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Thread: Avril Lavigne Engaged to Nickelback's Chad Kroeger

  1. #16
    Elite Member nancydrew's Avatar
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    They will make the ugliest kids on the planet together
    Waterslide likes this.
    (276): Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
    OK, I can't sing, I can't act, I'm dumb, I'm a hillbilly, but I can twerk, so whatever.-Miley Cyrus

  2. #17
    Elite Member OrangeSlice's Avatar
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    Oh fuck no! They've got two years, tops.
    "Schadenfreude, hard to spell, easy to feel." ~VenusinFauxFurs

    "Scoffing is one of my main hobbies!" ~Trixie

  3. #18
    Elite Member chartreuse's Avatar
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    white, black, puerto rican/everybody just a freakin'/good times were rollin'.


  4. #19
    Elite Member yanna's Avatar
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    OMG, they will birth the musical Antichrist!

  5. #20
    Elite Member Kittylady's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by nancydrew View Post
    They will make the ugliest kids on the planet together
    I can't... I just... Oh jeez, I don't even want to think about this!
    I hate to advocate drugs, alcohol, violence or insanity to anyone, but they've always worked for me. Hunter S Thompson

    How big would a T-Rex wang be?! - Karistiona


  6. #21
    Elite Member whitetigeress's Avatar
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    Something tells me she will become the Elizabeth Taylor of rock (or pop, whatever).

  7. #22
    Elite Member nancydrew's Avatar
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    What? Is Elizabeth Taylor a talentless hack? Because thats what bitch is and all she ever well be.
    (276): Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
    OK, I can't sing, I can't act, I'm dumb, I'm a hillbilly, but I can twerk, so whatever.-Miley Cyrus

  8. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tati View Post
    Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew.
    ^^ That was going to be my quote exactly. I cannot think of two more repugnant, talentless "musicians." Blech!

  9. #24
    Gold Member VeraGemini's Avatar
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    This is the gossip equivalent of body parts in the mail.

  10. #25
    Elite Member Brando's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tati View Post
    Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew.
    This times a billion
    When you came in the air went out. And every shadow filled up with doubt. I don't know who you think you are, But before the night is through,I wanna do bad things with you.

  11. #26
    Gold Member Polyester Pam's Avatar
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    The douchebaggery is off the scale.

  12. #27
    Elite Member Waterslide's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tati View Post
    Ewwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww. Ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew ew.
    ^That was exactly what I said when I saw this on my phone's news alerts.

    And then I said the something like the following:

    Quote Originally Posted by nancydrew View Post
    They will make the ugliest kids on the planet together
    Quote Originally Posted by yanna View Post
    OMG, they will birth the musical Antichrist!
    ^They will make ugly kids who make the ugliest music on the planet! I mean, if your parents are Avril Lavigne and the dick from Nickelback, you're never going to be the next Bruce Springsteen, the next Kurt Cobain, hell, you won't even be the next Justin Bieber. Hope their kids decide to go into accounting or something.

    Michael K because he says it better.

    Tuesday, August 21st 2012
    Avril Lavigne Is Engaged To The Singer From Nickelback (This Is Your Cue To Laugh Until You Cry)




    The only way to follow-up a post about the existence of God is with a post about the existence of Lucifer. The devil is alive and has a really messed up way of screwing with our souls, because he has joined Avril Lavigne and Chad Kroeger together in an unholy union of suck. No, August 21st is not Canadian April Fool's Day. I already checked and checked again.
    Sometime before February, Avril Lavigne stopped boning Bruce Jenner's son (Happy birthday, Brody!) and made the Canadian embassy in Hell cackle with laughter by getting on Chad Kroeger. Their rep tells People that the two Canadian ear killers got close while working on a song together six months ago and now they're engaged to be married. Chad gave Avril a 14-carat diamond ring on August 8th. This will be 37-year-old Chad's first marriage and 27-year-old Avril's second.
    I was going to say that this is about as random as a ferret hugging a dildo, but this actually makes a whole lot of sense. Avril is the Ed Hardy trucker cap of music and Nickelback is the Affliction cum rag of music. And anybody who owns an Ed Hardy trucker cap definitely owns an Affliction cum rag, because the two go together perfectly. But for why are they engaged after only 6 months? Please don't tell me she's knocked up, because I'm really not ready for the Antichrist to rip apart the earth's crust by making the worst music civilization has ever heard.
    It's truly the end of days, because you know Ke$hit will be the maid of honor, Justin Bieber will officiate, Scott Stapp will be best man and Avril and Chad will register at Hot Topic. Oh here go hell come.
    And the scariest words in the English language are officially: Avril Kroeger. I'm pretty sure that was the full name of the devil's first born.

    Posted by: Michael K
    "AND WHEN YOU BECAME DENISE, I TOLD ALL YOUR COLLEAGUES, THOSE CLOWN COMICS, TO FIX THEIR HEARTS OR DIE."

  13. #28
    Elite Member Mrs P's Avatar
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    Wtf. I thought she was with Brody Jenner and in some serious relationship, tattoos and all. Nickelback makes me sick. Glad to find out they are Canadian .... no offense to the Canadians ...

  14. #29
    Elite Member BelledeJour's Avatar
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    This has to be a pr-stunt or whatever (and why does the rep talks about that although no one knew that they even do something together?)

    Quote Originally Posted by DeadDwarf View Post
    I think they go together well, they're both are annoying as hell and make shitty music. Makes sense.

    2 years before the divorce.
    I don't even give them a year.

  15. #30
    Elite Member stef's Avatar
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    am i the only person here who likes nickelback?...

    this is such a random couple, i didn't even know they were dating.
    "This is not meant to be at all offensive: You suffer from diarrhea of the mouth but constipation of the brain." - McJag

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