Page 10 of 14 FirstFirst ... 67891011121314 LastLast
Results 136 to 150 of 207
Like Tree564Likes

Thread: Amber Heard (Turd) vs Johnny Depp (Derp)

  1. #136
    czb
    czb is offline
    Elite Member czb's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    left coast
    Posts
    18,020

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by rollo View Post
    Well, if she left a present for him in the bed (not clear if it was her) then maybe both of them were gross. Do some people have a romantic vision of her?
    no, not romantic.

    and except for the reported deuce, she at least looks presentable most of the time.

    this testimony makes them both look bad. and not sure how johnny is gonna be able to defend himself against the 'wife-beater' comment. he wasn't too smart to let this go to trial.
    DawnM74 likes this.

  2. #137
    Elite Member
    Join Date
    Jul 2012
    Posts
    4,144

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by czb View Post
    i dunno. she must've liked him at least a little. how else could she have sex with a greasy, gross, smelly guy? repeatedly. i know some of y'all have some romantic vision of the johnny depp from the kate moss era, but that guy is dead and buried. what we're left with is the anti-dorian gray, but with bad hygiene.
    Anna Nicole Smith

  3. #138
    czb
    czb is offline
    Elite Member czb's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2005
    Location
    left coast
    Posts
    18,020

    Default

    yeah, but with anna nicole, marshall was like a zillion years old, ok, maybe only 90, wheelchair bound and it is unlikely they had sex very frequently due to his infirmity. they probably didn't even spend much time together unless she wanted to, so it would be easier to pull off a marriage. with johnny and amber, he may have been gross and smelly but he was not infirm. apples and oranges.

  4. #139
    Elite Member lindsaywhit's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2011
    Posts
    5,446

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Sarzy View Post
    Amber Heard's sister today passionately backed her sibling on the stand and said Johnny Depp repeatedly attacked her - including on one occasion when she saw the actor grab her by the hair and hit her in the face.
    Whitney Henriquez said she witnessed the so-called 'stairs incident' in March 2015 and described how a drunken Depp nearly pushed her down the stairs at the couple's penthouse apartment in Los Angeles when she intervened in an argument.
    Mr Henriquez claimed he struck her on the arm while at the top of a staircase, causing Heard to say 'don't hit my sister' and hit him back. She said Depp then 'really went for Amber', adding that she was 'standing right there next to them when Johnny grabbed her by the hair with one hand and I saw him punch her really hard in the head'.


    In a wide-ranging testimony, the sister said Depp would insult Heard and say he loved her in the same sentence 'with equal amounts of passion', telling her: 'F***ing ugly c**t, you fat w***e… but God I f***ing love you'.
    Among her other claims heard at the High Court in London today during Depp's sensational libel trial were that:

    • She was 'shocked' at how much weight Heard had lost and that she had been suffering from anxiety attacks;
    • Depp's assistant Nathan Holmes was so desperate to get him on set that he 'even took Johnny's drugs';
    • Depp accused her of leaking and selling stories to the media about the couple to her People journalist friend;
    • She was described as their 'marriage counsellor' while living in one of five penthouses owned by Depp in LA;
    • Depp did not like Heard working and said the actress would not take the credit card he wanted to give her;
    • She 'begged' Heard not to marry Depp, saying him putting a ring on her 'was not going to stop him hitting her'.

    The hotel banquet manager was living with the couple in Los Angeles in March 2013 when Depp began arguing with Heard after the actress claimed he had been cheating on her with a woman called Rochelle Hathaway.
    She claimed that Depp was drinking whisky in the kitchen with an almost empty bottle in one hand, even though his 'sobriety nurse' Debbie Lloyd was also there, and he was swearing about Heard but 'not making much sense'.
    Heard came in and was on the mezzanine level allegedly screaming 'f*** you' at him while Depp was on the ground floor, also screaming verbal abuse, saying she was a 'w***e' and 'an ugly old c**t', according to Ms Henriquez.

