Jennifer Aniston Backlash Is Building

[mia981]

BOSTON - Public opinion researchers at Harvard and MIT have confirmed a rumor that a Jennifer Aniston backlash is building across the United States. The first hint of the back-
lash appeared in The Chronicle of Higher Education on December 2.

"What recently divorced actress is in danger of becoming so last year as a result of overexposure in 2005?" asked Felicia Johnson, Ph.D, editor of The Chronicle Review, the magazine section of The Chronicle.

Intrigued by Johnson's question, public opinion researchers at Harvard and MIT conducted a telephone poll of 1,452 faculty members of U.S. colleges and universities from December 12 through 16. According to the poll, which has a 3.143-percent margin of error, Aniston was named by an overwhelming majority of respondents as the star most likely to be eclipsed by her own popularity.

"I know I'm tired of hearing about her," said J. Randall Edwards, M.A., "and from what I can tell, students are way past being interested in her, too."

If she was still married to Brad Pitt, she wouldn't have received one tenth the coverage she did this year," said Gloria Pietro, Ph.D., dean of women's studies at the University of the Pacific in San Francisco.

"She owes her popularity not to her talent but to the fact that she was dumped for Angelina Jolie, the human equivalent of a black widow spider," added Pietro. "Jennifer's big change-of-face vehicle, Derailed, did squat at the box-office and was, according to Variety, one of the worst reviewed movies of 2005. Yet every time she breaks wind she makes news. Getting divorced was a great career move."
In addition to citing Aniston's "quietly understated mediocrity" as one cause of the perceived backlash against her, many academics pointed to her "self-serving, maudlin interviews" in Vanity Fair, GQ, and other publications.

"Underneath that Mona Lisa facade she was more whiney than a screw top Merlot," said Brian Persudzky, Ph.D., professor of computer science at Georgia Tech. "She thinks Brad Pitt is missing a sensitivity chip? She appears to be missing an intelligence chip, not to mention a spam filter."
Aniston also managed to offend Christian educators with her "curious penchant" for being photographed topless.

"Whether it's on the cover of magazines like GQ, in her backyard, or on a 'private' beach, Ms. Aniston doesn't appear to be shy about using her body to advance her career," said Imogene Walters, B.S., assistant professor of family studies at Bob Jones University.

"Then she adds insult to indecent exposure by suing the photographers she lured with her exposed flesh. That's like a fisherman suing a fish for ruining his bait."



In related news, Rumor Has It, which opens in theaters this weekend, may do little to turn the tide in Jennifer Aniston's favor. The movie, which also stars Kevin Costner, Shirley MacLaine, Kathy Bates, Mark Ruffalo, and Mena Suvari, is gathering headlines such as, "Rumor Has It this one's a real stinker."

The worst part of Rumor Has It wrote one reviewer, ". . . is the way Aniston is shot, as if the whole movie were all about her pert little body. It's actually creepy to watch, as if the director were stalking her with the camera

[olivia720]

wow. christmas came early for me. this sums up so much about her so well, that i wasnt able to quite articulate.
i agree that her mediocrity is in such unequal proportion to the massive overkill of her these days.
and yes, the topless shit, the sentimental corny interviews that revealed nothing but an attempt at warm fuzzies that was actually really off putting and inauthentic . . . it all adds up to: uhhhgg.

[Grimmlok]

In addition to citing Aniston's "quietly understated mediocrity" as one cause of the perceived backlash against her, many academics pointed to her "self-serving, maudlin interviews" in Vanity Fair, GQ, and other publications.

I FUCKING TOLD ALL YOU ANISTON-LOVERS! AHAHAHAHA

[heart_leigh]

I couldn't understand her appeal in the first place. I don't think she's a good actress. She's not thaaat pretty. She's way overrated. Frankly, she makes me want to puke.

[ourmaninBusan]

Firstly, let me say how surprised I am that people at MIT, Harvard
and Georgia Tech are devoting precious research time to the War
on Chiniston. If this isn't a hoax, then it's time for an audit of our
institutes of higher learning.

However, I like this part:

The worst part of Rumor Has It, wrote one reviewer,
". . . is the way Aniston is shot, as if the whole movie were all about
her pert little body. It's actually creepy to watch, as if the director
were stalking her with the camera

And they think this is an accident? It's about as accidental
as the building of a power plant. She's selling her expired milk.

[BarbaraAnne]

Ditto to all the above!! Finally, an article summing up how I have felt for some time . Can't believe I used to actually like her and enjoy watching the occasional "Friends" episode.

[glamazon]

although I don't agree about the photogs, this is WHY I can't get into her....she's MEDIOCRE! America loves some bland shit.

Angelina, for all the lovers and haters out there, is at LEAST a good actress and something to behold...

[ourmaninBusan]

From A Socialite's Life

December 20, 2005
Jennifer Aniston Gives Us Another Bomb
Filed under: Film , Jennifer Aniston


The film business has proven a tad bit more difficult to conquer than the television business for Jennifer Aniston. Her latest film, Rumor Has It, is receiving some pretty bad press.

"A Wreck" reads the headline above the review in the Hollywood Reporter. Variety opens its critique by labeling the comedy-drama "as muddled in most respects as its title." Both papers predict poor ticket sales.

In the movie, directed by Rob Reiner (When Harry Met Sally) and based loosely on the events that occurred in the 1962 Charles Webb novel and 1967 Michael Nichols movie The Graduate, Aniston plays an obituary writer for The New York Times who goes home to Southern California for her sister's wedding – and discovers for the first time that her granny, played by Shirley MacLaine, may have been the inspiration for the notorious "older woman" Mrs. Robinson, who seduced Benjamin Braddock, the then-recent college grad.

One of the commenters:

violette33 said:
I just saw a "coming attractions" for this movie. I was stunned, as was the rest of the audience. The theme was quite clear and ICKY!!!
I felt total embarrassment for Aniston and rest of cast.

[Cuz_I_Can]

haha, you all pretty much said everything that i was feeling. i am so tired of Chiniston and her big bag of bullshit. i wish she would just go away. her movies suck too. she's a horrible actress and isn't very pretty, i don't see her appeal at all. she's a boring bitter old bitch.

[wuwuwu]

best satirical article ever.

[olivia720]

actually the article isnt satrical. its literal. they're entirely serious.

[Grimmlok]

Some just can't accept that Chiniston isn't very well liked by people.

well, people with taste anyway.

[mia981]

i know they'd kill you over a bad word about her

[SVZ]

Do we really know what happens if you shoot someone to space without a helmet?

I mean really documented it? With a monkey and a camera and everything?

Because Aniston would be perfect.

[thrpschr]

"She thinks Brad Pitt is missing a sensitivity chip? She appears to be missing an intelligence chip, not to mention a spam filter."

I love geeks!