There some really funny parts in this roast. Especially Carl Reiner at 30 mins.
Last edited by sluce; September 5th, 2014 at 03:38 PM.
You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl
wow, she's so young in some of those pics. Melissa is the spitting image of Joan when Joan was younger.
LOVED the CNN interview and she was right, that interviewer was really annoying.
I've never seen Joan on Hollywood Squares so it's interesting to see her like that.
I am in US Central Time and NBC has a nice show on her right now.
I saw ABC is doing a special at 10.
You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl
I can only imagine what it was like to open your door and have Joan Rivers bringing you Thanksgiving dinner!! Wow she's gone!
I don''t know if she really fucked the board though. Maybe just put the tip in. -Mrs. Dark
Joan Rivers’ Funeral Will Not Be The Dramatic, Showbiz Extravaganza She Wanted It To Be (UPDATE)
September 5, 2014 / Posted by: Michael K 129
Joan Rivers joked (or was it a joke?) in her memoirs I Hate Everyone….Starting With Me that when she goes up to Heaven to talk shit about the angels, she wants a Norma Desmond-approved, novella-inspired ultra dramatic,
over-the-top, grand funeral involving glamour, tons of fucking sequins and Meryl Streep jumping from her Deer Hunter
character to her A Cry In The Dark character to her Sophie’s Choice character. Joan wrote that she
didn’t want a quiet, tasteful, boring ass funeral. She wanted hired abuelitas in black veils throwing
themselves on her casket before pall-bearers (aka drag queens wearing her looks throughout the years) carry
her out of the Kodak Theater and into a swarm of paparazzi punching each other to get pictures of her. Joan put it like this:
When I die (and yes, Melissa, that day will come; and yes, Melissa, everything’s in your name), I want
my funeral to be a huge showbiz affair with lights, cameras, action . . . . I want craft services, I want paparazzi
and I want publicists making a scene! I want it to be Hollywood all the way. I don’t want some rabbi rambling on; I
want Meryl Streep crying, in five different accents. I don’t want a eulogy; I want Bobby Vinton to pick up my head
and sing “Mr. Lonely.” I want to look gorgeous, better dead than I do alive. I want to be buried in a Valentino gown and I want Harry Winston to make me a toe tag. And I want a wind machine so that even in the casket my hair is blowing
just like Beyoncé’s.
Well, Joan’s funeral is on Sunday and sadly Meryl Streep is not going to win her fourth Oscar for it and it
won’t be scene. Joan’s rep tells E! that her funeral will happen at Temple Emanu-El in Manhattan. It’s going to be private, invitation-only and no press is allowed. Mourners won’t see who Joan Rivers was caught dead in, because
her casket will be closed. They’re basically doing the opposite of what Joan wanted! How dreadful. They
should at least honor one of Joan’s wishes by burying her in panties with a picture of George Clooney’s mouth
on the crotch patch.
Update: UsWeekly says that there will be a red carpet at Joan’s funeral
and she will be buried with it. Nobody tell Chelsea Handler, because if that bitch finds out she’s going to piss on it.
Dlisted | Be Very Afraid | Page 2
I don''t know if she really fucked the board though. Maybe just put the tip in. -Mrs. Dark
I'm surprised and kinda sad it's not going to be over the top. I can't say I blame Melissa for wanting it low key though.
See, Whores, we are good for something. Love, Florida
#fingersinthebootyassbitch
well, if joan wanted a funeral service at a temple, it would have to be low key. not sure there's a way around that.
but anything goes for a shiva. still gotta cover the mirrors, though ....
^^I know it's custom but so you think they'll even sit Shiva??
I don''t know if she really fucked the board though. Maybe just put the tip in. -Mrs. Dark
I seriously doubt Melissa will sit Shiva in the traditional manner.
You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl
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