    Ms Henriquez said that she then went upstairs to try to calm Heard down, while Depp was still on the ground floor with both of his security guards and threw a Red Bull can at the sisters, which hit Ms Lloyd. He allegedly shouted 'f*** you b****es, you c***s' and then started coming up the stairs towards them while yelling.
    Ms Henriquez said: 'He came up the stairs from the kitchen to the mezzanine level. I was on the top of the stairs at the mezzanine level and I stood with my back to the stairs, facing Amber but between them. I remember being worried that I was near the edge of the top of the stairs.
    'When he got to the top of the stairs, he was pulling me backwards so he could get to Amber. I remember being scared because I was worried that I would fall backwards and fall down the stairs. Johnny reached out to shove me out of the way to lunge at Amber – reaching out to try hit Amber – and instead struck me, hitting me in the arm.
    'Amber suddenly lurched forward and hit him and said, 'don't hit my sister'. I didn't see exactly how Amber hit him but it didn't seem especially hard; it was just enough for him to lose momentum. She was just trying to protect me and I think it probably stopped me from being pushed down the stairs.
    'There was a struggle with me stuck in the middle of it, and he really went for Amber. Somehow I was pushed out of the way so I wasn't between them, but I was standing right there next to them when Johnny grabbed her by the hair with one hand and I saw him punch her really hard in the head with his other hand multiple times.

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...cks-court.html
    Now, this testimony rings true for me.

    For the record, I think they are both ridiculously dramatic, over-the-top, divas, who found the level of toxicity and even violence in their interactions to be as thrilling as they were shameful and revolting.

    BUT... this isn't about which one or neither or both are good or bad or violent or victim. This trial is supposed to be about whether Depp was a wife beater. Hasn't the answer to that become pretty clear? The rest of the trial is pretty much just lurid and salacious entertainment for the masses. The Sun is no doubt basking in the notoriety - it sells papers.
    czb, Sarzy, Trixie and 2 others like this.


  5. #140
    Elite Member MsDark's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Northwest MS/Memphis TN
    Posts
    31,697

    Default

    She could have gotten just as much career mileage out of fucking JD for awhile she didn't have to marry the dude.

    She's no angel, but he's the bigger mess and abuser by far. He's been having toxic relationships and fighting with women since Amber Heard was in diapers.

    And just to reiterate (for all the noobs and latecomers-to-thread): We wouldn't be hearing about this sordid shit AT ALL if he'd left well enough alone!
    My Posts Have Won Awards. Can Any Of You Claim The Same? -ur_next_ex

    "I don't have pet peeves. I have major psychotic fucking hatreds, okay". ~George Carlin

  6. #141
    Elite Member rollo's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2009
    Posts
    48,848

    Default

    ‘I can’t believe Amber beat your a**': High Court sees Heard's sister Whitney Henriquez revealing marks on her arms and neck caused by sibling in un-broadcast footage from 2006 reality TV show


    • Heard's sister Whitney Henriquez will go back on the stand today one day after passionately backing sibling
    • But there was drama in the High Court this morning as Depp's lawyer claimed had been texting her sister
    • Other witnesses are Heard's acting coach Kristina Sexton and friends iO Tillett Wright and Raquel Pennington
    • Heard has accused Pirates of the Caribbean star of verbal and physical abuse throughout their relationship
    • Depp says at High Court libel trial in London he was not violent towards her and it was she who attacked him

    By MARK DUELL and MARTIN ROBINSON, CHIEF REPORTER and VIVEK CHAUDHARY FOR MAILONLINE
    PUBLISHED: 10:00, 24 July 2020 | UPDATED: 13:38, 24 July 2020

    A bombshell video showing Amber Heard's sister showing friends 'bruises on her face and body' after the actress 'whipped her a**' proves that Whitney Henriquez lied under oath, Johnny Depp's legal team told the High Court today.
    Ms Henriquez took the stand this afternoon to explain the previously unseen reality TV clip from 2006 or 2007 less than 24 hours after she gave evidence claiming Amber had never been violent towards her.
    Mr Depp's barrister David Sherborne told the court that a 'confidential source' handed them the clip after Ms Henriquez' spell in the stand yesterday because it describes a fight between the sisters. He said the material 'demonstrates Ms Whitney (Henriquez) was lying yesterday'.

    In the video, she can be seen talking to a group of women around a swimming pool. Whitney admits to an altercation with her sister, adding: ‘I have already talked about it, I won’t talk about it anymore.’ One woman then says to Whitney: ‘I can’t believe Amber beat your a**. I know you can beat her a**.’
    Whitney says repeatedly ‘I don’t want to talk about it,’ when she is asked about the incident. Another woman adds: ‘She really did whip your a**.’ She then inspects Whitney’s arms and neck, where a mark is visible. Whitney shows her arms and elbows with the woman also holding up her chin, as if she is examining an injury.
    Eleanor Laws QC, representing Depp questioned Whitney about the video today, and Ms Henriquez denied that the video proved that Heard physically attacked her but admitted that they did have a verbal argument.

