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Thread: Jill Duggar and Derick Dillard's Wedding Registry Includes Guns, Cereal and Duct Tape

  1. #31
    Gold Member ChloroformCasey's Avatar
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    This is gonna make for some very weird first sex. She will lie there in a flannel nighty still as a stone and he'll explode before he gets her chastity belt off. Hot times!
    "Like when I host a party. I hope my guests get along. But if not, how interesting!"
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  2. #32
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    someone needs to post that gif of the most awkward fundie wedding kiss ever. it was epic.
    Fly_On_TheWall likes this.
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  3. #33
    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

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  4. #34
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    holy fuck it's even worse than i remembered
    Just Kill Me likes this.
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  5. #35
    Elite Member llamamama's Avatar
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    I just love the guest laughing in that gif.
    sputnik and C_is_for_Cookie like this.

  6. #36
    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    I wanna see their sex tape... for the lulz.
    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

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  7. #37
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    ^^comedy gold.
    i bet he came in her belly button until they figured out it was the wrong hole.
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

  8. #38
    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

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    "What's traitors, precious?" -- President Gollum

  9. #39
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    Quote Originally Posted by ChloroformCasey View Post
    This is gonna make for some very weird first sex. She will lie there in a flannel nighty still as a stone and he'll explode before he gets her chastity belt off. Hot times!
    I remember watching a documentary once about a virgin couple getting married. That is, he was a virgin, she was a born again virgin (she had had sex, but went celibate for some time).
    Anyway, it was so much fun watching their priest trying to explain sex to them (him? supposedly the woman already knew). He said, men are microwave ovens, and women are slow cookers. Alas out virgin guy did not get the analogy, and after their wedding night, they explained how the sex had been. Him: "It was great!" Her: "I hope it gets better with time. I'm sure it gets better".
    Yeah, I lol'ed
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  10. #40
    Elite Member *DIVA!'s Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sputnik View Post
    ^^comedy gold.
    i bet he came in her belly button until they figured out it was the wrong hole.
    Screaming Laughing!!!!
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    I don''t know if she really fucked the board though. Maybe just put the tip in. -Mrs. Dark

  11. #41
    Elite Member Moongirl's Avatar
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    One of our OB-Gyn's actually did have a couple once who came in for an infertility consult; turned out they were having sex incorrectly, and that's why she wasn't getting pregnant. I have no idea how they were doing it...
    snoopqueen and JazzyGirl like this.

  12. #42
    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    I would pay to have the obgyn spill the details. I wonder what they thought they were supposed to be doing. I mean, how confusing can it be? Wrong hole? Frottage only? Lying together tenderly and thinking of the stork?

  13. #43
    Elite Member Moongirl's Avatar
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    I'll need to ask one of his assistants to give me more details...
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  14. #44
    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    Yes! Report back!

  15. #45
    Elite Member gas_chick's Avatar
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    The dress doesn't fit. Is that supposed to be modest???
    C_is_for_Cookie likes this.
    I am going to come and burn the fucking house down... but you will blow me first."

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