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Thread: Bret Michaels' unintentionally hilarious Christmas card

  1. #1
    Elite Member Laurent's Avatar
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    Default Bret Michaels' unintentionally hilarious Christmas card

    Exclusive: See Bret Michaels' Christmas Card!
    December 23, 2011 AT 6:41PM
    By Rebecca Macatee



    Bret Michaels is ready to rock out this holiday season!

    The 48-year-old musician shared his Christmas card exclusively with Us Weekly, and let us in on his plans for the big day.

    "My family wakes up at the crack of dawn," he told Us. "We grab guitars and jam!"

    Michaels has two daughters with Kristi Lynn Gibson: Raine, 11, and Jorja, 6. Last December, after 16 on-and-off years together, the rocker proposed to Gibson on the finale of his VH1 reality show, Bret Michaels: Life As I Know It.

    Read more: See Bret Michaels' Christmas Card! - UsMagazine.com

    ROFL, this thing looks like a homemade photoshop job and it cracks me up that he left his family out of it. It's all about him and the sad Santa hat, I guess.

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    Elite Member Jezi's Avatar
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    Wait, he's wishing me a... Bret Michaels? OK then.


    This reminds me of the Christmas Card I once whipped up. It was one of my very first Photoshop projects. I think I was 14. Mine looked better though.

  3. #3
    Elite Member CornFlakegrl's Avatar
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    Is it supposed to read "Wishing you a .... Bret Michaels" because it's not nice to wish THAT on anyone.

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    Elite Member fattymatty's Avatar
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    If you squint you can almost believe he's still 25.

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    Elite Member Mrs P's Avatar
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    Man, I'm so annoyed that I didn't get my butt down to Petsmart for a photo with Santa and my ferrets. Everyone at work was sending out cheesy 'Merry Christmas' emails of family Christmas photos today. I work with a lot of Mormons, and no offense, but they take some cheesy family photos. I would so have replied with my craziness!

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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs P View Post
    Man, I'm so annoyed that I didn't get my butt down to Petsmart for a photo with Santa and my ferrets. Everyone at work was sending out cheesy 'Merry Christmas' emails of family Christmas photos today. I work with a lot of Mormons, and no offense, but they take some cheesy family photos. I would so have replied with my craziness!
    I do pet pic cards. We go to a local shelter that does them with Santa for a donation. I have to look at everyone's kids, you can look at mine.

  7. #7
    Elite Member Mrs P's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Charmed Hour View Post
    I do pet pic cards. We go to a local shelter that does them with Santa for a donation. I have to look at everyone's kids, you can look at mine.
    Exactly! Fur kids are just as important. I used to get photos with Santa and my old ferret duo. I always sent it out in my Christmas card to family. I'm a bit bummed by boys didn't get a first Christmas photo.

    Man, if Santa and God were real, they'd bring Courtney Stodden's Christmas photo shoot to my living room in the morning. I could have one ferret shooting out of each boob a la Katy Perry Fireworks style.

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    Elite Member SoCalMarie's Avatar
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    I love how his name is the has the largest font on the card....

    His thought process: " Oh, my name doesn't fit on the bottom of the card with that size of font"? (where a signature is suppose to go).
    "Ok, well, let's switch my name with the message, people will still get the point"

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    Elite Member Bluebonnet's Avatar
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    Cool

    But what if I don't want BRET MICHAELS for Christmas? Why is he wishing BRET MICHAELS on people? Wasn't Rock of Love enough to put on anyone?!!

    Gotta love his narcissism.

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    Silver Member Jen84's Avatar
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    Merry Bret Michaels! But where are the hos??
    **Say Auf Wiedersehen to your NAZI Balls**

  11. #11
    Elite Member sweetness's Avatar
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    He looks like dollar store Christmas Barbie.

  12. #12
    Elite Member Icepik's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by sweetness View Post
    He looks like dollar store Christmas Barbie.
    OMG! This is the best description of Bret Michaels ever!

  13. #13
    Penske material sprynkles's Avatar
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    Oh man, merry Bret Michaels to you too dude! I was only going to celebrate Festivus this year. How fun!

    She is such a useless shit stain on the panties of humanity~Bitter's awesome description of K.K

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    Elite Member Trixie's Avatar
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    Merry Narcissistmas to you too, Bret!
    These people don't give a fuck about YOU or us. It's a message board, for Christ's sake. ~ mrs.v ~
    ~"Fuck off! Aim higher! Get a life! Get away from me!" ~the lovely and talented Miss Julia Roberts~



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    Hit By Ban Bus! Pippin's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mrs P View Post
    Man, I'm so annoyed that I didn't get my butt down to Petsmart for a photo with Santa and my ferrets. Everyone at work was sending out cheesy 'Merry Christmas' emails of family Christmas photos today. I work with a lot of Mormons, and no offense, but they take some cheesy family photos. I would so have replied with my craziness!
    Too late for that, eh? You can always bug your friends and relatives with Monk E Mail, though, to send Christmas (just pushing it) and/or New Year's greetings.

    I like to torture my Uncle Subnormal, my cousins and email buddies with it at this time of the year, specifically on New Year's Eve, as that is my favourite holiday of the entire year.

    Monk E Mail You'll have to wait a bit before the page loads, though. Seems I'm not the only one who likes to monkey around! This email program is more fun than a barrel full of monkeys.

    Why am I not being paid for all this free advertising?

    Resolution #1 -- Do not be such a dolt.

    I love making resolutions so I can quickly calculate how long it takes me to break 'em -- ten, fifteen minutes?

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