    +5



    Actress Amber Heard arrives at the High Court in London this morning for Johnny Depp's libel case to continue. But proceedings were paused as Mr Depp's legal team claims Amber was texting her sister Whitney (right) while she gave evidence


    +5

    Johnny Depp waves as he arrives to attend his libel trial against News Group Newspapers at London's High Court yesterday

    https://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/art...igh-Court.html

    SHELLEE likes this.
    I have some famous friends and I have mostly not famous friends.

  7. #142
    Silver Member Mrs Fawlty's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Posts
    677

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Sassiness View Post
    This is part of the problem though. <br>

    The core part of intimate partner violence, domestic abuse, domestic violence, family violence - whatever you want to call it.

    Its not the laying hands on, using physical violence.
    So true.
    Its the coercive control.
    Absolutely.

    We don't teach kids to identify coercive control and why it is bad.
    Yes, it should be part of the school curriculum.

    Instead, we teach kids that...

    Its ok for a boy to brag about fucking you, even if that humiliates you, and you have to change everything for him even if he barely changes for you (Grease)
    Argh,yes!

    Stalking you is love (Twilight)
    Yes.

    Obsessive control is a sign of Iove (Wuthering Heights)
    Yes, Heathcliff.
    Chasing and chasing you until you break down and say "ok fine" is a legitimate way to pursue a romance (insert any book, tv show, film under the planet here...)
    I've always avoided 'romance' films/novels etc. and cannot add any titles, sorry!
    Think about the phrase "boys will be boys". In her recent netflix comedy special, Hannah Gadsby points out that in this phrase, we admit that society expects boys to be unable to resist their hormones. But instead of teaching men not to rape and abuse, we teaxh women not to let themselves get raped? Wtf???
    Indeed, Why the eff do they say that????

    IPV is not a hierarchy of "less serious controlling non physical violence abuse and manipulation" progressing in a sequential pattern until the abuser uses physical or sexual violence.
    Quite right.
    Some abusers never hit their partner. They don't need to. They know that they've controlled everything and intimidated them so muxh thst they only need to raise their voice a bit, or say a key word, and their victim will instantly obey out of fear. My father didn't often hit me or my mother. Actually i don't think he ever hit her. He occasionally pushed us, and often threatened to punch us. He did damage property when angry. We knew he was capable of extreme violence. We walked on eggshells because we never knew what would set him off. Every step of every day at home was about guessing what wpuld set him off today and avoiding that.
    This whole paragraph resonates with me.
    My father never raised his voice- his words were more menacing, as a result.


    Rapists are not horny. They want power over their victim, to humiliate them, and especially in the context of IPV rape, they want a very personal, very intimate attack to punish their victim for any perceived transgression
    Very true.
    Oh but he always seemed so nice, gee I guess she just made it up to get the kids in the divorce...
    The mailman, newspaperman and the milkman always said that my father was a lovely man!

    Abusers are always charming. That's how they hide. How they rope you in. And its their active defence to any truthful allegations you might make.
    Totally!

    Society is far to willing to believe the myth of the vengeful, lying woman over the reality of the controlling, abusive man.
    My father was a highly-respected scientist. A white collar worker- nobody would have ever believed my mother over such a man!
    My job is exhausting. Thanks for everyone who gave me an online high five for it.
    And it's another high-five from me!

    Sassy, your post should be given to every young teenager. Every word struck a massive chord with me and everyone else on GR. An awesomely multi-facetted discussion. Sassy, be kind to yourself. Eat well, take rest, take time out to keep your soul nurtured and safe from the terrible things you see and hear. You deserve the best, hugs from me to you and everyone at GR...xx...xx
    On the matter of coercive control, as Novice stated, it has been accepted, in UK law, recently but there needs to be more discussion/debate, especially so that everyone knows what it is at an early-enough stage in life.
    Discuss and show
    -how it shrouds the victims of DV in shame, fear, depression and poor physical health.
    -why and how victims stay in such relationships.
    -why and how emotional, psychological, social and financial difficulties often prevent them from 'escaping' their Hell.
    -how and why, as often is the case, recognising that the abuser is destroying the essence and soul of the victim.
    -how the abuser isolates their victim from anyone and any situation that could help the victim to escape.
    -discuss and develop strategies for dealing with an abusive relationship and what help is availlable for victims.
    -full discussion/debate the importance of good physical health and mental wellbeing in all relationships.
    - recognise that men and women can be victims of abuse.
    Last edited by Mrs Fawlty; July 24th, 2020 at 11:13 AM.
    Novice and mostroop like this.

