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Thread: Kleptoskank Lindsay Lohan Nicks Bling, Evades Jail, Blames Black Kids Everywhere

  1. #2431
    Elite Member smurfette's Avatar
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    LINDSEY LOHAN ARRESTED, ALLEGEDLY FLED SCENE OF ACCIDENT


    Lindsay Lohan was arrested for leaving the scene of an accident this morning after allegedly clipping a pedestrian in downtown Manhattan ... TMZ has learned.

    Law enforcement sources tell TMZ, Lindsay was pulling in to park her Porsche Cayenne near the Dream Hotel in downtown NYC when -- at a very low speed -- she allegedly hit the knee of a 30-something year old guy. That was around 2AM ET.

    We're told one of Lindsay's passengers in the SUV got out and checked the car for damage ... and then LiLo and co. went inside the hotel.

    We're told someone called police while Lindsay was inside ... and when she walked out of the hotel -- around 2:30AM ET -- officers arrested her.

    According to our sources ... Lindsay was booked for leaving the scene of an accident -- a misdemeanor -- and then released with a desk appearance ticket ... meaning she did not have to pay bail before release.

    We're told alcohol was not involved.

    We're told the alleged victim was actually hospitalized ... however, he was not knocked down or dragged ... and didn't have any visible injuries.

    This arrest could absolutely trigger a probation violation in Lindsay's jewelry theft case because one of the conditions of probation is she OBEY ALL LAWS.

    Even without a conviction, Judge Stephanie Sautner -- the judge in the jewelry theft case -- could haul Lindsay's butt into court if there's probable cause to believe she committed a crime.

    Read more: Celebrity Gossip | Entertainment News | Celebrity News | TMZ.com

  2. #2432
    Elite Member Mel1973's Avatar
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    but.... I thought ALL of her problems were due to her NOT being in New York - so HOW could this be true?
    greysfang and Lobelia like this.

  3. #2433
    Elite Member MontanaMama's Avatar
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    That does seem odd, in New York peolpe do not leap in front of your car just to be near an actor's talent.
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    Elite Member CornFlakegrl's Avatar
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    Maybe there is more to this story because I'm not buying it as is.

    She's parking her car and going very slowly (per the article) and the pedestrian doesn't see her or move out of the way? I know he has the right of way but c'mon. Then her pasenger gets out of the car to check for damage? How much damage can a knee do to a car? I'm betting they got out to check the pedestrian. Who said he was fine until he realized a few minutes later it was Lindsey Lohan that hit him.

    Lord knows she's a fucktard but this story doesn't add up for me.
    *DIVA!, camillacamilla and Syd like this.

  5. #2435
    Elite Member Mel1973's Avatar
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    hopefully, Amanda Bynes will tweet a big ol' "HA HA BITCH!" to her!
    *DIVA!, Sunrider and darksithbunny like this.

  6. #2436
    mjw
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    Just When You Were Starting To Think That It's Been A While Since Lindsay Lohan's Ass Got Arrested

    Because Lindsay Lohan had to remind everyone that she's the original fuck up, she got put into handcuffs at 2:30 this morning in NYC after she allegedly hit a 30-year-old dude with her Porsche Cayenne. When you hit someone with your car, you (who I'm assuming doesn't have White Oprah genes and brains made of coagulated coke balls) check to see if the dude is alright, give him a swig from the flask you keep between your titties and then scream for an ambulance if his ass needs one. But when Blohan hits a dude, she makes her passenger check to see if her SUV has any gross blood stains or whatever on it and then she just sashays into her hotel, because there's a line of the bad shit waiting for her in her room and she doesn't want it to get cold (or she didn't want to keep her john waiting). Let's all lubricate our tonsils with liquid caffeine and scream together now: THIS BITCH! The worst part of waking up is LiLo fucking up.

