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Thread: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

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    Gold Member mia981's Avatar
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    Default Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    Rumor has it that father to be Tom Cruise has been frightening other expectant fathers with his tales of male nursing. Tom has been reportedly telling others that they can and should take part in nursing their babies. He also shared how he looks forward to doing so once his first child with fiancee Katie Holmes is born this coming spring.
    In other TomKat news, Tom has made it clear that he and Katie will not be featured in any upcoming joint magazine covers. Tom reportedly told insiders that he only approves of his co-stars from Mission: Impossible III like actresses Keri Russell, and not his real life love... Katie. His rep has also made a statement concerning a joint cover saying, "There are no plans for any Tom and Katie covers at this time."

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    A*O
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    This train wreck just gets better and better. I no longer feel sorry for Katie, she signed her contract with the devil, but I DO feel very for the the alien spawn. Let's hope the real father files for custody.
    If all the women in this place were laid end to end, I wouldn’t be surprised - Dorothy Parker

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    Gold Member mia981's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    isnt L Ron is a slumber chamber at the moment?

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    Friend of Gossip Rocks! buttmunch's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    Hmmm...I wonder what his stand is on breast feeding in public.
    'Those who sacrifice liberty for security deserve neither.' Ben Franklin

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    SVZ
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    hmm what's the soruce for this?

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    Elite Member cheray's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    Ok... finished vomitting......now what the hell is he talking about. Does he want to breast feed? Isnt he a bloke type of guy? Tittlie less sort of person? What the hell is wrong with that dickhead?

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    Elite Member darksithbunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    Oh man. I guess we will be seeing that everywhere. I told my husband about this and he said that did it for him. He said,"Yep, Tom is gay. I love my kids but I won't do that".

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    Silver Member euro-kitty's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    (Gagging)

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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    OK, Tom Cruise is officially wacko. Hello! Tom, you may think you know the history of psychiatry but you don't know shit about human anatomy. Men don't have mammary glands, you idiot!

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    Bronze Member savansa's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    Tom is the new Michael Jackson.

    They say women aren't supposed to breast feed b/c barley water and corn syrup is better for the baby (aaaargh) but apparently man "milk" or whatever it is is perfectly fine? Misogynistic jackholes.

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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    Fucking freak

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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    Quote Originally Posted by savansa
    They say women aren't supposed to breast feed b/c barley water and corn syrup is better for the baby (aaaargh)
    W H A T ? ! ? !?
    The Clams really espouse this???? Wouldn't that be child abuse? That's a proteinless diet! A baby couldn't really survive that, could it? I SO hope this isn't true! If it is, it's time for the child welfare to intervene!
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    Elite Member CherryDarling's Avatar
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    Someone PLEASE lock up this fruitcake before little L. Ron is born...my God, can he get any worse? I feel like a broken record saying that...next it'll be him giving the actual birth instead of Katie.
    Mischief. Mayhem. Tattoos. Soap.

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    A*O
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    Default Re: Tom Cruise to nurse new child...?

    It's interesting that we don't seem to hear anything from Stepford Katie at this special time - no interviews, no reported comments, no hint that she has any power of independent thought or opinion. Classic Scientology mind-control of course (hell, they even send minders into the bathroom with her) but SURELY her lobotomised brain can still process the fact that she's in deep trouble? She was never the brightest candle on the Christmas tree in the first place and therefore perfect material for a cult, but Tom's increasingly Jacksonesque pronouncements about things he knows fuck all about must be ringing some tiny alarm bells for her, and certainly her family.
    If all the women in this place were laid end to end, I wouldn’t be surprised - Dorothy Parker

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    Default Men "nursing" children - YES it is possible (read on)

    Ok... by way of disclaimer, I think I can shed a little light on this male breastfeeding grossness.

    I actually know how this worked. I thought it was weird as hell at first, but I knew a couple who tried this. It's odd, but not as bad as you're probably imagining after reading this thread.

    Unable to conceive, friends of mine went through an agency and were chosen by a birthmother to adopt her unborn baby. While they waited for the child to be born, they researched all kinds of adoption/parenting issues, and came upon this "simulated breastfeeding" product, which actually is common to help a baby "bond" to it's adoptive mother, by establishing herself as provider of nourishment. The theory is that babies can become confused by the absence of the birthmother, who provided all their instinctual comforts during pregnancy, which could lead to emotional or attachment issues later in life.

    This product was worn over the shoulder like a sling/vest almost, and held a bottle of formula/milk. Instead of being bottle fed by hand with a traditional nipple, this thing had thin rubber tubing that the baby fed from. You'd hold the baby in a normal nursing position, and the baby would "feed" from the tube. The baby doesn't know any different, so for all they know, they ARE nursing, and experience all the benefits and familiarity that nursing brings.

    Some enthusiastic parents choose to BOTH use the feeding system, giving them both the chance to bond with the baby, as well as be able to tradeoff midnight feedings, etc. Sounds strange, but the baby only knows it's being fed, and gets to know both parents.


    All that being said, thinking of Tom Cruise "nursing" anything, makes me throw up a little in my mouth.
    Don't start with me, you know how I get.

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