  8. #143
    Silver Member Mrs Fawlty's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Posts
    677

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by Novice View Post
    To be fair surviving was a lot easier than recovery. To survive I *just* had to remember to keep breathing.
    To recover.... That I struggle with.


    The England & Wales made coercive control an offense in 2015 (as you will know), however, if there is anyone reading this that wants or needs to know more please go to this link - it's a document to assist Police and other similar service understand what might be happening:-

    https://www.gov.uk/government/public...y-relationship

    Also - while I'm supplying resources Paladin is an anti-stalking organisation, founded by Laura Richards after she got the law on stalking changed.
    I linked to a podcast a few pages back that she has along with an exFBI and it give a unique perspective.
    https://paladinservice.co.uk/



    MrsFawlty - you are an amazing woman!!!
    BIBYou are a pretty fabulous woman, yourself.xx
    Novice likes this.

  9. #144
    Elite Member Novice's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Beyond Caring, then hang a left.
    Posts
    47,308

    Default

    So basically Johnny Depp's defence about not being a serial "wife" beater is..... that everyone else is lying?
    Kate Moss threw herself down the stairs & trashed her own hotel room
    Ellen Barkin holds a grudge against him
    Amber Heard is lying about multiple attacked
    Amber Heard's sister is lying
    None of Johnny Depp's employees, who are dependent on him for their income & sometimes homes are *not* lying even when the date on the photo is before the date of the incident you're claiming it's about.....

    Does he not see how badly this is going? Maybe not in court but in public opinion?
    Trixie likes this.

  10. #145
    Elite Member Novice's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Beyond Caring, then hang a left.
    Posts
    47,308

    Default

    'IN A FROTH' Amber Heard pal claims he heard Johnny Depp threaten to ‘peel actress’ hair back’ before calling 911

    AMBER Heard's pal today claimed he heard Johnny Depp threaten to "peel the actress's hair back" in their final alleged bust-up.

    iO Tillett Wright told the High Court he called 911 after he heard "what sounded like a cry or a yelp" over the phone as he spoke to the 34-year-old star.

    Giving evidence over video link, the 34-year-old writer said he had been talking to Heard on the phone when Depp allegedly attacked her and yelling to "get out of the house".

    He told the court the phone then sounded like it dropped to the ground, hearing the actress say something like "you just threw the phone at my house."

    Mr Tillett Wright, who had been in Brooklyn at the time, said the next thing he heard was Depp saying: "Oh, you think I hit you, you think I hit you. What if I peel your hair back?"

    He then alleged that he could heard the actress scream "call 911" - deciding to hang up and call emergency services to the couple's home in LA in May 2016.

    Mr Tillett Wright, who was the final witness to give evidence in the lengthy three week trial, then claimed Depp suffered from "paranoid delusions" and was "in a froth" after finding faeces in the couple's marital bed.

    The High Court was today told:

    Amber Heard told her acting coach that Johnny Depp would ‘never let me go’
    Heard was not in a ‘great mental state’ the week before she married Depp
    The couple would ‘scream and say horrible things’ to each other, acting coach Kristina Sexton told the trial
    Heard’s sister Whitney dismissed a video played to the court that was claimed to show her discussing injuries she had suffered in a fight with her sibling
    The actress’ friend revealed she had seen cuts to her friend’s feet after Depp allegedly attacked her in Australia

    The High Court has previously heard allegations that Depp hit out at Heard during the incident as he heard the pair laughing about excrement that had been found by a cleaner.

