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Thread: Jessa Duggar Is Being Courted by a Boy Named Ben

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    Elite Member Bluebonnet's Avatar
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    Default Jessa Duggar Is Being Courted by a Boy Named Ben

    Jessa Duggar Enters Courtship with Ben Seewald

    By Alicia Dennis
    09/16/2013 at 05:00 PM EDT



    Jessa Duggar and Ben Seewald
    Courtesy of Jim Bob Duggar


    Could a Duggar daughter be preparing to start a family of her own?

    Jessa Duggar, 20, the third daughter of Jim Bob and Michelle Duggar of Tontitown, Ark.,has entered into a courtship with Ben Seewald, 18, who lives in nearby Hot Springs, Ark., PEOPLE confirms.

    The couple's relationship will be featured on the family's TLC show, 19 Kids & Counting, which returns Tuesday at 9 p.m.

    "We are so excited for Ben and Jessa," Jim Bob, 48, tells PEOPLE. "They are enjoying getting to know each other and are recommending sermons to one another."
    So what are the differences between courtship and dating?

    Jim Bob explains: "Courting is getting to know each other in a group setting, both families spending time together and the couple setting goals together to determine if they are meant to marry. With dating, a couple will often pair off alone and that sometimes leads to a more physical relationship."

    Jessa and Ben met in church, Jim Bob says, and then asked to correspond via text and on the phone. The Duggars agreed – and were kept in the conversation as the couple texted each other, mostly asking each other questions about theology and scripture.

    "Jessa has a very steady personality," says Michelle. "It has been interesting to watch their interactions because for her personality type, they share very similar beliefs. It has been fun to watch them and both of our phones are going off back and forth, ping, ping, ping."

    "Courtship is not just about having fun," she continues. "You are really considering if this person could be your life partner – you pray about it and see what happens."

    Though other men have approached Jim Bob to ask if they could begin a relationship with Jessa – as well as his other older daughters – Jim Bob says that Ben is the first to make the cut.

    "He's the first one she has shown interest in that has a spiritual focus and legitimate calling about ministry work," he says. "When a guy is pursing your daughter, you want to check him out and see if there are any red flags and with Ben, there hasn't been. He is very sharp. It appears like a match made in heaven."

    Like her older brother, Josh, whose courtship with now-wife Anna was documented on their reality show, Jessa will save her first kiss for marriage.

    "Dad allowed them to do a side hug when they were officially courting," Michelle, 47, explains. "Jessa and Ben have said that was the only contact they would have, when they initially greet each other, when he comes to visit for their first hello, they have a quick 30 second or less side hug and a goodbye side hug and they agreed that would be the only contact they should have."

    "They want to wait on the physical relationship until later," she adds. "If there is an engagement that comes about, they will work together on their goals and standards for that."


    Michelle and Jessa Duggar with Ben Seewald
    Courtesy of Jim Bob Duggar


    Jessa and three of her sisters – Jana, Jill and Jinger – have just completed the book Growing Up Duggar, to be released next year, about their relationships, including their thoughts about boys and what goes into deciding who and when to marry.

    "It is sweet as a mom to watch Jessa go through this," says Michelle. "She's always been the organizer in our family unit and right now she is a little distracted. She and Ben are open to encourage others who may be considering relationships that you can stay morally pure and wait for the one God has for you and then on your wedding day, begin the physical aspects of your relationship."

    "All the girls are excited for Jessa," says Jim Bob, whose other children are Joshua, 25 – who is married to Anna, 25 and has Mackynzie, 3, Michael, 2 and Marcus, 3 months –, twins Jana and John-David, 23; Jill, 22; Jinger, 19; Joseph, 18; Josiah, 17; Joy-Anna, 15; twins Jedidiah and Jeremiah, 14; Jason, 13; James, 12; Justin, 11; Jackson, 9; Johanna, 7; Jennifer, 6; and Jordyn, 4, and Josie, 3, who was born prematurely).

    "All of our family is involved in this relationship. It is an exciting time."
    Last edited by Bluebonnet; September 17th, 2013 at 01:03 PM.
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    Elite Member Kittylady's Avatar
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    "They are enjoying getting to know each other and are recommending sermons to one another."

    The excitement must be overwhelming for the both of them.
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    is there such a thing as dating and not getting married in this family? it just seems like the partner is picked like some sort of arranged marriage.
    spinmonkey likes this.
    can't post pics because my computer's broken and i'm stupid

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    Elite Member KrisNine's Avatar
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    Jessa is the only one that's pretty.
    olivia, Beeyotch and Rachel like this.

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    Was gonna say, she's quite pretty.
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    Elite Member MsDark's Avatar
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    The pretty one, of course. It weirds me out that a 20 year old woman's parents are this involved in her potential love life like she's a piece of property. Those texts probably go to the parents' phones too, so they can read them all. Daddy "let" her do a side hug? :::shudder::: Is he going to stand outside the door on the wedding night?

    I'm sorry, these young men and women deserve to have some privacy in their relationships. I know these parents have this idea of what they want for these kids...and in that world the ground would open up and swallow them into the depths of hell if they even :::gasp::: kissed, but gimmie a break. At some point you just have to let go. What a shitty, sad existence. I can't imagine not even being able to have a conversation with someone of the opposite sex that I wasn't related to without mom and dad all up in there.

    These parents are like cattle-traders/breeders with these kids. It's disgusting. I've got my fingers crossed at least one of these kids does something like sneak out of the house to make out, get drunk, get laid, have gay sex.
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    Elite Member MsDark's Avatar
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    Their way is too extreme IMO. There is nothing romantic about your mom and dad reviewing every interaction between you two.

    If he snuck up to her window to steal a kiss that would be romantic. But he'd never be allowed to see her again if that happened.
    C_is_for_Cookie and Callalily like this.
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    Elite Member levitt's Avatar
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    "All of our family is involved in this relationship."
    Terrifying.
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    He's the only one that was Jimbob approved? Run, Jessa, RUN!
    hustle4alivin and Lalasnake like this.
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    Wrong, creepy, and unnatural -- it's the Duggar way!
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    Elite Member C_is_for_Cookie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MrsDark View Post
    Their way is too extreme IMO. There is nothing romantic about your mom and dad reviewing every interaction between you two.

    If he snuck up to her window to steal a kiss that would be romantic. But he'd never be allowed to see her again if that happened.
    If he tried that, there would be 8 snitches there to tell mom and dad, all the girls room together in one big dorm. So do the boys.

    The one who seems least interested in kids is being married off early, so she can start popping out the 'blessings' asap. Poor girl.
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    An 18 year old boy and a 20 year old girl. It seems like the maturity levels would be all wonky, but I guess it wouldn't matter here, anyway.
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    Super Moderator twitchy2.0's Avatar
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    Golly, a side hug! How swell!



    Christian Side Hug[FULL SONG] - YouTube


    Video will not embed.
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    Elite Member aabbcc's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Kittylady View Post
    "They are enjoying getting to know each other and are recommending sermons to one another."

    The excitement must be overwhelming for the both of them.
    Jessa and Ben met in church, Jim Bob says, and then asked to correspond via text and on the phone. The Duggars agreed – and were kept in the conversation as the couple texted each other, mostly asking each other questions about theology and scripture.

    I know! Could this be more romantic? I'm swooning.
    C_is_for_Cookie likes this.

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    Elite Member Bluebonnet's Avatar
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    Well, if Jessa and Ben are both Christians, of course discussing scripture/theology/sermons is a mutual interest. Ma and Pa hovering? Yeah...that would get old fast.
    southernbelle likes this.
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