Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin Separate

[chartreuse]

i just consciously uncoupled from my bra. best feeling all day.

[Mrs P]

I need to play the lottery because the night before their announcement I said I wish they'd break up finally. Woo!

[cheray]

I think her brain has uncoupled from her head.....unconsciously or not Im not sure................but its definitely GONE!

[stella blue]

the most offensive thing about that article is that they compare gwyneth to bette and joan. *vomit*

I don't know, I could see Goop pulling a "noooo wire hangers eveeeeeerrrrr" with her little snowflakes.

[rollo]

Gwyneth Paltrow's statement about her and Chris' "conscious uncoupling" is ridiculous, says Polly Hudson

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  • Mar 25, 2014 23:47
  
  
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  • OPINION
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  • BY POLLYHUDSON

The couple announced their split in a statement on Gwyneth's Goop website on Tuesday



Goop.com
The couple released this picture with their statementObviously any marriage split - especially when there are children involved - is sad, and deserving of empathy… but for goodness sake – even Gwyneth and Chris’s break-up statement is annoying and pretentious.
Oh, sorry, forgive me – they’re not breaking up are they? They’re “Consciously Uncoupling.” Obviously.
Breaking the news on her lifestyle website Goop (because why should any other website benefit from the extra traffic, eh?) the announcement is written in the irritating psychobabble both the site and the actress are renowned for – and not in a good way.
The famously fiercely private couple have suddenly decided to give us far too much information… normally split statements are vague, short, and full of clichés about mutual decisions and remaining friends.
Getty
They seemed happy together earlier this year Chris’n’Gwyn, however, want us to know that they’ve been working on their relationship for over a year, some of it together and some apart, and have now decided to remain separate. (Like most people would if given a choice about spending time with Chris Martin or Gwyneth Paltrow.)
After insisting that in many ways – although not literally or physically – they’re closer than they’ve ever been, they appeal for privacy... even though it seems a bit late, what with them having just aired their dirty laundry on the internet.
This unlikely couple – him some bloke from Devon, her a Hollywood Princess – may have shocked the world when they got together, but their break up – sorry, “conscious uncoupling” - isn’t likely to do the same.
Throughout their relationship they’ve made a pedantic point about never being photographed together – even though we all knew they were married – covering their faces with coats and bags when unexpectedly cornered by snappers in private locations like outside celebrity restaurant The Ivy.
Getty
They were last pictured at the Hollywood Stands Up To Cancer Event in January Recently, however, as rumours about their marriage swirled stateside, the reluctant posers happily allowed their picture to be taken together repeatedly.
At a charity event, Gwyneth snuggled cosily on Chris’ lap, looking more content and loved up than ever - they were protesting too much right in front of our noses.
But at the end of the day, it’s the children we should all feel sorry for. Being called Apple and Moses must be awful.


Chris Martin and Gwyneth Paltrow split: Statement is ridiculous - Polly Hudson - 3am & Mirror Online
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[CornFlakegrl]

I can't believe how many people are enraged by Goop's pretentiousness. She's not killing kittens.

[Bombshell]

I can't believe how many people are enraged by Goop's pretentiousness. She's not killing kittens.

I understand what you're saying. I don't like her and I do enjoy poking fun at her, but her pompousness makes me roll my eyes, and that's about it.

[stella blue]

I can't believe how many people are enraged by Goop's pretentiousness. She's not killing kittens.

That's because we have been bagging on her snootery for years. The general public still thought she was Miss Mary Sunshine and this is new and shocking to them.

[BBDSP]

I can't believe how many people are enraged by Goop's pretentiousness. She's not killing kittens.

I hear you. If she didn't pipe up with these obnoxious remarks from time to time, I would pretty much forget about her. She seems to have peaked as an actress awhile ago, and these days she's mostly known for her string of famous boyfriends, and now famous ex-husband. She just has a drippy, goopy personality. She could be the barista at an uber-trendy coffee place who thinks she's better than you because she works there, or the person four cubicles down from you that nobody likes. She's just a rather humorless drip with an overinflated opinion of herself.

She's fun to rag on but she's a pretty easy target. Anyway, divorce is never easy but she'll have a soft landing, and hopefully she and CM are pretty good parents.

[sluce]

i just consciously uncoupled from my bra. best feeling all day.

I consider that the end of a 3-way.

