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Thread: Tom Cruise is slowly taking over the East Village

  1. #1
    Elite Member mrs.v's Avatar
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    Default Tom Cruise is slowly taking over the East Village

    Tommy Girl Is Taking Over The East Village




    Please stock up on Easy Mac, Count Chocula and Astrolglide, because I might be coming over for a lengthy visit soon.
    You see, Tommy Girl is taking over the East Village part of Manhattan !
    Page Six reports that in the last two months Tommy Girl has bought up several apartments in his East Village building. When Tommy and his lil' robots came to town, they set up camp in a 10th floor apartment he's owned since the 80s. They decided they needed to expand, so he bought 4 more apartments.
    A source said, "They turned one into Suri's playroom. One they use for a gym, and two apartments are for staff. They're all separate and on different floors. Tom is seen coming in and out all the time, and he's really friendly to everyone he meets. But Katie just kind of keeps her head down. Everyone in the neighborhood is buzzing about it."

    This is how it starts. Soon Tommy will own the whole building and then another and another and another... Before you know it the neighborhood will be filled with robots, alien fuckers and repressed homos with hungry genitals. Wait. Repressed homos are a sure thing, right? What am I thinking?! If I suck Scientolocock, the aliens win! E.T. will never get me!

    Tommy Girl Is Taking Over The East Village | Dlisted
    eat a hot bowl of dicks.

  2. #2
    Elite Member Belinda's Avatar
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    It was only a matter of time before he moved there to keep an eye on KatE.

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    Quote Originally Posted by Belindagogo View Post
    It was only a matter of time before he moved there to keep an eye on KatE.
    Yeah, and here I was thinking she had gotten herself a little reprieve.

    Before you know it the neighborhood will be filled with robots, alien fuckers and repressed homos with hungry genitals


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    I don't know what happened to those two but they got uglyfied.

    Broken teeth, crooked smiles, alien eyeballs, noses all over the place - uglyfied.

  5. #5
    Elite Member Chalet's Avatar
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    I worked in this building about 6 years ago. It's the American Felt Building at 114 East 13th Street. The building is very old and many of the apartments have been renovated. The ceilings are about 14' feet high. The lobby is nothing, no amenities, just a security guard, no concierge or doorman. The hallways are ugly and dark. The street is ugly. I guess he really wants privacy. Each apartment is different. No views.

    Tom and Mimi Rogers owned two combined apartments when they got married.


  6. #6
    Elite Member MissVenus's Avatar
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    He scares me. You know he's trying to buy the whole building and fill it with Scieobots to keep an eye on KatE.
    vaya con dios

  7. #7
    Friend of Gossip Rocks! buttmunch's Avatar
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    They forgot to mention he has one flat for his secret little trysts.
    'Those who sacrifice liberty for security deserve neither.' Ben Franklin

    "When fascism comes to America, it will be wrapped in the flag and carrying the cross."
    --Sinclair Lewis

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    Gold Member Linne's Avatar
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    So Suri has her own apartment on a different floor there? Kind of sad that she doesn't play at the apartment they live in...

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    Elite Member cmmdee's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by GaPeach View Post
    I don't know what happened to those two but they got uglyfied.

    Broken teeth, crooked smiles, alien eyeballs, noses all over the place - uglyfied.
    The price you pay when you sell your soul...

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Linne View Post
    So Suri has her own apartment on a different floor there? Kind of sad that she doesn't play at the apartment they live in...
    Suri will probably be better off the less time she spends with her "father", Tom...

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