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Thread: Kleptoskank Lindsay Lohan Nicks Bling, Evades Jail, Blames Black Kids Everywhere

  1. #1501
    Elite Member MontanaMama's Avatar
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    ^^Yes she did. She's not getting any smarter, is she?
    If i hear one more personal attack, i will type while drunk, then you can cry! - Bugdoll
    (716): I'd call her a cunt, but she doesn't seem to have the depth or warmth
    Quote Originally Posted by shedevilang View Post
    (Replying to MontanaMama) This is some of the smartest shit I ever read

  2. #1502
    Elite Member rollo's Avatar
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    And I bet she thought about sending flowers to the morgue too.

  3. #1503
    Elite Member Novice's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sluce View Post


    Looks like someone managed to get there on time today...
    What time did she get up to curl that haystack?
    Quote Originally Posted by sluce View Post
    The the stories are already seeping out of the morgue. lol

    Lindsay Lohan Morgue Duty
    I See Dead People



    Lindsay Lohan won't be touching any dead bodies during her stint on morgue duty this morning ... but TMZ has learned she's already come face to face with a real not-live human corpse.

    Sources tell us ... Lindsay is on sheet-washing duty ... and she covered her mouth in horror when she first laid eyes on the blood and fluid stained linens.

    We're told ... during her shift, Lindsay saw a dead body in the morgue and seemed "shocked."

    Lohan has just moved on to toilet duty.

    Sources also tell us Lindsay appears to be in good spirits ... is talking to other people in her group ... and is maintaining a positive attitude.

    As we previously reported, Lindsay has been ordered to complete 16 hours in the morgue per week until her next hearing.
    I guess she doesn't wash her own sheets? Coz they don't sound any different to what she'd have on her bed.

    Quote Originally Posted by gardenwitch View Post
    I really, really like this guy. Him and the judge should go hang out. They seem to not be blinded by her being a "celebrity"
    It's very refreshing!!
    There have probably had bigger names working at the morgue for DUIs etc than Lindsay. And let's face it, we're all equal in death.
    Free Charmed.

  4. #1504
    Elite Member dksnj's Avatar
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    Lindsay Lohan
    I Worked My Ass Off
    At The Morgue



    Lindsay Lohan
    didn't want to be a stiff during her first day at the morgue ...so she went in and washed soiled linens, scrubbed toilets and seemed to enjoy her time with the other volunteers ... sources tell TMZ.

    We're told LiLo said she felt "terrible" about showing up late and being such a distraction on Thursday, so she went to bed early to avoid a repeat performance.

    Lindsay, we're told, didn't act like a spoiled brat. Like so many of her friends, she got down on her hands and knees .... and cleaned floors. She even socialized with some of the other volunteers.

    As for the whole burger and cupcake thing ... Lindsay told friends she wasn't trying to bribe anyone ... but the gesture was just another way to show the staff how sorry she was for being late the day before.


    LOL

  5. #1505
    Elite Member Dean James's Avatar
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    Well, yay. Don't think that makes up for 6 years of fuckery though.
    Baby, by the time you have kids and they're in school, no one will care about you.

  6. #1506
    Elite Member MontanaMama's Avatar
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    considering she has to work 16 hours a week for the next 2 weeks, I'd be surprised if she follows through next week.
    If i hear one more personal attack, i will type while drunk, then you can cry! - Bugdoll
    (716): I'd call her a cunt, but she doesn't seem to have the depth or warmth
    Quote Originally Posted by shedevilang View Post
    (Replying to MontanaMama) This is some of the smartest shit I ever read

  7. #1507
    Elite Member rollo's Avatar
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    Exactly. Does she really have to brief her 'sources' after one day?

  8. #1508
    Elite Member Kat Scorp's Avatar
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    WTF is TMZ talking about with the "soiled linens"? Blohan isn't trained to handle hazardous waste, and the coroners usually use plastic wrap.
    What do we want?
    EVIDENCE BASED SCIENCE
    When do we want it?
    AFTER PEER REVIEW

  9. #1509
    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    Yeah, I'm leaning towards thinking that's the dead giveaway that Blohan is TMZ's "source" who's feeding them these "exclusives." God would TMZ be that stupid?

  10. #1510
    Elite Member Kat Scorp's Avatar
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    ... Yes, yes they would be
    What do we want?
    EVIDENCE BASED SCIENCE
    When do we want it?
    AFTER PEER REVIEW

  11. #1511
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    The probation dept spokesperson listed washing linens as a job performed by the people doing time at the morgue.
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

  12. #1512
    Elite Member Kat Scorp's Avatar
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    Awww Sluce, here I was in my hating fun and you went and got all reasonable.
    What do we want?
    EVIDENCE BASED SCIENCE
    When do we want it?
    AFTER PEER REVIEW

  13. #1513
    Elite Member SoCalMarie's Avatar
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    We're told ... during her shift, Lindsay saw a dead body in the morgue and seemed "shocked."

    Lohan has just moved on to toilet duty.
    Sources also tell us Lindsay appears to be in good spirits ... is talking to other people in her group ... and is maintaining a positive attitude.
    Ba-Dum-Tisssssss
    Get It? Morgue..... Good Spirits.... Oh those writers are so crafty....

  14. #1514
    Elite Member greysfang's Avatar
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    Spirits=booze. Get it? Lilo and booze?
    FUCK YOU AND GIVE ME MY GODDAMN VENTI TWO PUMP LIGHT WHIP MOCHA YOU COCKSUCKING WHORE BEFORE I PUNCH YOU IN THE MOUTH. I just get unpleasant in my car. - Deej

    http://www.gossiprocks.com/forum/signaturepics/sigpic4098_9.gif Healthy is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.

  15. #1515
    Elite Member FashionVictim's Avatar
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    Come on, Linds, I need another DUI or at least an od.

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