    TMZ says that LiLo was trying to park her Porsche Cayenne near the Dream Hotel at around 12:30 this morning when she ran into the dude's knee. After LiLo ignored the dude and walked into the Dream Hotel, someone called the police. The Police put the freckled terror in handcuffs as soon as she walked out of the hotel two hours later. The dumbass was booked for leaving the scene of an accident and she was later released without having to pay bail. The cops gave her a desk appearance ticket. Surprisingly, the police don't believe that the sweet nectar was running through her veins when she nearly took a bitch out. The victim was taken to the hospital to be checked out, but he had no visible injuries.

    LiLo is still on probation for stealing that necklace, so this latest act of dumb fuckery could get her a ticket back to court in L.A.

    In related news, Amanda Bynes, SpongeBob and the rest of the Nickelodeon gang were seen outside of the hospital giving the victim a stack of money and thanking him for a job well done. That's what bitch gets for fucking with SpongeBob.

    SpongeBob: 3
    Mickey Mouse: ZERO!

    And when asked for a comment, White Oprah said:

    "This would've never happened if she was in New York!"
    "But White Oprah, this happened in New York."
    "....Your shoes look silly!"

    Posted by: Michael K
    Just When You Were Starting To Think That It's Been A While Since Lindsay Lohan's Ass Got Arrested | Dlisted

    Update from TMZ:

    UPDATE: Lindsay is telling friends she never knew she hit anybody and it wasn't until she came out and got arrested that she knew anything was going on.

    As for the story about one of the passengers in her SUV checking for damages, she says it never happened. Nobody ever got out of the car.

    Lohan says it's "really fishy" the guy has no visible injuries and she feels she's the victim of a set up. She's not going to let the incident go and is planning on fighting it to the end.

    Read more: http://www.tmz.com#ixzz26v7EvvGK

  7. #2437
    Elite Member Mel1973's Avatar
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    more reasons for me to love Michael K:
    In related news, Amanda Bynes, SpongeBob and the rest of the Nickelodeon gang were seen outside of the hospital giving the victim a stack of money and thanking him for a job well done. That's what bitch gets for fucking with SpongeBob.

    SpongeBob: 3
    Mickey Mouse: ZERO!

    And when asked for a comment, White Oprah said:

    "This would've never happened if she was in New York!"
    "But White Oprah, this happened in New York."
    "....Your shoes look silly!"

  8. #2438
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    Hope the Dream Hotel got payment in advance.
    darksithbunny and Seapharris7 like this.
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  9. #2439
    fgg
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mel1973 View Post
    hopefully, Amanda Bynes will tweet a big ol' "HA HA BITCH!" to her!
    methinks somebody was jealous of all the attention amanda was getting...
    can't post pics because my computer's broken and i'm stupid

  10. #2440
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Un fucking believable. And again, nothing will happen to the teflon crackhead.
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

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  11. #2441
    Elite Member Love love's Avatar
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    Hahahahahahahaahahha

  12. #2442
    Elite Member louiswinthorpe111's Avatar
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    OMG, I stayed at the Dream Hotel when I was in NYC.

    To Lindsay's credit, that road that's in front of the hotel IS kinda narrow.

    Didn't the dude that got hit yell at her when it happened? I know if someone hit me, I'd yell, "Hey you dumb bitch, did you not see me?"
    nancydrew likes this.
    RELIGION: Treat it like it's your genitalia. Don't show it off in public, and don't shove it down your children's throats.

  13. #2443
    Elite Member Mel1973's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by greysfang View Post
    Un fucking believable. And again, nothing will happen to the teflon crackhead.
    I have a coworker that I've dubbed the "teflon turd"..

  14. #2444
    Elite Member dksnj's Avatar
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    Me thinks the title thread is going to have to be updated to include 'plays the victim'

  15. #2445
    Elite Member SHELLEE's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mel1973 View Post
    I have a coworker that I've dubbed the "teflon turd"..
    I'm going to have to steal this for a few of my own coworkers.
    See, Whores, we are good for something. Love, Florida
    #fingersinthebootyassbitch

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