By The Angry Naked Bum: 2006-05-20

Cad of the Moment, Charlie Sheen has moved on from allegedly physically and verbally abusing Denise Richards and supposedly checking out underage porn (uh, girls and boys) online.

The New York Post reports that newly sober Sheen, has been forced to flee to the comfort of online dating because he can no longer meet women in bars. Sheen has apparently signed up with, a dating site for those of us who're lonely and yearn for companionship, and earn in seven figures.

'Life and Style' magazine has the inside poop on one relationship that resulted from Sheen’s relentless online nookie quest. The woman, an actress in her late twenties, has some unflattering things to say about Charlie. Of course she realized what a scumbag perv he is, only after he stopped answering her phone calls.

"We dated for about a month. He's such a f---ing perv. He would ask me to dress up, like, in pigtails and schoolgirl outfits. I don't think he's like a pedophile, but he’s definitely into really young girls. He was a big talker, and once I asked him if he was this open with all his girlfriends. He said that he was. He said, 'I like to get to know everyone, even pros.' He calls prostitutes pros. Then one day, out of the blue, I can't reach him. I call and it's dead air. He didn't even have the decency to break up with me."

Most damaging to Sheen’s credibility is perhaps the allegation that he takes Viagra before sex, something his ladyfriend describes "as kind of weird."

Sheen's publicist who currently has the toughest job in the universe says the allegations are "not true".