[Fly_On_TheWall]

I understand what you're saying. I don't like her and I do enjoy poking fun at her, but her pompousness makes me roll my eyes, and that's about it.

She honestly thinks she's better than most people. That's what pisses me off about her. I've known people like her. I don't like people like her.

[Beantownfan]

No, (to me) it seems like she said we have it easier... which, IS insulting. To ME. I am a single working mom. I get up at 4:00 AM, I wake up my kid as I leave the house. I drive 40 some miles to work and get here by 5:00AM. I work 8 hours (sometimes 10 so I can have a long weekend with my kid). Now, for me - that means I get to leave work by around 1:00 (or 3:30 on the 10 hour schedule) - which IS awesome because that means that I can beat traffic on my way home... Plus, I can get home and cook an actual meal, clean my own goshdamned house, do some laundry, etc... before I have to go pick up my kid from whatever after school activity he has - at whatever time he is done. I don't have a babysitter. I don't have friends that I use to pick up/drop off/hang out with my kid. My mom and most relatives live in a different state and surprsingly, I don't have a nanny. And most days, I consider myself pretty damn lucky and awfully blessed because, God knows there are MILLIONS of people who have it much worse than me. I like my life, for the most part... I like knowing that I can feed my kid because I know firsthand what hunger does feel like, I know about poverty (maybe not 3rd world kind) and not having electricity or running water. As a PERSON who DID grow up like that, I find Gwynnie's fucking statements OFFENSIVE!

how much do you think someone would charge us? I mean, someone out there has got to want to do it for nothing, right?

Afreaking-men. Her comments are insulting as hell.

[sputnik]

I understand what you're saying. I don't like her and I do enjoy poking fun at her, but her pompousness makes me roll my eyes, and that's about it.

exactly. of course goopy's ridiculously out of touch. and it's kind of hilarious. but the extent to which she enrages and offends people is kind of amazing.

[rollo]

Chris Martin Described As The Only Thing That Made Gwyneth Paltrow ‘Bearable’ By Friends

Enough with the Gwyneth bashing!



By Chris Smith | omg – Fri, Mar 28, 2014 08:53 GMT

Some friends this lot turned out to be.
Friends have claimed Chris Martin made Gwyneth Paltrow bearable. Copyright [NBC]
Pals of Gwyneth Paltrow have claimed that Chris Martin was the only thing that made her bearable, squarely blaming their split on her supposed increasingly eccentric behaviour.

According to The Sun, friends close to the couple – who announced they were ‘consciously uncoupling’ earlier this week – claim that Gwyneth, 41, was responsible for the breakdown in her marriage to Chris, 37.

A neighbour of the couple in Brentwood, Los Angeles, told the paper: “Everyone around here loves Chris.

“He was the one who would take the kids to school or walk the dogs and stop to chat.

“But she is less approachable. We have to talk to her through a middle-man, one of her staff called Nigel. The only time she has ever smiled at me was when she was selling her Goop-recipe lemonade on the street corner.
Gwyneth Paltrow is reportedly less approachable than Chris Martin. Copyright [Splash]
“It will be awful if he is not around any more. He is the only thing that made her bearable.”

Well that's a bit harsh.

Meanwhile, friends of the couple in the UK seem to share the same sentiments, branding Gwyneth’s alleged rants about food, religion and politics as ‘embarassing’.

[Gwyneth and Chris' marriage was in trouble since 2009?]
[Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin announce their 'concious upcoupling']

Another pal recalled: “It’s all hugely embarrassing. She talks about what people should eat when his friends come over and goes on about the Kabbalah faith and politics.
Gwyneth Paltrow has been branded as 'embarrassing'. Copyright [AP]

“A lot of his friends call her Marie Antoinette. A lot of them have just stopped calling.

“Chris finds a lot of what she says and does very crass, like going to the pub dressed up in some ridiculous designer dress.

“He misses her rolling up in jeans and ordering a glass of wine. That’s the girl he fell in love with.”

https://uk.celebrity.yahoo.com/gossip/omg/chris-martin-described-as-the-only-thing-that-made-gwyneth-paltrow--bearable--by-friends-085320319.html

[Gilmourgirl]

Oh please, she has always been a spoiled insufferable asshole. She didn't suddenly change during their marriage. He needs to stand by his bland beige taste.