Shia LaBeouf can't get laid

**mrs.v** · April 21st, 2008, 10:47 AM

Shia LaBeouf was trying to get a little nanni at the Beatrice Inn in NYC the other night, but there weren't any takers. Page Six reports that Shia was "desperately seeking a lady . . . but none of the hipster hotties were standing for it." Those dumb skanks! The dude has been arrested at a Walgreens! That's reason enough to fuck him.
Shia was apparently so hard up for coochie that he turned to one chick and said, "How do I get a girl to go home with me?" That line would work on me, but I'm a sure thing. Even the line, "How are you?" immediately makes me take off my clothes.
Shia should have tried a different bar and by "different bar" I mean my apartment.

Shia Can't Get Laid | Dlisted

**NicoleWasHere** · April 21st, 2008, 10:48 AM

Too bad.

**RevellingInSane** · April 21st, 2008, 10:48 AM

WHAT! So he is lamer than lame and apparently a pot head. He still qualifies as a potential booty call candidate? I'm gonna say it. I'D HIT THAT! It's just a bit of nookie; I'm not trying to marry him.

He wasn't asking the right women. Need directions darlin'? Take my word, young, horny, and laid back by the cannabis means he love you long time and takes his time....or so I have been told.

**Grimmlok** · April 21st, 2008, 10:48 AM

"Hey I'm a rich moviestar, I was in Transformers and the new Indiana Jones movie directed by Steven Spielberg. Fuck me."

Oughta work.

**Sweetie** · April 21st, 2008, 10:49 AM

I like him.

**baked_tater** · April 21st, 2008, 10:49 AM

Baby, come to Louisville. Mama take care of ya.

**ingi** · April 21st, 2008, 11:40 AM

credit: the smoking gun Shia LaBeouf Busted - November 5, 2007

**wheelbarrow** · April 21st, 2008, 11:43 AM

he was cute in Disturbia.

**ingi** · April 21st, 2008, 11:44 AM

his eyes are so glazed in that arrest photo, lol

**msdeb** · April 21st, 2008, 11:45 AM

can you picture having sex with him, and yelling out his name 'Fuck me Shia!!' sounds funny lol

**Sasha** · April 21st, 2008, 11:54 AM

Aww, he looks so lonely and desperate in that top photo, like he's saying "Please take me home and fuck me, I'm not such a bad guy". He's sweet looking, and purdy.

**GaPeach** · April 21st, 2008, 11:56 AM

he looks like he's twelve

nah couldn't do it either

**Gen X EJC** · April 21st, 2008, 12:17 PM

After reading/hearing his interviews I think my response to any pickup line would be punching him in the face. Actually that would be a good day. On a bad day I'm pretty sure I would get a broken glass and give him a nose job.

**sparkly** · April 21st, 2008, 01:22 PM

^MEOW lolol

I'm sitting here laughing my ass off at his desperation. I bet he's a jackrabbit humper.

**RevellingInSane** · April 21st, 2008, 01:34 PM

Originally Posted by Gen X EJC

After reading/hearing his interviews I think my response to any pickup line would be punching him in the face. Actually that would be a good day. On a bad day I'm pretty sure I would get a broken glass and give him a nose job.

DAYUM! Just...DAYUM! Ok, so going out to the clubs here is probably something you should never do. You'd get a lifelong state paid vacation.

As for his mugshot, yea, his beautiful eyes are glazed, but there is still something about him...