Kleptoskank Lindsay Lohan Nicks Bling, Evades Jail, Blames Black Kids Everywhere

**twitchy2.0** · September 21st, 2012, 01:18 PM

Originally Posted by CornFlakegrl

I don't think it's her. Per the website:

" (Also, regarding the pics, we didn’t have any new ones of Lindsay, so we went six months into the future and got these. No biggie.)"

Oh thank goodness. Though I can totally see her looking like this in six months if she is still alive.

**msdeb** · September 21st, 2012, 01:20 PM

Originally Posted by snoopqueen

Lovely picture of Lilo here.

http://cdn04.cdn.thesuperficial.com/...an-600x450.jpg

LOL!!! she looks like Mickey Rourke

**mjw** · September 21st, 2012, 01:28 PM

As we all saw on the anti-drug PSA episode of Dr. Phil, White Oprah is not only the epitome of a responsible mother, but she's also a role model to all young women and she knows this which is why she'd never EVER party with her own daughter. The NYDN went from Long Island bar to Long Island bar and eventually they found White Oprah slumped under a pay phone while yelling at the cord dangling in front of her for calling her a bad mother. They waved half of a Xanax at her face, which made her slur out, "Half a Xanax? That'll get you one handy with a spit job. Drop 'em." When the NYDN told her they wanted to ask her a few questions instead, she agreed! It's nice to know that wherever you are and whatever you're doing, White Oprah is probably spitting out the opposite of the truth to some reporter.

On if she's true that she boozed it up with her daughter on her birthday: “My 80-year-old mother was there, and she’s Italian-American, and to be able to have a glass of red wine there for her is normal for our family. “Some people who want to quit drinking do it cold turkey and some do it gradually — you want to keep a balance. I don’t know what’s a right way or a wrong way.”

On how all of the illegal shit LiLo does should be blamed on her assistant Gavin: “I have questions about Gavin. There have been numerous incidents with Lindsay where he has been present. He was with her recently at [millionaire Sam Magid’s] party when she was falsely accused of burglarizing jewelry. It’s all very sketchy.”

On how she totally doesn't party with her daughter: “I don’t party with Lindsay. In the early years, I would go with her to clubs, because I wanted to see who the enablers were.”

"Because I wanted to see who enablers were." This bitch is a master at turning excuses out of a bull's colon into one hundred percent comedy! That really is a good line and she should take it even further."I only downed that entire bottle of vodka, because I wanted to make sure my SOBER daughter wasn't tempted! I only stole that money out of my daughter's purse, because I didn't want anybody else to steal it out of her purse! I only did all those lines on the table, because I wanted to make sure it was crushed Tic Tacs and not coke! It was coke!"

And here's LiLo carrying Vikram Chatwal's child in NYC last night. Vikram Chatwal is that really rich "friend" of LiLo's. Either that boy is getting second-hand high from being that close to LiLo's face or his tummy hurts from all the diamond rings she made him swallow at Cartier.

White Oprah Does Not Party With Lindsay Lohan | Dlisted

more pics at link

**NVash** · September 21st, 2012, 01:36 PM

Is Lindsay duckfacing?

**pinkbunnyslippers** · September 21st, 2012, 01:38 PM

^ I hate her lips. Well at least she isn't doing the head scratch pose.
The both look like they are fucked up on something. They probably call Valium or Xanax, vitamins.

**nancydrew** · September 21st, 2012, 01:43 PM

Dina always brings the lols. Is Gavin black? Because if so, I am going to piss my pants.

**NVash** · September 21st, 2012, 01:44 PM

So Perez says Goodyears offered Lindsay and Amanda driving lessons. Someone get the right people together and make this a reality show!

**louiswinthorpe111** · September 21st, 2012, 02:02 PM

Celebrity Driving Rehab?

**Chilly Willy** · September 21st, 2012, 02:21 PM

Shitty trailers for all! Found the poor-foreigners-link:

Liz & Dick Teaser OV - FILMSTARTS.de

**rollo** · September 21st, 2012, 02:28 PM

^ Thanks, Chilly. Now we know Liz Taylor had duck lips.

So Dina goes to clubs with Lindsay to look for enablers and she takes her youngest son with her so he can help!

**twitchy2.0** · September 21st, 2012, 02:31 PM

Originally Posted by Chilly Willy

Shitty trailers for all! Found the poor-foreigners-link:

Liz & Dick Teaser OV - FILMSTARTS.de

now we need a poor-foreigners-with-apple-products link. May Steve Jobs burn in hell for all eternity.

**Chilly Willy** · September 21st, 2012, 02:35 PM

Ugh, no can do. Steve Jobs is a fucking mobster. People are so stupid for worshipping him like a saint.

**mjw** · September 21st, 2012, 04:34 PM

When we saw the poster for "Liz & Dick," the upcoming Lifetime movie starring Lindsay Lohan as Elizabeth Taylor, we found it to be a magical creation. The fine folks at Lifetime seemed to be drawing parallels between Lohan's career and that of Taylor, but we simply don't think they went far enough.

Luckily, we have PhotoShop.
'Liz & Dick' Poster Gets Lindsay Lohan-Themed Parody It Deserves (PICTURE)

**NVash** · September 22nd, 2012, 02:50 PM

^ They spelled 'daughter' wrong that first time.

I saw that trailer last night and Im just flabbergasted. It barely showed her talking and when she did she sounded like she had cotton in her mouth. This movie is going to be a steaming hot mess. I need a DVR ASAP.