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Thread: Gwyneth Paltrow and Chris Martin Separate

  1. #166
    Elite Member BITTER's Avatar
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    Let's pool our money and hire someone to club her knees. (just kidding, now)
    ConstanceSpry and Belt Up like this.
    "I am a social vegan; I avoid meet!” Anonymous Introvert

  2. #167
    Elite Member Mel1973's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by witchcurlgirl View Post
    Gwynnie didn't say she envied average moms either. ~shrugs~ I guess people read into it what they want it to say.
    No, (to me) it seems like she said we have it easier... which, IS insulting. To ME. I am a single working mom. I get up at 4:00 AM, I wake up my kid as I leave the house. I drive 40 some miles to work and get here by 5:00AM. I work 8 hours (sometimes 10 so I can have a long weekend with my kid). Now, for me - that means I get to leave work by around 1:00 (or 3:30 on the 10 hour schedule) - which IS awesome because that means that I can beat traffic on my way home... Plus, I can get home and cook an actual meal, clean my own goshdamned house, do some laundry, etc... before I have to go pick up my kid from whatever after school activity he has - at whatever time he is done. I don't have a babysitter. I don't have friends that I use to pick up/drop off/hang out with my kid. My mom and most relatives live in a different state and surprsingly, I don't have a nanny. And most days, I consider myself pretty damn lucky and awfully blessed because, God knows there are MILLIONS of people who have it much worse than me. I like my life, for the most part... I like knowing that I can feed my kid because I know firsthand what hunger does feel like, I know about poverty (maybe not 3rd world kind) and not having electricity or running water. As a PERSON who DID grow up like that, I find Gwynnie's fucking statements OFFENSIVE!
    Quote Originally Posted by BITTER View Post
    Let's pool our money and hire someone to club her knees. (just kidding, now)
    how much do you think someone would charge us? I mean, someone out there has got to want to do it for nothing, right?
    Kill him.
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  3. #168
    Elite Member Beeyotch's Avatar
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    I think Tanya Harding probably could still use the work.

  4. #169
    Elite Member MsDark's Avatar
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    Tonya's not doing that for free. But you could probably give her a few cases of beer and a carton of smokes and it'd be on!
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  5. #170
    Elite Member stella blue's Avatar
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    Gwynnie needs to consciously uncouple her head from her ass.

  6. #171
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  7. #172
    Elite Member ConstanceSpry's Avatar
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    'I had to get rid of the kid. The cat was allergic.'

  8. #173
    fgg
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    Chris Martin & Alexa Chung

    Before we begin…

    Can I just get mad at you for a minute?

    Why would I ever, EVER call Kate Bosworth a Fashion It Girl? How could you ever think that? Do we not know each other at all?

    OK, I’m over it.

    Let’s talk about Chris Martin and Alexa Chung, a British Fashion It Girl, AHEM.

    The Daily Mail and several other outlets are subtly suggesting that she may have been the catalyst for the “conscious uncoupling”. Really? Welcome to my party!

    Well, the Paltrow-Martins did decide to relocate to LA from London, where Chung is based.

    And starting from their family holiday in Hawaii – click here for a refresher – to celebrate the New Year, their final attempt lasted 3 months. But he never could resist a pair of green eyes, could he? Green eyes, they linger. Will Coldplay start performing that song again?

    Payoff at 0:13.

    [video of alexa interviewing gwyneth at the link]

    Gwyneth Paltrow, Chris Martin, Alexa Chung rumours after conscious uncoupling|Lainey Gossip Entertainment Update
    can't post pics because my computer's broken and i'm stupid

  9. #174
    Elite Member AgentOrange's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CornFlakegrl View Post
    i am ethereally unified. I'm pretty sure that means I'm better than all of you all. /ends goop imitation

    And I'll defend her comments. She has her head up her ass and that's what makes her awesome. But seriously, I think she's saying filming a movie is a major disruption to the kids routine versus a regular job where mom working is the routine. I used to travel for work ... I was never gone weeks at a time. Still, for what she makes, I'm not shedding any tears. I get why she doesn't want to do more films a year though.
    Ethereally unified went right to your head didn't it? I got "uniquely open hearted", which makes it sound like I need my hand held when I cross the street.
    Beeyotch likes this.

  10. #175
    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    Chris Martin & Alexa Chung.....wow, and here i thought he couldn't possibly be in a more boring couple than he already was.
    chartreuse and Mrs P like this.



    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


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  11. #176
    Elite Member rollo's Avatar
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    Alexa is Arctic Monkeys-type cool and Goopy never will be. Who knows if she is boring or not? She has a certain look for her pics but I bet she's miles less tedious than Gwynnie.