    The poo had been discovered the night after the Pirates of the Caribbean star got home from a financial meeting where he was told he had lost $650million, arriving late to his wife's 30th birthday.

    https://www.thesun.co.uk/news/122171...epp-peel-hair/




    Johnny Depp wanted Amber Heard ‘barefoot, pregnant – and at home’, court told

    Heard became ‘nervous wreck’ at auditions, fearing Depp’s reaction, acting coach says

    Johnny Depp wanted Amber Heard “barefoot and pregnant – and at home”, her acting coach told the high court in London as she outlined her growing suspicions that the Pirates of the Caribbean actor was hitting his wife.

    Kristina Sexton, Heard’s friend and then acting coach, said she had not seen Depp “hit, kick or throw anything” at Heard, but she was aware of the “volatility” of their relationship and had “overheard some serious fights” while waiting to start her coaching sessions.

    Heard told her Depp wanted her “barefoot and pregnant – and at home”, she said, and that Depp did not like the work his wife was auditioning for, especially any role “that was overtly sexual”, which he called “whore parts”, she claimed.

    Heard became a “nervous wreck” at auditions because she feared Depp’s reaction, Sexton said.

    At one audition in April 2016, Heard was anxious about reapplying her make-up, she added. “It made me think that she was covering up a black eye or some sort of bruise – and I asked her directly: ‘Did he hit you?’”

    Heard said she did not want to talk about it, Sexton said. She had asked if Heard “felt safe” and if there was “anything I could do”.

    She added: “But after I pressed her about it, she then admitted he had hit her. She admitted to me: ‘Yeah, he pushes and shoves me, he’s done some things.’”

    Depp, 57, is suing the Sun’s publisher, News Group Newspapers, and its executive editor, Dan Wootton, over an article that called him a “wife beater” and referred to “overwhelming evidence” that he had attacked Heard. Depp denies ever hitting Heard, 34, who has submitted details of 14 occasions during their relationship when she claims he assaulted her.

    Eleanor Laws QC, for Depp, put it to Sexton that Heard did not tell her any allegations about physical violence until after she had announced it to the world in May 2016. Sexton replied she knew about the emotional issues before, but heard about the physical incidents a few days before they became public.


    Laws added: “I am going to suggest to you that you have been extremely keen to support Miss Heard to stay in her favour.” Sexton replied: “Absolutely not. I haven’t worked with her for years.”

    Another close friend of Heard’s told the high court she had witnessed the aftermath of Depp’s alleged physical attacks on his wife.

    Raquel Pennington claimed she had seen Heard’s forearms “scratched and bloody, from her wrists to her elbows”, after the couple returned from Australia. In Los Angeles, she claimed she saw Heard’s head “bloody where a chunk of her hair had been ripped out” and that she had a swollen nose and a bleeding lip.

    Pennington said she called a private nurse, and took photographs on her phone. The next day, Heard appeared on the James Corden TV show, with her stylist and makeup assistants “in damage control mode”, she said in her witness statement.

    Laws asked: “At no stage did you ever see Mr Depp hit or beat Amber Heard, did you?” She replied: “I didn’t see him beat or hit her.”

    Laws put it to her: “You have lied and lied again on behalf of your friend, Miss Heard, in relation to the injuries you have seen or claimed to see.” Pennington replied: “Absolutely not.”

    Of the photographs she took, Laws asked her: “You were cataloguing things for her that didn’t happen. That’s right, isn’t it?”

    “That’s not right,” said Pennington.

    Earlier, Heard’s sister, Whitney Henriquez, denied she was beaten up by her after video footage was emailed overnight to Depp’s legal team by a confidential source of her allegedly showing injuries to friends on a 2006 reality TV show.

    Henriquez is seen in rushes with one woman remarking: “I can’t believe Amber beat your ass,” and another commenting: “She really did woop your butt.” Another appeared to inspect Henriquez’s cheek and arm, with Henriquez saying she was not going to talk about it.

    Heard has claimed she was never violent towards Depp, and only hit him once in defence of her sister during a fight on the staircase of their Los Angeles penthouse.

    David Sherborne, for Depp, claimed the video showed Henriquez had lied to the court when she denied Heard had ever hit her or that she was “frightened” of her sister.

    Henriquez told the high court the video only referenced “a verbal argument” between her and her sister, not a “physical fight”.

    Denying she had lied to the court to support her sister’s case of alleged domestic violence, Henriquez said: “I’m here because she was the victim of domestic violence, and for no other reason. I’m here to tell the truth.”

    Sherborne, said the video had been emailed on Thursday night, hours after Henriquez, told the court her sister had never attacked her.

