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Thread: Hell freezes over. Oh, and George Clooney is engaged.

  1. #316
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    It's a personal choice. Just be aware of the implications and origins of that tradition, and the fact that it does reinforce patriarchal norms, and then decide if you are ok with it. And like I said, I get that it's a choice. But I personally hate the tradition and what it stands for.
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  2. #317
    Elite Member CornFlakegrl's Avatar
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    I wonder if Angelina is quickly strategizing to up her game. Aman is what Angelina aspires to be, no? Smart, pedigreed, involved at high political levels in international affairs and now, all the access fame can afford.
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  3. #318
    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    CZB-

    for an example -some friends when mentioned would always be called by both first and last names. Im one of those people, like if you asked someone that knew me 'who was at the party last night?' they would say 'Joe, Jill, Witchcurlgirl X, Robert, Donna, Sam Cohl'. Sam and I are firsty lastys because no one ever says just Sam or Wcg.

    We never figured out how you become one, we just noticed for certain people it always how you thought of them.



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  4. #319
    czb
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    ^^^ ah, got it. never heard it called 'firsty, lasty' before.

    TY

  5. #320
    Elite Member Bellatheball's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sputnik View Post
    It's a personal choice. Just be aware of the implications and origins of that tradition, and the fact that it does reinforce patriarchal norms, and then decide if you are ok with it. And like I said, I get that it's a choice. But I personally hate the tradition and what it stands for.
    I will give give you the benefit of the doubt and assume you didn't mean that to be as patronizing as it sounds.
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  6. #321
    Silver Member South Lake's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Bellatheball View Post
    It doesn't diminish any of my accomplishments. It doesn't make me less qualified. This idea that we have to yield to the pressures put upon us by the "feminist" sort of flies in the face of true feminism.
    This. Changing my last name meant nothing more to me than family cohesiveness, since I knew we would be having children. And as a pp noted, I have no familial tradition with my maiden name, it was often mispronounced, and I was happy to change it!
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  7. #322
    czb
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    ^^^ i know a lot of women do it for that reason (family cohesiveness), but i don't think me not changing my name makes us less of a family. once, one of my kids asked me why my last name was different than theirs, and i gave a simple reason. it wasn't an issue with me so it wasn't an issue with them.
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  8. #323
    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    If its about cohesiveness men can take the woman's name. It would convey the same sense of 'family'. But they generally don't. hmmmm...i wonder why?



    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


    If I wanted the government in my womb I'd fuck a Senator

  9. #324
    czb
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    ^^^ in some cultures it's normal, but definitely not our culture. personally, can't see mr czb taking my last name. ever.

  10. #325
    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    The patriarchal name thing always interested me, in light of the fact that before the advent of blood or DNA testing you could only be 100% sure of the matriarchal bloodlines



    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


    If I wanted the government in my womb I'd fuck a Senator

  11. #326
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    Quote Originally Posted by CornFlakegrl View Post
    I wonder if Angelina is quickly strategizing to up her game. Aman is what Angelina aspires to be, no? Smart, pedigreed, involved at high political levels in international affairs and now, all the access fame can afford.


    The difference is that Amal is educated and Angelina is not. That kind of credibility is necessary for the work that Amal does.

  12. #327
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cartermrc View Post
    I was happy to change my last name too. It was ugly and too many people didn't pronounce it correctly. My oldest friend kept hers because it was unique and interesting.


    My maiden name was very common and women generally did change their last names when I got married, but I still gave it a lot of thought before changing mine. I think it's a personal choice (which is part of what the women's movement was all about), one that each woman should make for herself. Most of the young women I know are still changing their last names after marriage and I live in a major East Coast city. Some young women barely know their fathers, so what's the point of keeping his last name vs. taking her husband's last name?

  13. #328
    Elite Member missbazilb's Avatar
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    In Quebec a woman can't change her last name when she marries unless she can prove her last name is so bad that people ridicule her or it is an infamous last name.

  14. #329
    Elite Member faithanne's Avatar
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    It's not just the changing of the last name, it's going from being "Ms Mary Brown" to "Mrs John Smith" as if the woman's identity is entirely folded into the man's once they're married.

    Disclaimer: I'm not married so this isn't an issue for me, and whatever women want to do is up to them. This is just my opinion and as I've stated here previously it's been traditional in my grandmother's family for generations that the husband takes the wife's surname (old German aristocracy) but they stopped doing that in the Victorian era, although some of my great-aunties kept their name and gave it to their children while the husband/father kept his own.
    "You're going to die tomorrow, Lord Bolton. Sleep well."



  15. #330
    Elite Member Chalet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by missbazilb View Post
    In Quebec a woman can't change her last name when she marries unless she can prove her last name is so bad that people ridicule her or it is an infamous last name.
    Would Mme. Poutine be changeable? (still haven't found any to try).

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