  12. #177
    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    Lol, arctic monkey cool. Thanks for that laugh!



    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


    If I wanted the government in my womb I'd fuck a Senator

  13. #178
    Gold Member Patty Rox's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by rollo View Post
    Alexa is Arctic Monkeys-type cool and Goopy never will be. Who knows if she is boring or not? She has a certain look for her pics but I bet she's miles less tedious than Gwynnie.
    She is 10 years younger and thinner so in the goop's mind, what else is there?

  14. #179
    Elite Member *Kat*'s Avatar
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    Gwyneth Paltrow’s utterly obnoxious “conscious uncoupling” letter proves she’s the last great star

    The movie star uses the opportunity of her divorce to enlighten us all. She should never change


    Gwyneth Paltrow (Credit: Reuters/Danny Moloshok)
    Gwyneth Paltrow’s announcement on her website Goop that she and husband Chris Martin are divorcing may be one of the all-time Gwynethiest things of all time. While it’s reasonable and humane to feel badly for Paltrow, Martin and their two young children, it’s also of a piece with the entertainment Paltrow has provided for the better part of the past decade in its pretension and manic flightiness. In an era of stars taking a backseat, on-screen, to the CGI robots and aliens they’re fighting, Paltrow has proven yet again that she’s one of our great stars, a worthy heiress to the legacy of Joan Crawford and Bette Davis.

    Paltrow consistently comes in for criticism for the lifestyle she promotes in Goop — recommending elite fishmongers and three-figure tank-tops as a means of making life simpler. She consistently fulfills the ideal of what a Hollywood star might act like if she opened up to the public, providing a gratuitously satisfying look inside the delusions of Hollywood. That she thinks she has the common touch despite being born into Hollywood royalty and having the time and means to spend all day focusing on her appearance and personal comfort is by far the funniest thing about Paltrow.

    And her tips about divorce are as cluelessly airheaded in exactly the same way. The headline of her announcement, “Conscious Uncoupling,” is as woo-woo Eastern-ish philosophical as are much of Paltrow’s post-Oprah-and-Chopra pronouncements, but the text is reasonably normal, describing the couple’s desire for privacy and their year-long separation. (Finally, an explanation to why Paltrow, who’s made it a marriage-long fetish to avoid walking red carpets with Martin, looked so peeved at the Golden Globes!) Good for Paltrow and Martin, if this is what they want. (My colleague Mary Elizabeth Williams feels empathy for Paltrow that I do not, personally, share, but I respect their right to do whatever they want in their marriage — the divorce itself isn’t worth mocking.)


    But then Paltrow shares the thoughts of Dr. Habib Sadeghi & Dr. Sherry Sami, apparently experts on what it means to divorce. Sadeghi is “the director of Be Hive of Healing, an integrative health center based in Los Angeles.” Sami is “founder of Happy Kids Dental Planet Homeopathic Dentistry and Orthodontics in Los Angeles.” Credentials (or lack thereof?) when it comes to marriage counseling aside, Sadeghi and Sami’s thoughts are treated as gospel here: The pair draw in evolutionary biology and the structure of the human skeleton (“Life is a spiritual exercise in evolving from an exoskeleton for support and survival to an endoskeleton”) in order to explain why a divorce might happen.

    This is so classic it hurts. Paltrow can’t just announce a divorce via press release or in a Vanity Fair story — after all, she’s feuding with the publication ever since it launched and subsequently killed an investigation into why she was so annoying, or something yet more personal. In order to explain to her public why she and her husband might be divorcing, Paltrow had to trot out a phrase invoking mindfulness (she even does divorce better than the plebes do!) and then explain to her public, via the teachings of an integrative health professional and a homeopathic orthodontist, why adults might get divorced. Gwyneth … we already know why.

    But she should never, never change. Paltrow has managed to make even the splashiest Hollywood divorces look both bitter and basic. There appears to be little acrimony between her and Martin (they’re reportedly on vacation now) — bravo! And bravo, too, for a star so devoted to her persona as the font of human wisdom that she can turn her divorce into an opportunity to enlighten us all.
    One would think this is the best Goop will ever get, that it’s all downhill from here. That may be true, but consider. Paltrow’s about to start dating again, and enlightening us on what the modern dating scene is for single folks, both those with access to the finest things on earth and those who can’t afford much more than beer and pizza. I’m already refreshing goop.com once an hour.


    Daniel D'Addario is a staff reporter for Salon's entertainment section. Follow him on Twitter @DPD_

    Gwyneth Paltrow’s utterly obnoxious “conscious uncoupling” letter proves she’s the last great star - Salon.com

  15. #180
    czb
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    the most offensive thing about that article is that they compare gwyneth to bette and joan. *vomit*

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