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Old December 1st, 2005, 01:23 PM   #1 (permalink)
stardust
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Default Katie grows

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When's the wedding, you ask? Well, contrary to published reports about haggling over the pre-nup, the Holmes family is not holding up the marital proceedings at all. That would imply that they have at least a modicum of influence in their daughter's new life. Which could not be further from the truth. But, Tom and Katie are indeed house hunting in Ohio - part of the deal, you see. I'll keep your girl close by if you keep your mouth shut about our relationship. And they don't really have much choice in the matter. Afterall, Scientologists can be quite convincing, you know.


And finally…in response to the hundreds of emails I've received about the true origin of this child. Umm…like was there ever a question? This baby is so totally Tom's. There is like no friggin' way that some hidden, powerful, high ranking billionaire Scientology alien executive could have fathered it. In fact, allegations of sperm donation due to Tom's inactive swimmers are totally ridiculous. He is, after all, the most virile man in the world, rescuing random normal folks from calamities on a regular basis, jumping off cliffs, and performing his own stunts, zooming around on a Harley with his white teeth gleaming and his hair blowing sexily in the wind - can there be any doubt about how this future saviour of mankind was conceived??? PS. Just for all you amateurs out there…read carefully. And always remember - the GMD is almighty and omnipotent. And so are his lawyers.

source: http://www.laineygossip.com/ArticleList.aspx?ID=2642
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Old December 1st, 2005, 01:32 PM   #2 (permalink)
FierceKiten
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Default Re: Katie grows

That Is Sooooo Amazing, Im Estatic, Cant U Tell, Im Glowing!
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Old December 1st, 2005, 01:55 PM   #3 (permalink)
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HAHA YEs, YES , YOU DID!!!!! OMG, YOU KNOW THATS SO GREAT I WANNA TELL THE WHOLE WORLD AND FOR THE FUCK OF IT, I'LL JUMP OFF THIS BRIGE RIGHT HERE, HAHAAHA!!!! WOOOT!
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Old December 1st, 2005, 02:02 PM   #4 (permalink)
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Default Re: Katie grows

You're really, REALLY amazing. The most wonderful girl I've never met. I'm over the moon!
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Old December 1st, 2005, 02:05 PM   #5 (permalink)
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Soooo ESTASTIC, NOw I want to jump out a plane! HAHAahHa
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Old December 1st, 2005, 02:05 PM   #6 (permalink)
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Default Re: Katie grows

Make sure you pop a few vitamins first...
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Old December 1st, 2005, 02:08 PM   #7 (permalink)
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Default Re: Katie grows

"KAtie, YOu , yes you! will be my vict.....Im mean pillow carrier. Stand by me WoMan, stand now before your PSYCO god, XENU!"
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Old December 1st, 2005, 02:09 PM   #8 (permalink)
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Default Re: Katie grows

When I saw the title of this thread I thought they upsized Katie's pillow...
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Old December 1st, 2005, 02:15 PM   #9 (permalink)
FierceKiten
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Default Re: Katie grows

ok lil pillow
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Old December 1st, 2005, 04:44 PM   #10 (permalink)
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Default Re: Katie grows

Quote:
Originally Posted by MonkeyMix View Post
Umm...please keep it down. We must have silence for the sake of the pillow. Thanks.
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Old December 1st, 2005, 07:24 PM   #11 (permalink)
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Default Re: Katie grows

I'm jumping up and down on my chair at work right now!!!!!!
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Old December 1st, 2005, 07:44 PM   #12 (permalink)
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Default Re: Katie grows

Careful there KinsaG!!!

I was jumping up and down on my sofa proclaiming how wonderful and excited I was when all of a sudden Oprah knocked on my front door and I was totally excited because hellllloooo, Oprah's at my door, so I jumped off the sofa and answered the door and then Oprah channeled the spirit of L. Ron HIMSELF and then a HUGE spaceship beamed me up and took me to a pre-screening of MI:3 and then the next thing I remember was waking up on my sofa with a pillow by my side that was siged by Xenu HIMSELF! He even left me my own "sonogram your pillow"machine. I so scored! This is amazing. I'm so excited. WOW! So get excited KinsaG, they said you were next! Come on down!!!!!!!!!!!!

They mentioned visiting all you guys so be sure you get the pillow souvenir, I mean, baby. It's amazing.
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Old December 2nd, 2005, 02:40 PM   #13 (permalink)
FierceKiten
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Wowww, Im mean, just Wooowww. ISNT THAT JUST AMAZING. LOSS FOR WORDs. WOOOORRRDDDZZZZ!
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Old December 2nd, 2005, 07:17 PM   #14 (permalink)
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Default Re: Katie grows

^^^ I know. I still can't believe how AMAZING all of this is!!!! I am still so EXCITED!!!! There is no greater more EXCITINGLY AMAZING experience than to wear a pillow that was hand sewn by blind nuns in Tuscany. So EXCITING.
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Old December 2nd, 2005, 10:38 PM   #15 (permalink)
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Default Re: Katie grows

bleh!!!!!
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