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Thread: Chris Rock Divorcing Wife Of 19 Years

  1. #61
    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    That is interesting but while divorce has increased for these groups, they are still statistically lower than younger groups. The 65+ group gets blamed on viagara and the 50+ group gets blamed on women returning to careers - imagine that. I still am fascinated by the studies that show couples who live together before marriage are more likely to divorce. I am all for divorce when it is in the best interest of those involved - remember I am divorced. But I will say that since no-fault was permitted, and the time needed to grant a divorce was shortened, more people jump in faster. The older laws were barbaric but perhaps we moved too far in the other direction to correct the past.
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    Elite Member dksnj's Avatar
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    I met my husband right after I turned 18. Was Married at 20. Two kids by the time I was 22. This was back in 1989. We divorced in February 2013. We literally just grew apart, had different interests, friends, etc. I should have gotten out a lot earlier & there was no reason not to. I was financially independent. One day, I woke up feeling like I just didn't want to do it anymore (there were contributing factors through the years). Best decision I ever made. We are friends to this day & occasionally hang out, but I would never go back. Love him, but not in love with him....huge difference and once I realized that, I knew I was making the right decision.
    Vera Donovan: (Dolores Claiborne) : Sometimes you have to be a high-riding bitch to survive. Sometimes being a bitch is all a woman has to hold onto.

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    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    I'm glad you were able to, and I'm glad that we don't live in a time where getting a divorce is very difficult or socially stigmatized. (No snark ) Back when it was, women's lives were really impacted by the fact that they had to remain in marriages. It's another part of what feminism gave us that many people forget about because they didn't experience what things were like before.
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    Quote Originally Posted by witchcurlgirl View Post
    The highest rising rate of divorce is among older couples, I was reading about this fairly recently. It seems that in some cases people spend many years in a marriage, then the kids are out on their own and the couple realizes they have nothing in common, or have grown apart over these years. People do change, and their interests change, etc. They decide they don't want to spend their remaining years in a marriage that doesn't work for them and they divorce. No cheating or anything, just 'hey, i have one life and i want it to be happy'. I don't think many people decide to divorce lightly either, and I don't judge those who do by thinking 'Oh if only they had rode it out'. If marriage makes you happy,then stay married. If it doesn't, then divorce. It's an agreement, not a prison sentence.
    This is the exact rationale my parents have used in explaining why they've lasted 40 years. They have always said their marriage came before anything else, including us kids. It sounds selfish of them but as I matured I fully understand what they meant. One day all us kids would be gone and they find themselves living with a virtual stranger.

    Relationships of any kind require nurturing and care. I expect the divorce rates will probably steadily increase in the coming years as the helicopter parents are going to find themselves without a "purpose" when the snowflakes fly the nest.

  5. #65
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    i don't think it's selfish at all. makes complete sense.
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    Elite Member MohandasKGanja's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Charmed Hour View Post
    This is the exact rationale my parents have used in explaining why they've lasted 40 years. They have always said their marriage came before anything else, including us kids. It sounds selfish of them but as I matured I fully understand what they meant. One day all us kids would be gone and they find themselves living with a virtual stranger.

    Relationships of any kind require nurturing and care. I expect the divorce rates will probably steadily increase in the coming years as the helicopter parents are going to find themselves without a "purpose" when the snowflakes fly the nest.
    I think some couples really do get lost in parenthood and begin to forget why they got together in the first place. We don't get a chance to get away by ourselves often, but when we do, it's magic. We also don't act like sexless robots around our kids. If I had a dime for every time our daughter cried out, "Ughh! No PDA!" I would be retired already.
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    Elite Member Chalet's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nana51 View Post
    Wow! Kind of sad thinking. I never said divorce was an option people should never consider. There are many many cases where it is a good idea. When I "rode it out" that doesn't mean at the end I am just tolerating it, i mean the feelings came back and I loved him all over again and glad I didn't give up. Just sounds so defeatist to give up after 19 years because "he was tired of being married". I thought being "judgy" is what we do on these boards.
    I shouldn't have used your quote, it's not how I wanted to explain it. I admire when people work on romantic relationships and friendships as well, but break ups and divorce don't bother me and I don't think my way is a sad way of thinking. A spouses death is very sad to me, not a divorce.

    Quote Originally Posted by Charmed Hour View Post
    This is the exact rationale my parents have used in explaining why they've lasted 40 years. They have always said their marriage came before anything else, including us kids. It sounds selfish of them but as I matured I fully understand what they meant. One day all us kids would be gone and they find themselves living with a virtual stranger.

    Relationships of any kind require nurturing and care. I expect the divorce rates will probably steadily increase in the coming years as the helicopter parents are going to find themselves without a "purpose" when the snowflakes fly the nest.
    I just heard this last weekend. My friend's son has a female roommate who finished college and has been working since September. Her little sister went off to college so the Mom was home alone. Never worked, now she waits for the husband to come home. She just asked the working daughter to move back home and commute to work - and she's moving back in one month. She's on the lease and has to find her replacement or pay that rent to him.

  8. #68
    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    ^^^^
    seriously, that woman should be ashamed of herself. she's essentially asking her daughter to give up her independence because mom doesn't know what to do with herself all day. that poor girl.
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    ^^ Yeah. mama needs to volunteer

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    Quote Originally Posted by Chalet View Post



    I just heard this last weekend. My friend's son has a female roommate who finished college and has been working since September. Her little sister went off to college so the Mom was home alone. Never worked, now she waits for the husband to come home. She just asked the working daughter to move back home and commute to work - and she's moving back in one month. She's on the lease and has to find her replacement or pay that rent to him.
    I know of a few people who are planning to move when their children go to college... to the town their child's college is. That's just fucking crazy! One couple is moving clear across the country. Selling their current home and buying one out there. People need to seek help.
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    I really admire people with good/great marriages, and respect it when people don't leave at the first sign of trouble and work at their marriages. I know at least a few couples who had trouble that could have resulted in a divorce but sought counseling and emerged stronger than ever.

    I shouldn't have used your quote, it's not how I wanted to explain it. I admire when people work on romantic relationships and friendships as well, but break ups and divorce don't bother me and I don't think my way is a sad way of thinking. A spouses death is very sad to me, not a divorce.
    My parents had been married for >33 years when my mom passed away in her 55s. There was very little divorce in my family and I always thought that divorce was sad and meant that the couple hadn't tried hard enough. I have changed my mind after being married to a selfish, irresponsible asshole for >20 years. Staying with someone you don't love or who doesn't hold up their end of things is sad, and exposing your kids to that is sad. In comparison, divorce would be
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  12. #72
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    Are you still with him BBDSP?
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