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Thread: Kleptoskank Lindsay Lohan Nicks Bling, Evades Jail, Blames Black Kids Everywhere

  1. #1921
    Elite Member NVash's Avatar
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    Saturday, August 4th 2012
    Scary Movie, Indeed



    Expect to see the headline "Los Angeles All Out Of Crack Rocks" when Scary Movie 5 starts shooting, because mess and messier will both be on the set, together. Lindsay Lohan's comeback tour has already hit a basic cable disaster, a low-budget soft-core porn and now it'll be hitting a piece of cinematic mastery that will probably win all the Razzies. E! News says that LiLo has officially signed on to do Scary Movie 5 and Charlie Sheen's character will be back for more foolery. The Warlock and Crackzilla, together at last. Everybody run! I would say that this means The Rapture is definitely coming, but even the Four Horsemen and a swarm of locusts don't want to be around when those two wrecks get together.

    The only good that can come from this is if LiLo and Charlie run out of the bad shit and booze during filming and start to turn on each other. You know how in Wackiki Wabbit when those two starving castaways are so delirious with hunger that they start to imagine each other as delicious food? That's totally going to happen to LiLo and Charlie. Their trailers will be completely dry of all mind-altering substances and they'll start to go delirious as they sober up. LiLo will then picture Charlie as a fat line of coke and snort him up. Let's hope that happens.

    And here's some backstage footage from the future of LiLo and Charlie on set together:

    [YOUTUBE]UBhQhKWOZmk[/YOUTUBE]

    Posted by: Michael K

    Source: Scary Movie, Indeed | Dlisted
    This will be a hot mess of epic proportions.

    Ill watch it.

  2. #1922
    Elite Member SoCalMarie's Avatar
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    The first thing that came to mind when I read this:
    It's highly probable they are going to eventually bang each other.

    I just made myself dry-heave with that mental picture.
    sprynkles and Stereo Inferno like this.

  3. #1923
    Elite Member MontanaMama's Avatar
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    And it was important for you to now have us all upchucking?
    sprynkles likes this.
    If i hear one more personal attack, i will type while drunk, then you can cry! - Bugdoll
    (716): I'd call her a cunt, but she doesn't seem to have the depth or warmth
    Quote Originally Posted by shedevilang View Post
    (Replying to MontanaMama) This is some of the smartest shit I ever read

  4. #1924
    Elite Member NVash's Avatar
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    Kind of off topic but she didnt look that good filming Machete two years ago either. How long has she been looking so haggard?

  5. #1925
    Elite Member MontanaMama's Avatar
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    She's so edgy and cool. I am awed by the sheer awesomeness of the photoshopping skillz displayed. Too bad her face is still visible.
    SoCalMarie likes this.
    If i hear one more personal attack, i will type while drunk, then you can cry! - Bugdoll
    (716): I'd call her a cunt, but she doesn't seem to have the depth or warmth
    Quote Originally Posted by shedevilang View Post
    (Replying to MontanaMama) This is some of the smartest shit I ever read

  6. #1926
    Bronze Member zzzz_what's Avatar
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    Somebody gonna die.

  7. #1927
    Elite Member MsChiff's Avatar
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    the warlock and crackzilla

  8. #1928
    Elite Member SoCalMarie's Avatar
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    As a little comparison....just to see if those Machete photos were a tad photoshopped.

    The following 2 photos were taken less than 2 months later - in Oct. 2009

    Nah.....totally not photoshopped


  9. #1929
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    Come on, nothing a few fillers didn't fix in a jiffy!

    http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-IbCUNnR2Y7...ess%2BUgly.jpg


  10. #1930
    Elite Member faithanne's Avatar
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    Was this taken at the airport as she's about to board a plane? Because it looks like she's taped her stash under her chin to get through Customs.
    Stereo Inferno and snoopqueen like this.
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  11. #1931
    Gold Member lucianodel's Avatar
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    Well, she's going through playing prostitutes... in a few months she'll be playing either white trash mothers or old spinsters... because to play women her age she will need some serious CGI, and I mean, CGI, not some camera filter...

    or she'll end up playing 20 year olds looking 80 like Mae West in "Sexette".

  12. #1932
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    Those lips look obscene.

  13. #1933
    Silver Member Jana's Avatar
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    Why a zoomed picture! I still can't believe she looks like this at 26.

  14. #1934
    Elite Member Mrs P's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by NVash View Post
    [URL="http://lindsaylohanfrance.blogspot.com/2010/08/lindsay-lohan-photoshoot-pour-machete.html"]Kind of off topic but she didnt look that good filming Machete two years ago either. How long has she been looking so haggard?

    Quote Originally Posted by SoCalMarie View Post
    As a little comparison....just to see if those Machete photos were a tad photoshopped.

    The following 2 photos were taken less than 2 months later - in Oct. 2009

    Nah.....totally not photoshopped

    I noticed that in most of the movie her lips were normal and then in some scenes you could see she got injections. Was very odd. I want to think there was a news story that they had to re-shoot some scenes, so it must have been after the duck lips.

  15. #1935
    Elite Member Laurent's Avatar
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    Lindsay Lohan Causes Trouble at Francesca Eastwood's Birthday Bash

    Celebrity News
    August 10, 2012 AT 12:30PM
    By UsWeekly Staff


    Lindsay Lohan and Francesca Eastwood
    Credit: NICHOLAS KAMM/AFP/GettyImages; Donato Sardella/WireImage.com

    Lindsay Lohan isn't okay with sharing the spotlight at her favorite Hollywood night club.

    A source tells Us Weekly that the Liz & Dick actress, 25, appeared to be back to her old, headline-making antics at Bootsy Bellows on Tuesday night -- and put a wrench in E! reality star Francesca Eastwood's birthday bash.

    "Francesca was celebrating her birthday with around a dozen friends in a private area when Lindsay came over and started screaming that Francesca should leave," the source says. "She was yelling 'I'm a star, she's a nobody, get her out of here!'"

    The source continues, "One poor guy came over and tried to calm [Lindsay] down and she acted aggressively. At that point the security told her to leave and it was totally embarrassing. She is acting like some bad '80s film star, and it is hard to watch because she needs help."

    But before Lohan embarked on her journey home, she and her party made one more cringe-worthy snafu.

    "Lindsay's friend was driving and they sped out and almost hit one of the valet guys," a witness tells Us.

    The Mean Girls actress has spent the summer hard at work on her upcoming Elizabeth Taylor biopic, in which she stars opposite Grant Bowler as Richard Burton. In June, an on-set source told Us that Lohan made no buts about hiding her chain smoking habits to soothe her nerves.

    "Literally every time she finishes a scene she lights up another cigarette," the source explained. "You can hear the crew saying, 'That's cut -- get a cigarette for Lindsay.' In between takes she would sit on the director's chair puffing on her cigarettes. Lindsay has been working hard, but without the nicotine she probably could not make it through as she appears stressed at times and they do seem to calm her down."
    Read more: Lindsay Lohan Causes Trouble at Francesca Eastwood's Birthday Bash - UsMagazine.com
    “What are you looking at, sugar-tits?” - Mel Gibson

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