    He said the reliability of Henriquez was “critical”, as the “stairs incident” – in which Heard’s sister claimed to have witnessed Depp punching and hitting Heard – was the only occasion “on which any other human being” is supposed to have witnessed Depp being violent towards Heard.

    Sasha Wass QC, for News Group Newspapers, said the film was “an undated piece of film footage in circumstances which appear to be some sort of reality TV programme, which is flippant, certainly not serious”.

    She said: “This is a light-hearted exchange, there is no evidence of any injuries and it will take the matter… no further.”

    The case continues.

    https://www.theguardian.com/film/202...against-sister

  11. #146
    Elite Member levitt's Avatar
    Join Date
    Sep 2008
    Location
    the sin bin
    Posts
    15,377

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by funky_chicken View Post
    I'm so sorry for everything you had to go through. And I'm so glad you all came out of it. I was with a man like that for a while but I managed to end the relationship before it got worse. And it took me years to realise how toxic he was and that the woman he turned me into wasn't who I really am. And that was just the damage from 3 years.
    Same here. My ex brought the absolute worst out in me. He would wind me up and frustrate me that I'd get so angry. I threw pillows and cushions to relieve the tension (never at him, just at the wall). Before him I never got angry with a partner.

    I've seen a lot of his behaviours in a new light since we broke up. He wasn't physically abusive but he certainly was emotionally. The kind I find hard to explain, or put into words. Where I couldn't do right for wrong. He'd tell me not to text him, and if I did what he said, he'd wait a few hours then say I didn't love him because I hadn't text him. Or he'd text me at a time he'd know I would be asleep and say 'if you don't text me back right now I know you don't love me'. I cannot believe I stayed with him for 2 years before seeing through his shit. I was the worst kind of me with him, his toxicity was so that it made me toxic too.

    Oh, and my last two boyfriends had a habit of texting me when I was out with friends/colleagues and trying to start an argument or upset me, so I'd associate having fun with other people as negative and to keep me with them/at home.
    Ain't nothing wrong with Ohio wang! - MontanaMama

  12. #147
    Elite Member Novice's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2006
    Location
    Beyond Caring, then hang a left.
    Posts
    47,308

    Default

    Quote Originally Posted by levitt View Post
    Same here. My ex brought the absolute worst out in me. He would wind me up and frustrate me that I'd get so angry. I threw pillows and cushions to relieve the tension (never at him, just at the wall). Before him I never got angry with a partner.

    I've seen a lot of his behaviours in a new light since we broke up. He wasn't physically abusive but he certainly was emotionally. The kind I find hard to explain, or put into words. Where I couldn't do right for wrong. He'd tell me not to text him, and if I did what he said, he'd wait a few hours then say I didn't love him because I hadn't text him. Or he'd text me at a time he'd know I would be asleep and say 'if you don't text me back right now I know you don't love me'. I cannot believe I stayed with him for 2 years before seeing through his shit. I was the worst kind of me with him, his toxicity was so that it made me toxic too.

    Oh, and my last two boyfriends had a habit of texting me when I was out with friends/colleagues and trying to start an argument or upset me, so I'd associate having fun with other people as negative and to keep me with them/at home.
    Yep there are two controlling behaviours right there. My last bf was the same. Oh yeah & text me breaking up with me 10 minutes right before a *really* important work meeting that needed 110% of my attention.

    And people wonder why I am happy being single with my dog.... At least I know she's a bitch
    Trixie, levitt, SHELLEE and 2 others like this.

  13. #148
    Elite Member MsDark's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2005
    Location
    Northwest MS/Memphis TN
    Posts
    31,697

    Default

    This is why once out of an abusive situation it's good to stay single for awhile. It gives you time to remember who you are again, or who you used to be before experiencing years of being berated and beaten down emotionally. It takes more time than even I was able to admit to myself for awhile to achieve a complete reset. In the rational part of my brain I felt "over it" long before I truly was.

    A hint that you need more time is if you are still finding yourself (when dating, relating, relationshipping) in similar situations with what turns out to be similar types of men or friends. If you're still finding yourself attracted to the same types of people, that's a red flag that you need to work on yourself more and figure out why you keep attracting these people. Or why you are attracted to these types.

