The Britney Spears meltdown thread - for her small, everyday missteps

[ingi]

Jamie Lynn's Present at the Pump




The last place we'd expect to receive a bouquet of roses from a stranger is at a gas station in Louisiana, but then again, we're not Jamie Lynn Spears. We guess, in this instance, stars aren't just like us at all!

Source

Why does her hair look like Pe Pe Le Pew?

[southernbelle]

Originally Posted by ingi

Saturday, March 15th 2008
Casa de Douche




KFed and Daddy Jamie Spears will reportedly join forces to manage a Mexican restaurant in Los Angeles. This is a brilliant idea since neither of them are Mexican and L.A. definitely needs more Mexican restaurants. Money maker! Brit Brit will apparently fund the joint. When I say "Brit Brit will fund the joint" I mean Daddy Spears will use her money since he's the HBIC of her finances.
A source said, “K-Fed wants to take over a Mexican place in LA with him and Jamie as managers. The restaurant, called Casa Cordobes, has been a favorite of Kevin’s for a while. He ate there with Britney. Now the owner wants to retire he really wants to run it. Kevin and Jamie get along well nowadays and Jamie is keen to get back into the restaurant game.”
This sounds like a fucking 80s sitcom. They should let Brit Brit takeover the menu. Think of all the delicious things she could come up with! I'm thinking Frapp flan, Huevos Rancheetos, carne asucka and orange soda horchata.
Source

Today's special!!!
El Britney: Bowl of Cheez-Whiz served with a bottomless basket of Cheetos (available in Regular, Flamin' Hot, or White Cheddar!) $6.50

[t13nif]

Originally Posted by ingi

Jamie Lynn's Present at the Pump

She looks like a 40 year old hillbilly hag.

[NicoleWasHere]

Jamie Spears is fucking scary looking... He looks like one of those child molesters. He definetly has the eyes.

[H. Lecter]

I would not hit on her ..even with a 40 feet pole.... Yuck...

She looks awful

[Mariesoleil]

Originally Posted by t13nif

She looks like a 40 year old hillbilly hag.

I agree, she doesn't even look like herself.

[ingi]

Monday, March 17th 2008
Sam's A Pussy!




Sam Lutfi is not ready to battle Daddy Spears. Sam was supposed to be in court today fighting the restraining order against him, but he's decided to skip the hearing and stay away from Brit Brit for another month. Wuss ass! Sam's original restraining order expired today, but he's struck a deal to extend the order for 30 days and avoid battling Daddy Spears in court. The Commish is expected to sign the extension today.
The restraining order was put in place, because Lynne Spears accused Sam of drugging and controlling her daughter. In order for Sam to get the restraining order dropped he would have to prove that all the evidence against him is wrong.
Daddy Spears is triumphant again and he didn't even have to do anything! Have yourself an extra green beer today Daddy Spears! I'm disappointed, because my St. Patricks Day gift was going to be hearing about Sam shaking in his Bugle Boys.
Sam apparently felt that extending the order was the best thing for him and Brit. Now if Sam will only take his landing strip twin, Adnan Ghalib, with him! Sam Lutfi Agrees to Steer Clear of Britney for One More Month - Britney Spears : People.com

[ingi]

Sunday, March 16th 2008
The Passion Of The Cheeto



Mel Gibson and Britney Spears had dinner together last night. WTF is right! This is not an acid hallucination. And the dinner did not take place at Bellevue Aslyum. Hollywood.tv caught Britney looking like a million pesos entering the Russian restaurant Romanov last night. A few minutes later Mel Gibson entered. Britney came back out a couple of hours later followed by Mel.
OK! claims the two might have been hooked up by one of Brit's lawyers, Blair Berk. Blair represented Mel when he went on that drunken jew-hating rampage. Sources think that Mel wanted to give Britney a little advice. Crazy leading the crazy! A source said, "He understands what she's going through. And he certainly has advice on how to not let it destroy your life." I think I just choked on my borscht. The source also thinks that Mel might be trying to get Brit to attend his super-conservative church in Malibu.
I wonder Mel Gibson called her sugar tits? I hope not, because Brit would bite off her tit if she thought it was made out of sugar. The Passion Of The Cheeto | Dlisted

[ingi]

Source: Mel and Britney Have Been 'Meeting Regularly'



Mel Gibson and Britney Spears' dinner over the weekend wasn't their first meeting.

The pair and their families have met a number of times since Spears checked out from her second hospitalization last month, a source tells PEOPLE.

"Mel and his wife Robin clearly saw a woman in crisis and wanted to extend themselves in any way possible," the source says.

"There's just a handful of people in the world who understand the kind of intense attention that Britney goes through, and how to raise a family with some semblance of privacy and how to keep one's family intact and out of the limelight," the source adds.

"There are no expectations, there is no agenda. It's simply an act of human kindness – one neighbor reaching out to the other."

Gibson and Spears used to be neighbors when the singer previously lived in Malibu.

Source

[Just Kill Me]

Didn't he like "reach out" to Courtney Love, too?

[Chimera]

Good for Mel. What she really needs are decent friends.

[aabbcc]

Originally Posted by TaffyMoon

Good for Mel. What she really needs are decent friends.

Isn't Mel like a raging drunk and a nasty racist? Doesn't sound too decent to me.

[marie]

Originally Posted by aabbcc

Isn't Mel like a raging drunk and a nasty racist? Doesn't sound too decent to me.

100% agree with you

[mrs.v]

So much fucking hype! CBS has released this short ass clip of Brit Brit's upcoming appearance on that "How I Met Your Memaw" show. It's like they won the lottery. In the clip Brit asks Doogie Howser, "Can we have sex and then go shopping?" Sweetie, he's strictly dickly. He'll totally take you shopping though and then maybe he can degrease your weave.
And nothing sends my cheeks running towards my eyelids like hearing Brit's little baby voice. I secretly love it like I secretly love getting up in the middle of the night to piss.



Britney Spears on How I Met - Brightcove

Dlisted | Be Very Afraid

[Bijoux]

I gotta say...

I can't wait until Monday to watch this show.