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Thread: Charles Manson and fiancée registered at Bed Bath & Beyond

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    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    Default Charles Manson and fiancée registered at Bed Bath & Beyond

    The Mansons Are Registered at Bed Bath & Beyond

    Not even kidding:

    As I'm sure you know by now, or if not I'm telling you, Charles Manson and Afton Elaine Burton were issued a marriage license on November 7. The bride is an attractive 26-year-old who hails from the Midwest, while the groom is a not-at-all-attractive 80-year-old currently residing in Corcoran, California, where he is serving a life sentence for several notoriously brutal murders. No date has been set for the nuptials, but the prison has assigned a wedding coordinator, and the license is good until February.
    And they do appear to be registered at Bed Bath & Beyond.
    Are these actually the same Mansons (or future Mansons)? The event date is given as Sept. 21, 2014, which is obviously wrong. But the Associated Press reports that "Burton goes by the name 'Star.'" And that is good enough for me to conclude that what we have here is in fact a wedding gift registry for Charles Manson and his unblushing bride, or at least a test run.
    At the moment, no gifts have been purchased, so it's wide open for you. I actually don't see a knife set on the list, but please don't get them the flatware, or the fondue forks, or even the grapefruit spoons, which I bet Charlie could sharpen pretty handily.
    Helter Skelter!


    The Mansons Are Registered at Bed Bath & Beyond - Lowering the Bar
    Brookie likes this.
    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

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    "What's traitors, precious?" -- President Gollum

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    Elite Member witchcurlgirl's Avatar
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    I can use my 20% off coupon!
    sluce, gas_chick, czb and 10 others like this.



    All of God's children are not beautiful. Most of God's children are, in fact, barely presentable.


    If I wanted the government in my womb I'd fuck a Senator

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    Elite Member Fly_On_TheWall's Avatar
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    One of the women on The Talk said they should be registered at Bloodbath and beyond.

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    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    Fly_On_TheWall likes this.
    As Canadian as possible under the circumstances

    --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------


    "What's traitors, precious?" -- President Gollum

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    Elite Member gas_chick's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by witchcurlgirl View Post
    I can use my 20% off coupon!
    I have like 3 of them and a couple $5 off.
    I am going to come and burn the fucking house down... but you will blow me first."

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    Elite Member Ravenna's Avatar
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    Would it be bad etiquette to buy the bride-to-be something off registry, like, say, a gift certificate for inpatient psychiatric care?
    sluce, Calico Kid and stef like this.

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    Elite Member sluce's Avatar
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    I'll bet she has registered for a personal "massager" that is about 10 inches long.
    msdeb, Laurent, spinmonkey and 1 others like this.
    You don't engage with crazies. Because they're, you know, fucking crazy. - WitchCurlGirl

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    Elite Member levitt's Avatar
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    The Beatles greatest hits?
    Ain't nothing wrong with Ohio wang! - MontanaMama

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    Elite Member Trixie's Avatar
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    These people don't give a fuck about YOU or us. It's a message board, for Christ's sake. ~ mrs.v ~
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    Elite Member sputnik's Avatar
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    They're gonna need a lot of dark towels.
    I'm open to everything. When you start to criticise the times you live in, your time is over. - Karl Lagerfeld

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    Elite Member MohandasKGanja's Avatar
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    I've already ordered them this scale through the site - because it includes a helpful "% Batshit" measurement:


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    Elite Member Charmed Hour's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by levitt View Post
    The Beatles greatest hits?
    Or something by Brian Wilson, maybe?

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    Elite Member llamamama's Avatar
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    I watched a short interview with the woman last night. It is just so incredible that after all these years he is still able to get women (OK at least one) to follow him. He even convinced her to shave her head and carve an X in a forehead a while back to protest when he was put in solitary. She was talking about how amazing he is and all about ATWA, his theory on environmentalism. She would definitely kill somebody if he told her to.

    ETA: She manages his websites, he said this last year:

    "The will of God is what we’re dealing with, we’re not dealing with man’s will – we already know man’s will is destroying everything. We’re dealing with the air we’re breathing, soldier, it’s the air that we breathe.

    The Marine Drill Sergeant, it comes out of service, gets up on the train. He’s got a straight razor in his pocket, and he’s gonna get on a box car and ride around, and clean up the air. Because he’s got other people coming that are right behind him, ‘cause they’re falling out of the thing that ain’t working. And all the things that ain’t working are gonna come here with the chickens, sweetheart.

    My little red chicken, in Warwood mountaintop, over there with pigs and slop, over there in tip top and be-bop, over there in Florida’s gang, over there with Castro and the Navy’s man. Everywhere I got, I got a ship in the sea. That’s the way I’m doing it pirate – the pirates are George Washington’s Navy.

    George Washington’s Navy is the Sons of Liberty. Truth. Semper Fi, there’s no doubt, breathe in and breathe out. Attention! Breathe in and breathe out. There’s no confusion, nothing to think about. Air is God. "


    WTF??

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    Elite Member gas_chick's Avatar
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    And she can't blame the drugs he's giving her.
    llamamama likes this.
    I am going to come and burn the fucking house down... but you will blow me first."

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    Elite Member ConstanceSpry's Avatar
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    If they register at Pipebombs R Us I'll be happy to send them a ticking pressie.
    sluce and Trixie like this.
    'I had to get rid of the kid. The cat was allergic.'

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