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Thread: Shia LaBeouf can't get laid

  1. #1
    Elite Member mrs.v's Avatar
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    Default Shia LaBeouf can't get laid




    Shia LaBeouf was trying to get a little nanni at the Beatrice Inn in NYC the other night, but there weren't any takers. Page Six reports that Shia was "desperately seeking a lady . . . but none of the hipster hotties were standing for it." Those dumb skanks! The dude has been arrested at a Walgreens! That's reason enough to fuck him.
    Shia was apparently so hard up for coochie that he turned to one chick and said, "How do I get a girl to go home with me?" That line would work on me, but I'm a sure thing. Even the line, "How are you?" immediately makes me take off my clothes.
    Shia should have tried a different bar and by "different bar" I mean my apartment.



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    eat a hot bowl of dicks.

  2. #2
    Elite Member NicoleWasHere's Avatar
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    Too bad.

  3. #3
    Elite Member RevellingInSane's Avatar
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    WHAT! So he is lamer than lame and apparently a pot head. He still qualifies as a potential booty call candidate? I'm gonna say it. I'D HIT THAT! It's just a bit of nookie; I'm not trying to marry him.

    He wasn't asking the right women. Need directions darlin'? Take my word, young, horny, and laid back by the cannabis means he love you long time and takes his time....or so I have been told.



  4. #4
    Elite Member Grimmlok's Avatar
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    "Hey I'm a rich moviestar, I was in Transformers and the new Indiana Jones movie directed by Steven Spielberg. Fuck me."

    Oughta work.
    I am from the American CIA and I have a radio in my head. I am going to kill you.

  5. #5
    Elite Member Sweetie's Avatar
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    I like him.

  6. #6
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    Baby, come to Louisville. Mama take care of ya.

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    credit: the smoking gun Shia LaBeouf Busted - November 5, 2007

  8. #8
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    he was cute in Disturbia.

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    his eyes are so glazed in that arrest photo, lol
    Last edited by ingi; April 21st, 2008 at 12:19 PM.

  10. #10
    Elite Member msdeb's Avatar
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    can you picture having sex with him, and yelling out his name 'Fuck me Shia!!' sounds funny lol
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  11. #11
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    Aww, he looks so lonely and desperate in that top photo, like he's saying "Please take me home and fuck me, I'm not such a bad guy". He's sweet looking, and purdy.

  12. #12
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    he looks like he's twelve

    nah couldn't do it either

  13. #13
    Elite Member Gen X EJC's Avatar
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    After reading/hearing his interviews I think my response to any pickup line would be punching him in the face. Actually that would be a good day. On a bad day I'm pretty sure I would get a broken glass and give him a nose job.
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    Elite Member sparkly's Avatar
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    ^MEOW lolol

    I'm sitting here laughing my ass off at his desperation. I bet he's a jackrabbit humper.
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  15. #15
    Elite Member RevellingInSane's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Gen X EJC View Post
    After reading/hearing his interviews I think my response to any pickup line would be punching him in the face. Actually that would be a good day. On a bad day I'm pretty sure I would get a broken glass and give him a nose job.
    DAYUM! Just...DAYUM! Ok, so going out to the clubs here is probably something you should never do. You'd get a lifelong state paid vacation.

    As for his mugshot, yea, his beautiful eyes are glazed, but there is still something about him...



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