Nigella Lawson says her mother didn't like her and hit her brother

[rollo]

'She just didn't like me': Nigella Lawson reveals agonising relationship with her depressed mother 'who hit her brother'

By Anna Edwards
PUBLISHED: 12:34, 4 November 2012 | UPDATED: 17:06, 4 November 2012


Her television shows are imbued with her cheerful, passionate character and her enthusiasm for the good life.
But behind the merry facade Nigella Lawson, one of Britain's most popular food writers, hides a childhood scarred with the memories of a depressive mother and an unorthodox relationship with her father.
The celebrated cook, married to art-collector Charles Saatchi and mother of two, has endured a lifetime of agony.

Nigella, far left, says she had a funny but depressed mother (pictured on phone), seen here with Nigel Lawson and daughter Thomasina


Her mother, Vanessa Salmon, died of liver cancer at the age of 48 when Nigella was only 25, her younger sister Thomasina died from breast cancer aged 32 when the cook was 32, and her first husband John Diamond, a journalist, died in 2001 aged 41 of throat cancer.

The 52-year-old explains how her childhood was spent flitting between different schools and clashing with her mother who, she says quite simply: 'Just didn't like me.'
Speaking to the Financial Times, she describes her mother, who married former Chancellor Nigel Lawson, as funny but deeply depressed, and would often lash out at her children if they made too much noise.
Nigella claims she had a unique relationship with her father Lord Nigel Lawson


Nigella, who was one of four, describes how her older brother Dominic was beaten by her mother so much that she had to eventually stop because it was hurting her hand too much.
She told the Financial Times magazine: 'She’d shout at all of us and say, "I’m going to hit you till you cry," and so I never would cry.'
Lawson, who is estimated to be worth £15million, says that as she grew older she started to have a happier relationship with her mother, despite her parents divorcing in 1980.
But although the Oxford University student came to be on better terms with her mother, Vanessa would still say distressing things to her daughter.
As her mother lay dying, she told Nigella that at least she could commit suicide now her daughter was an adult, as it would have been far worse to take her own life when Lawson was just a child, the magazine reported.
In a stark contrast to her mother's fierce outbursts, she claims her father, former Chancellor Nigel Lawson, was a relaxed, carefree parent.
He would congratulate her on being a terror at school but well-behaved at home, and encourage the young Nigella to have a drink of whiskey with him as she studied for her A-Levels as he did not like drinking alone.

Nigella insists that her television shows, known for her flirtatious manner, are nonsense, and branded suggestive by men.

Seen here with her first husband John Diamond, Nigella has endured both him, her mother and sister dying of cancer


The presenter says that women find her approachable and do not perceive her informal cooking style as flirty.
But after years of heartache, life is looking swell for the charismatic cook.
Her latest television show, Nigellissima, has aired on BBC 2 and been a huge success with her Italian-themed recipes.
She and her husband Charles Saatchi are inseparable, and the chef has a refreshingly relaxed attitude to the fats in her food, championing the importance of fat in cooking for flavour.

Art collector Charles Saatchi and Nigella Lawson are inseparable from each other, after moving in with each other in 2003

Nigella Lawson says that she has a happy family life after finding love again with Charles Saatchi


Appearing at this year's Cheltenham Literature Festival to talk about her new Italian style cookery book Nigellissima, she said that eating 'real food' rather than relying on ready meals was important for health and good skin.
She sad: 'On the whole your skin and your body and your mind are happier if you have food which is real and not processed bits of cardboard and whatever else it is.

'There is always room for a bit of junk food from time to time but you really need proper food to feel properly alive.'

And, despite her calorie-laden dishes, the mother has reached her goal of shaving off a little weight with a strict diet - details of which she Tweeted to her followers.



Read more: 'She just didn't like me': Nigella Lawson reveals agonising relationship with her depressed mother 'who hit her brother' | Mail Online

[Novice]

And her son is the spitting image of her mother.



tbh wasn't this "normal" then?

[rollo]

I think both her kids look like John Diamond.

It wasn't normal to be abusive to your kids I hope!

[Sarzy]

Normal?! No. Stuff like this makes me even more thankful for the parents I've got.

[greysfang]

Her first husband looked like an older David Letterman.

[Belt Up]

Goodness, what breathtaking children!

[BITTER]

That generation, of which I am on the tail end of, a lot of parents tended to be a bit too free with the physical discipline. Poor Nigella, to have to have a cray-cray momma. I've always loved her and have two of her cookbooks.

[WhateverLolaWants]

I think they look sweet. Not beautiful children, but self-possessed and comfortable in their own skin. She herself did not show signs of her beauty as a child, so perhaps they will grow into their looks.

Either way, I'm glad she went on to recognize the negative behavior from her mother for what it was rather than pay forward the behavior to her children. I hate hearing, "My mother beat me black and blue and it didn't hurt me any!" Well, except the 'black and blue' part, huh?

[A*O]

That pic of the kids is at least 8 years old. They have improved substantially with age. Her new series/book "Nigellissima" is rubbish but I constantly use some of her previous ones. I've seen her doing other stuff on TV and what strikes me most is that she has ZERO sense of humour zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

[TheGrimReader]

Really? I have always found her literary persona to be quite entertaining. Isn't she a capricorn? They tend toward a bit of reserve which can come across as lacking humor, though she seems pretty down-to-earth and self-aware and her books quite funny. Also her recipe writing is very well thought out and the recipes run perfectly. Her first husband really encouraged her down this path and he was a clearly a good judge of innate talent. And could she be any more beautiful?What was this thread about? Her mom. Right. Interesting, because reference to her mother in her books are all very positive and warm, without any undercurrent of resentment. Why is this coming up now? Like I said, girlfriend's a capricorn and they are not overly prone to revealing personal details- without a very good reason.

[aabbcc]

Really? I have always found her literary persona to be quite entertaining.

So do I. I love her writing. I've been watching Nigellissima on YouTube and I like it well enough. It seems to be better received than Kitchen, but I liked Kitchen as well (and I cook from that book quite a lot). A cooking blog I follow devoted last month to Nigellissima, and the blog authors really liked the book and the dishes they cooked from it. Nigella has stated that it isn't authentic Italian, but quick food based on the Italian genre. As long as the recipes work and taste good, I'm happy, and Nigella is always very dependable in that area.

[McJag]

I like her. I have set of her bowls, egg shapped and they are my fav.

[Air Quotes]

She has been through a lot!

As her mother lay dying, she told Nigella that at least she could commit suicide now her daughter was an adult, as it would have been far worse to take her own life when Lawson was just a child, the magazine reported.

My Mother has said things like this to me and I think its monumentally fucked up but it seems some moms just love to do shit like that.

[TheGrimReader]

That's her strong suit, I think - zeroing in on the attributes of a cuisine and figuring out how to express them in the sort of cooking one does everyday. She is a genius in that way. Have you tried her Moroccan Omelet? Mint and goat cheese. So simple, so awesome. It deserves its own FB page or Twitter hashtag.

[WhateverLolaWants]

She has been through a lot!


My Mother has said things like this to me and I think its monumentally fucked up but it seems some moms just love to do shit like that.

I wonder if there isn't this level of intimacy there that some moms think they can say the things most people think but never say aloud to their children? As in they think their child is still, like an infant, still an extension of themselves somehow? I don't know; my own mother, whom I love very much, once said to me, "You see connections that other people don't see. Watch that. It can get a person killed." It seemed like very odd advice from a mother to a daughter at a young age.