    It's easier said than done to break out of these patterns, I know from personal experience. That is probably why I don't even date now. Probably why I still second guess everything and will continue to for some time to come. Especially when I'm finding myself instantly attracted.

    Another thing I've noticed after years of working on this... In being single now for a long time I've been able to reconnect with lots of people who fell by the wayside when I was wrapped up in trying to hold everything together in my identity as being MrsD. There are about two people in particular that I found myself back around (one we're back in the same circle professionally) that I now see controlling and other toxic type behaviors that I know I need to distance myself from. And in looking back over the years I have to be painfully honest with myself that even as much as I felt like I liked and connected with these people in the past, their "bad" behaviors were always there. And they are not good for me.

    And since I can't avoid one of these people, I've had to find a way to maintain friendly and working relationship without letting myself be taken advantage of or screwed over. It is exhausting when I feel I can't truly trust someone to be able to be myself around them and have to second guess every interaction I have with them. And it drains a bit of my spirit when I have to be around someone I have to keep my guard with while at the same time appearing as if I'm doing anything but. I'm not good at "fake" friendships. This person is someone who although we're more professionally than personally involved, considered me a good friend and confidant for years. We could talk and joke and vent about job bullshit for hours on the phone.

    I can tell they have had one or two "wtf happened to/with her over the years?" moments of suspicion with me since we've been back in touch because I have a hard time faking like I see this person in the same light and feel the same way about them as I used to. I could see it in their face and expressions when they did.

    Sometimes I miss not being able to see the things I do now in people. Especially when it catches me off guard. Because it means I have to let people go or at least have boundaries where I didn't used to. I can't enjoy them like I used to. I know overall this is probably a better thing. And it's really made me treasure the people who aren't like this.

    And hope that I'm getting better at attracting and being attracted to the sort of people in my life who are not likely to be manipulative, controlling or other forms of abusive.
    Novice and Merlot-N-Bali like this.
    My Posts Have Won Awards. Can Any Of You Claim The Same? -ur_next_ex

    "I don't have pet peeves. I have major psychotic fucking hatreds, okay". ~George Carlin

  14. #149
    Bronze Member Marmar2's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2016
    Posts
    140

    Default

    I'm surprised to see lots of Johnny Depp's fanatics and hysterical defenders on social media and other sites, are they real or paid by JD's team?!! They remind me of Michael Jackson's delusional fans. BTW, I'm team no one. Johnny and Amber were/are both revolting and psychos .

  15. #150
    Elite Member effie2's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2006
    Location
    Where it all begun
    Posts
    16,291

    Default

    Well said,Mrs Dark,every word is well thought and true.I might add if i am allowed the people doing real damage are these advising you during this crucial time,to water your wine as we greeks say.It means to mellow and relax and not kick people out of your life..and what is the matter with YOU?you knew that friend so many years,why now?And we reach the top...YOU WILL END UP ALONE and only the bad ones live and die alone...BEWARE..i ve had that shit for a long time.I gathered all my inner power and refused to buckle.Along with the abusive ex ,went everything that bothered me.Even my relationship with my kids had to restart in a new basis...Painful and tiring but i did it.There are a few precious relatives and friends in my life now,i love them all dearly.But the biggest lesson i ve learned is to be myself,s best friend and love my alone time.I happily live alone,travel alone and cherish every minute of it.And my great victory...i havent turned into a mean man hater..i believe there are good people out there.
    lindsaywhit and Merlot-N-Bali like this.

Thread Information

Users Browsing this Thread

There are currently 1 users browsing this thread. (0 members and 1 guests)

Similar Threads

  1. Johnny Depp and Amber Heard
    By dowcat in forum Famous Style
    Replies: 34
    Last Post: June 19th, 2016, 08:46 PM
  2. Johnny Depp and Amber Heard
    By Honey in forum Famous Style
    Replies: 15
    Last Post: June 11th, 2016, 10:06 PM
  3. Johnny Depp and Amber Heard
    By sprynkles in forum Famous Style
    Replies: 32
    Last Post: January 6th, 2016, 11:43 PM
  4. Johnny Depp and Amber Heard in Australia
    By dowcat in forum Famous Style
    Replies: 21
    Last Post: April 22nd, 2015, 02:48 PM
  5. Johnny Depp and Amber Heard
    By Honey in forum Famous Style
    Replies: 19
    Last Post: April 24th, 2014, 04:24 PM

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •