday night, LiLo and a friend showed up to a club called FLUXX in San Diego and sat at a VIP table. LiLo apparently didn't want to be seen, because she wore a hoodie sweatshirt and a cap. Several vodkas on the rocks made their way down LiLo's throat and she demanded that the server bring her vodka in a glass carafe, because she didn't want any booze bottles on the table.
    TMZ also reports that a bear shit in the woods on Friday night.
    Lindsay Lohan getting as much booze in her body as she can before she checks into rehab is about as surprising as me spending my Friday night drunkenly watching Showgirls on Cinemax and reciting every single line. I can't do a lot of things while drunk (example: pee standing up), but I can perfectly recite every line in Showgirls.

    Posted by: Michael K
    73 comments

    DrunksDUHLindsay Lohan
    "AND WHEN YOU BECAME DENISE, I TOLD ALL YOUR COLLEAGUES, THOSE CLOWN COMICS, TO FIX THEIR HEARTS OR DIE."

  8. #4043
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    Quote Originally Posted by Beeyotch View Post
    That'll be so shitty if she does and never faces any real jail time. I'll feel so gypped after all the dumb shit this trick has strung us along with all these years. Why can't the IRS nail her ass?
    That "six figure check" will go right into the IRS hands. If she's earning, the tax folks get their's. There's no criminal activity like hiding income, or illegal earnings (see Wesley Snipes). I am waiting to see if she makes a break from rehab, like she did at Betty Ford.

  9. #4044
    Elite Member MontanaMama's Avatar
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    No the IRS doesn't and no it probably won't. Lindsay has to actively write a check to the IRS each quarter based on her estimated earnings for taxes due next year. Of course she doesn't do that and that's why she owes so much to the government. There's no automatic withholding or employer liability as between pimps, johns and whores.
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  10. #4045
    Elite Member Brookie's Avatar
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    South America? Maybe she'll get kidnapped.

    Naaaaaaaaaaahhh, we can't get that lucky.
    Life is short. Break the Rules. Forgive Quickly. Kiss Slowly. Love Truly.
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  11. #4046
    Elite Member Bombshell's Avatar
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    I want to write "This will end badly". But the last time I did that was on the Mindy McCready thread. And...yeah.
    "Shopping tip: You can get shoes for a buck at the bowling alley."

  12. #4047
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    Lindsay Lohan -- 'Lockdown Rehab' Doesn't Exist | TMZ.com


    Lindsay Lohan
    Lockdown Rehab
    Doesn't Exist

    Exclusive

    Lindsay Lohan
    struck a plea deal she CANNOT fulfill, because TMZ has learned ... the lockdown rehab she promised to do is a fiction.

    Fact is ... there appear to be no non-jail rehab facilities that will keep patients in against their will -- anywhere in the U.S..

    Sources connected with the case tell TMZ ... Lindsay's lawyer, Mark Heller, represented to prosecutors he could get his client into a 90-day lockdown rehab center in NYC. As we reported, there are no private NY rehab centers that keep patients against their will, except for one connected with the prison system, and you have to have a felony record to get in -- and Lindsay doesn't.

    We also checked to see if Lindsay could complete her 90-day lockdown rehab in CA, but there isn't a single non-jail lockdown rehab facility in the State.

    Rehab guru Dr. Drew tells TMZ, "There is no rehab that will hold you against your will, unless they feel the person is a suicide risk, and in that case they can hold the individual for 72 hours."

    Here's the BIG problem. Lindsay's actual sentence is 90 days in jail, but the judge said he'd allow her to complete it with lockdown rehab. Sources say the prosecutors believed such a facility was available when they offered the plea deal.

    It would seem a typical 90-day rehab program wouldn't cut it. Lindsay has been there at least twice before. She constantly snuck out of Cirque Lodge in Utah and allegedly did the same thing at Betty Ford in California.

    On top of that, Lindsay continues to drink, as recently as Friday.

    We're told prosecutors are reevaluating the plea deal to determine what they want to do. Sources say the jail option is still on the table.
    Rest in Peace my beautiful little Bonnie

    07/01/92 - 12/03/09

  13. #4048
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    That was posted a few pages back and they have already provided clarification.
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  14. #4049
    Elite Member roslyntaberfan's Avatar
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    ^^I saw that post a few days ago but this post has only gone up on TMZ today: I assumed it was confirming that there definitely isn't a lockdown rehab so thought it would be of interest.
    Rest in Peace my beautiful little Bonnie

    07/01/92 - 12/03/09

  15. #4050
    Elite Member dksnj's Avatar
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    Wonder if:

    1) Her lawyer knew this all along and was trying to get one over
    2) Her 90 day rehab will be converted to jail time

    Dumb bitch should have taken the earlier plea of house arrest.
    Vera Donovan: (Dolores Claiborne) : Sometimes you have to be a high-riding bitch to survive. Sometimes being a bitch is all a woman has to hold onto.

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