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Thread: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

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    Elite Member twitchy's Avatar
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    Default Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Defamer Exclusive! First Sighting Of Miracle Baby Suri Cruise! Must Credit Defamer's Exclusive First Sighting Of Miracle Baby!


    Defamer has exclusively received what may be the first* documented sighting of the Miracle Baby, the heretofore suspiciously unseen newborn daughter of Tom Cruise and Katie Holmes. Writes an operative:
    Tom brought the Miracle Baby over to the Amblin compound a couple of Fridays ago to take pictures of the baby with Steven Spielberg. Tom brought two giant black SUVs, a couple of REALLY large bodyguards, Katie, and the baby. I saw it (the M.B.) only from afar, but it looks like a regular baby.
    Despite this reader's claims that the baby seemed of "regular" size from "afar," we're not yet willing to surrender yesterday's theory that a gene-manipulating accident rendered the child indefinitely unfit for a public viewing. It seems far more likely that Cruise and Holmes merely borrowed a "show" baby (there have to be dozens lying around the lab) to take on a visit to Uncle Steven, momentarily leaving his staff to contend with the 50-foot, diaper-soiling Colossus rampaging through his compound.
    [*Unless, of course, someone else has already seen the baby and written about the experience previously. In that eventuality, we still claim that we have exclusively written nearly all of the words you see above.]

    http://www.defamer.com/



    I like how the 'witness' refers to the baby as "it" instead of "she".

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    Elite Member HWBL's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Suri spotted? What was she doing, shopping for shoes? Or visiting a baseball or soccer game?
    Warren Beatty: actor, director, writer, producer.

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    Elite Member darksithbunny's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    I am starting to wonder. Either he is playing this out for as long as he can(generate more publicity for something out in the future) or there is something wrong with Suri. Either way, I still believe Suri is not biologically his.

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    Elite Member angelais's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Quote Originally Posted by darksithbunny
    I am starting to wonder. Either he is playing this out for as long as he can(generate more publicity for something out in the future) or there is something wrong with Suri. Either way, I still believe Suri is not biologically his.
    I won't believe it's his baby until DNA tests prove it. And as far as playing this out forever just to gain publicity - hell, I think the majority of people out there are beginning to care less and less. And what is meant by "the baby seemed regular"?
    Did you know that an anagram for "Conscious Uncoupling" is "Iconic Uncool Pus Guns"? - MohandasKGanja

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    Elite Member aabbcc's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Maybe he's mad because no one really cares anymore and the magazines didn't offer him enough money for the first pics.

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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    I thought Steven Spielberg spoke out against Tom Cruise's crazy antics once? Am I mistaken? If not, why would Tom be there?

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    Hit By Ban Bus! ediebrooks's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    This whole thing is so weird I don't know what to think. It does seem out of character that TomKat wouldn't be showing off their baby at every opportunity.

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    Silver Member iluvme's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Ok what is the bid deal if she has some sort of physical deformity she is still a baby and it isn't like we haven't seen a physically deformed baby before. Come on Tom let's she the baby you freaking FREUD.
    God help me to remember that it takes 42 muscles to frown and only 4 to extend my middle finger and tell them to bite me!

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    KD
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Quote Originally Posted by aabbcc
    Maybe he's mad because no one really cares anymore and the magazines didn't offer him enough money for the first pics.
    Hell, they probably didn't offer him ANY money.

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    Elite Member southernbelle's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    IF there is a baby, there's something wrong with her. They shoved this pregnancy in our faces for almost a year, then Katie "gives birth" to Suri and they just drop off the face of the earth. I still think that the pregnancy was a sham, something went very wrong with the surrogate (such as a miscarriage or stillbirth) and they are laying low while searching for a replacement baby. BUT if she really did have this kid, either it's mentally retarded or physically handicapped (Tom would be terrified to let people know this because it would reflect badly on all of his "Scientology gives us magical powers and Scientology is going to make this baby absolutely perfect" garbage) OR the baby is very obviously not Tom's (like of a different race or something).

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    Elite Member HWBL's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Quote Originally Posted by southernbelle
    IF there is a baby, there's something wrong with her. They shoved this pregnancy in our faces for almost a year, then Katie "gives birth" to Suri and they just drop off the face of the earth. I still think that the pregnancy was a sham, something went very wrong with the surrogate (such as a miscarriage or stillbirth) and they are laying low while searching for a replacement baby. BUT if she really did have this kid, either it's mentally retarded or physically handicapped (Tom would be terrified to let people know this because it would reflect badly on all of his "Scientology gives us magical powers and Scientology is going to make this baby absolutely perfect" garbage) OR the baby is very obviously not Tom's (like of a different race or something).
    ^You would think that with all his boasting of having a personal ultrasound machine they could've picked up a variety of serious birth defects. That is> IF there ever was a pregnancy that resulted in an actual kid. Perhaps the surrogate had second thoughts?
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    Elite Member cheray's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Quotes.........from his stupid films

    Show Me The Baby..show me the baby..............
    Maybe you cant handle the Truth Tom.........
    I got the need .the need to see it. (Top Gun)
    Stop acting like f.......retard ....(Rainman)
    And show me the baby....
    Jack I swear.

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    Elite Member Voodoo Child's Avatar
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Does anyone want to see pics of their baby? I find myself losing interest more each day!

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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Why are people obsessed with this child?

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    KD
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    Default Re: Suri Cruise may have been spotted (still no pics)

    Quote Originally Posted by MsCamden
    Why are people obsessed with this child?
    Lots of reasons, I think. first of all, Tom went from being a major player in HW to a certifiable freak, then he was married twice before and neither union resulted in biological children. That is a couple of reasons why people are curious.

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